Christina Applegate

Welcome, welcome, welcome to armchair expert. I'm buck minister and I'm joined by Lily pad, Buck minister. Yeah, that's the street that Ken Kennedy grew up on. You know the famous story where he got pulled over as a 16 in his Mustang and the cop was being very aggressive to him. He came up to the window a license and registration.

We're not trading in the attic or anything. It was, it was good. Yeah, get out. Yes.

So from Christina's bedroom, please. Enjoy, Christina, Applegate.

We will make sure everything's quiet for you guys.

Construction site if you had come to my house, there's a bobcat right now in front of the house going back his work back and forth.

We're just recording. Yeah, I can hear it. My daughter will stop playing piano in a moment. Tell her to take her time. All the animals will be locked up, housekeepers will be fired and.

Wow, this kind of perhaps settles an argument we're having in the household person. Of course, it would. I need to come on. I can't hear you. We can't hear a goddamn thing, Rob.

How long are you gonna say talk for?

So Rob.

Okay, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, dynamite. Fuck. Fuck. Talk. Fuck.

It's not an argument. Of course, It's very important to her that they learn Instruments and we make appointments and we take them, and they don't practice and they don't want to do it. And I'm kind of of the opinion. like people who play instruments, you couldn't have kept them from playing those instruments. these kids We knew growing up.

Yeah, so I've lived through this because I was that mom when she was younger. She was in dance. I was a dancer. So that was the most important thing to me in the entire world was that she was a dancer. Yes, of course.

and.

soccer piano, Singing all the things. this poor kid got so burnt out and then hated all of it. Yeah, and then all of a sudden she didn't want to do nothing. So I just said, okay, you're not gonna do anything. She actually was really good at dance, didn't want to do it.

You'll have failed, right. if she fails, well, yes, that ego of let's be perfect.

So now, yeah, she goes down basically every single night and plays piano for an hour or two and teaches herself songs.

No, we just walked in and my guess would be she's like year four of lessons every day.

No, she's never had a piano lesson, except for the ones you forced on her at five, right? Exactly. Yeah, she's 13, But now she's goes down. She's like

Oh.

Stuff and I'm like, what is happening? Yeah, lovely.

Yeah, it's kind of like when the piano, you just put it on a setting and it just plays on its own.

Oh, right, right, like an automatic piano. She sounded like a fake piano. Yeah, that's awesome. That's the ultimate compliment.

You sound like a fake piano. I think I'm gonna tell her that you guys said that I think she's gonna be really, and she loves it so much, because it's the one thing that she doesn't have a lesson for. Right like cello is a lesson.

Were you somebody that liked being instructed or did you like figuring things out on your own?

I have like a nickname from my last job, which is called. No, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know.

Got it checked in. I'm super similar. that way. I hate receiving instruction. anything.

I have half siblings and we were not raised together. I already knew that. let's just say that you know, you know, you know.

Just like I'm.

No house living or growing up together and We text. yes, but I love them with all my heart. I have a new nephew. He's so cute. He's so Applegate.

A tree like at Esalen or something at Fantana. Okay. Is that this? No, no.

No, what's the restaurant? Fantana is the hotel, and then there's like the restaurant. I think it's kind of like a hippie spiritual. He said she could feel something and she came down and there was this man and she said are you a Scorpio? Oh, it was like I am.

Oh, my god, see that the S was huge and I didn't put it together. Okay. Well now.

Okay,

I didn't pick that up and I honestly thought it's subtle. Someone had a typo. someone accidentally capitalized. No, that was my idea. Did you put the big M and the big S?

Myriad of setbacks. Oh, I have to say something to you. Sorry. I'm gonna sidebar. Okay, so I'm gonna start to laugh.

I pontificate. you tell the stories, like Kristen, where she's like. I went to the grocery yesterday. You know where I went to elementary school, right? It just keeps going back.

I said to someone the other day that's a lot of answers to questions. I didn't ask.

into a wall.

Yes, you shoved me into a wall. you're like get back, no.

No way I shoved a woman, especially you, me and my husband, Martine. I might have shoved your husband.

No, you shoved both of us as if I was gonna like try to get a piece of the cloth of her clothes.

I would have hated me. I'm gonna get over yourself. No one's trying to talk to her.

we were not pleased with you, but I look fondly on it and I laugh because you were really protective and that's kind of Beautiful, but you were like.

Or something. not to say that she's not Beyonce, no.

She's not people that need security. Taylor Swift. Yes, But it was like the arms were going back and I was like fuck that dude. Anyway, I love you, though.

Well, hold on, though, before we move on. Okay, I'm of course having a hard time reconciling that story with my image of myself. Oh, let's start there, boy, But secondly, there's my heart. No. No.

Overreacted. I'd laugh about it. Now, you know, of course, in the moment you're like, why would hate me? Yeah, no, but there was a lot of people. it was very crowdy.

I get tense when there's too many people. her dressing room was to the left.

I believe, and Rhett George was to the right. I was just trying to get to my friend Rhett George. I didn't know your way. Like, I want to get to Rhett, who did not take off his clothes.

You need to get in there and tell him you should have taken off his clothes.

Well, I kind of love him, for not cuz I saw butthole that night, anus, anus.

Majora's anus.

Really close. we were like in a box and I was like should have bleached that.

Okay, so what I know for sure is that I clearly didn't see it. was you because, no, Obviously, I'm an enormous fan of yours always have been, and I feel like we've met before that, because I think I came up To you and talked about Louie. That's a fun subject, We don't need to talk about it. But it just so happens that I happen to know a dude from the program that had dated you forever. He had one time was my sponsor.

Laughing that you were a sponsor.

So I thought we could bond, like maybe not be a sponsor. So when we met, I was excited. I thought we could bond over the notion that we had both been wooed by somebody and then perhaps maybe shouldn't have trusted the person So much, and I remember that being our first conversation me bringing up Louie. I apologize for me thinking that was the first time.

I think it's just the time that stuck out. if someone shoved me, I would remember them, for well, I remember everyone that showed. Martina and I were like, we just got shoved, like physically assaulted just now by Dax Shepard.

You're pretty eyes, well, then, how would you rank our experience while you guys were doing bad moms? cuz I'm enamored by you, I think I was shining as bright as I could to get your affections. Oh, honey. Your wife is golden.

I could thank her for a lot of things, not only just being an exceptional human being, a great actress, But also what you guys did for our kids in the public. We cannot thank you enough. Wow. Thank you. I had a baby girl at that time.

I was down there in New Orleans with yeah, of course.

who little, tiny ones and I had my tiny one. everybody was there, Mila had the baby and it was really sweet because it was a movie about moms and People always ask me where was your inspiration for your character? And I was like pretty much everyone at preschool. We're going there And I'm gonna expose you. that's what's happening.

Want to throw up. you're a unicorn in that you're actually from here.

It's kind of rare, not even from here, like within one mile radius of this house, Which we will not say where it is, but I'm pretty sure people know. Yeah, I've never lived outside of this neighborhood. Hey, no, never. Did you go to that little elementary? I did.

Okay, so your mother was an actress and a dancer and these things. She was not a dancer. Okay, Well, I blame Wikipedia and dad was a music producer. He was Anna. He found Billy Idol.

Well, not found Billy Idol. Gen X was Gen X, But then my dad was vice president of promotions at Casablanca. So a lot of the people that came out was like Billy Idol Donna Summer.

And did you have the coolest record collection? Yes, and I still have them.

No, I still have them, with the thing that says for a promotion only.

They're in my garage. Oh, I would love that. Casablanca had the very coolest icon. It was like an Arabian landscape. There was palm trees.

It was very cool. I think it might be Rocco Casablanca. Yes. Well, I just thought it was like Malibu, but now you're blowing my mind.

Okay, I used to stare at those albums that my father had and just stare at that image The president of promotions at Casablanca for years, so you had unlimited tapes and cassettes and shit growing. Well, no, at first it was albums, but we're the same age. at some point tapes were the thing, right?

But my dad wasn't there anymore, but Sadie and I were talking about tapes today And I said, you know what a cassette tape is. She goes. Oh my god. Yeah, mom, I have a cassette tape of Billy Eilish. Oh, she put out a cassette and she goes, but I can't play it.

Oh my god, I went on a rabbit hole two weeks ago thinking, you know, as a kid I really wanted this expensive Walkman with auto-reverse, but we couldn't afford one, and I'm like, you know what? I finally have enough money. I'm gonna get one and heal that. so I was just shopping for them.

They're so cool. They are. but then there's the thing with the tape. then the thing comes out and then you've got a lake. Just a disaster.

Get a refurbish it.

Yeah, and if someone did like a, what do they call them? when you give someone that you love a thing mixtape, mixtape? You're fucked. Oh, yeah, once that little guy goes out, then you're like and that was your symbol of love that you're in love.

Oh, what a time. Are you delighted with the era? We grew up in mixtapes. Are we delighted by that?

I am. I kind of like the creature comforts of not. I can go on my thing and just play a song.

I mean, obviously things have gotten easier and easier, but we didn't know. there wasn't anything easier. We didn't know. yeah, The fact that there was auto reverse it would automatically play the backside of the tape without flipping it over. that felt impossible, Like that's just saved me hours of my life.

I was talking to someone the other day and they're like you romanticize being Gen X and I'm like, I don't think that's what's happening. I think what we're trying to say to this generation now is your paper cut doesn't mean shit.

Yes,

When we got a paper cut, our parents were like, yeah, we're gonna go to the bar.

Have fun with that. if they were even around to complain about the paper cut. My mom was like working all day.

No one was there. Yeah, I was walking home from my school at 8 in the rain. Literally. I was that guy. I walked a mile from school in the rain, you know that thing that people say Yeah, I legitimately was walking home and if I didn't get molested by the weird rock stars up in the canyon, right?

Also very 80s getting molested. I was molested, very 80s. everyone I know in the 80s was molested.

I think that was when the prime.

Yeah, aren't you so nostalgic for that?

That was fun.

You acted for the first time at three months old.

Commercial. you were a baby. Yeah. Yeah, commercial and, I think, a soap. I can tell you exactly that?

Playtex baby bottles at three months old. Oh, yeah, she spits up less. That's what my mom said in the commercial.

And it was my mom holding man, she's so beautiful.

Oh, that was your mom as well in the show, because you were on days of our lives with your mom as well. Yeah, same era, same month. I think, same three-month-old baby. Yeah, I guess we can tell exactly what the time frame was. You're three months old and both, and then, by ten, you're in movies.

Where are you at on that spectrum? when you were little, I just had to, and then, once I started making money at three Years old, I started making a lot of money. I was doing radio commercials for Kmart with Josh Richman.

Do you know Josh? He used to walk with the king. I totally know him. Yeah, everybody. Yes, him and Downey, your best friends.

You're gonna love this.

I've never met him, But I just watched his Finding Your Roots episode and I concluded we would be fast friends, Because he was very violent when he was younger. then he came here, Turned his whole life. He probably shoved some people. Yeah, he and I talk almost every day. No kidding.

I'm so sorry. I didn't turn my phone off. But anyway, I love that. It was a fun pop-out. It was a little Eddie.

I don't have to work anymore. Did you know that you were making a lot of money?

Okay, three to seven. I made so much money that my mom bought a house as an investment which we never lived in, But then I ended up living in it when I was 17.

I moved out when I was 17 into a house you had owned since you were three.

I live there for three years and it's behind the country store. Oh, in Laurel Canyon.

So this is pre Coogan account or a post post. there was some small percentage. It's not, mom. I love you.

You were the primary breadwinner, yes.

Okay, so my brains going through a lot of visuals, I always had to do it and then, when I was 13,, I said to her I don't want to do this anymore, I want to hang out with my friends. I want to make bad decisions. I want to do all the things, and she goes Okay, I'll call your agent and say no. and at that time my head was shaved. you were making some statements.

Susie and the munchies, you know, I would have flirted with you.

It was all shaved and then, you know, like a little bit of hair. that was weird. There's footage of it in pictures somewhere. It's in the book. So she's goes.

That's a lot of room for a 13. it was a row house. You had to walk through bedrooms to get to other bedrooms.

And I got really panicked and I came downstairs within like 20 minutes and I was like don't call her. I'm good, and From that day forward, at 13 years old. I have not stopped working until becoming disabled. Honestly, go on my MD, But that's what I call it the MD. But that's what everyone's calling.

Yeah, I am DB. for anyone who doesn't, that isolate the whole mentality of this fucking business, right? There is like you don't want to do it, the second you do it and it occurs you you might not ever get invited back.

You're me like? oh, no, but it wasn't about being invited back. That was home, That was your identity, and it's been, and that's what I'm dealing with now. taking that out of my life, Yeah, probably not being able to work again, going. Who am I?

Who the fuck? thank God you had a child, right? Oh, my god, I beat.

She's my get up in the morning and she's my go to sleep, with hope that I get up in the morning. and now I'm Like, what am I supposed to do? I've grown up on a set and that sounds creepy. It sounds really child actory, but it's not about that. It's about the camaraderie and growing up and being professional and loving people and enjoying humans.

Well, it feels good to be good at a job, any given job. when you're good at it, You get to go to a place and people trusted you and you deliver. That's a very rewarding a steam building.

Good. I was terrible.

Terrible. No, no, I.

Didn't know comedy. I thought comedy was for douchebags. I was such a serious little 13 year old. I was like no.

So, let me ask you so I'm in a different situation, Which is, I moved all the way across the country to be here for eight years. I can't wait. Hold on.

Yeah, we can pause. I want to pause because this camp. Okay, this can continue, so you can just give her to someone.

Give her a steak covered in Ambien. We can probably just let her out front. Yeah, this seems like really friendly territory for a tiny dog up in the mountains where the coyotes run free.

They're on my property right now because the mudslides from the river storm thing. Yeah, half my hill came down all into my pool. I know stupid people problems, but pull all the way up in mud and Could come down on the house. So now the fence that we had up there. they just come down.

Okay, I could take out my anger against my own dogs, on your dogs, cool, but back to me. Yeah, of course, you're a shover. I'm a shover, forever known. I'm like a canceled after this interview, but you know.

It's time. It wasn't like you didn't know. you were just like good.

I know we have talked about what you're talking about, but it's so relevant. We were on a plane flight the other day and There was a guy being rude to the flight attendant, very in Dax. I could see he was starting to spiral out about needing to protect this flight. attend. Yeah, as one should, as you should.

But also there's a cheap shot, but when you want your mom, get beat up by stepdads, it ain't happening on my wall.

I understand, fuck it.

Watch my mom go into a coma from the same thing. So I got you. It's gonna be in my book. Yeah.

This is a thick book. I hope I have time.

Thousand pages. It's actually something I'm working on. So all the things to okay.

We're at the same spot in life, by the way, and that's a point I was about to make, but go ahead, Monaco.

I couldn't, but you had something. then she cut you.

I was gonna say that you gave him an eye of like. I see you, I see what you're doing. He kind of stopped and then, after you decide to look him up, because well, because I was pretty damn neat.

We were coming back from. what is that? Was it a fun person? That's what I call them.

Adjacent fam adjacent. We were happy to see it was like, oh fuck.

What if I say the whole thing? I had moderated a panel for Amazon that night in South by Southwest. we get on the plane. This guy's a fucking asshole. I look at him and I'm like, I see you, You're a fucking dick, and I'm staring at me.

The point is, you just don't know who you're dealing. You don't know who you're shoving. You don't know.

You're staring at you just don't know. I'm a bull in a china shop, a Tony Award-nominated actress. You gotta be careful out there. What am I childhood favorite when you're trying to protect I?

Seriously have no bone to pick with you about, like it just made Martina, and I laugh. Like I said Kristen. Yes, she was awesome in the show.

It's like Bill Cosby, oh, no, no.

Baby, baby, I'm allowed to say whatever I want. Well, you should give us a list of words. We can't say.

Any words that people might be precious, because I do throw certain words around, but I'm allowed to now. Yeah, but I also have better parking than all of you. But no, I did not want this. It fucking sucks balls like hairy old saggy balls that stink with a taint, just bad ball athletic balls. No, I didn't want to stop, but in the last year it has been nice to just sleep And I haven't slept in 50, Whatever years.

You've not been contacted by a second AD to schedule a wardrobe fitting across. I enjoy it, but if I could,

Switch the phone. I'd rather not be disabled. But at least you know at this point in my life I can kind of pick and choose for a minute what I would want to do if I wasn't disabled. I could finish dead to me and gone like Let's take six months off and then let's find something kind of cool two weeks work or six weeks work, or whatever. I have the ability to be able to do that after all these years.

No, if you notice, you know less about our business now. I don't know what movies did. I don't know what shows are. I don't know what actor is making a lot of money. I just don't know anything.

We did the Oscar pool, which we always do every year, and I haven't watched a movie in years. I watch reality Television because it comforts me. watching actors, stresses me out, because I can see their acting, and then I get really mad. and then I'm like Yeah, but reality television. I'm like, yes, I can fall asleep to this.

They're bickering. you wake up. They're bickering.

The most wonderful thing and, like The Traitors, is the best show that's ever been on television. He knows, you know, he knows, Rob and I talked for half an hour about The Traitors. What's The Traitors best show on television? It's a competition show, right kind of, but it's manipulative. It's seedy and it's cuckoo and the one in America They do with reality stars.

Werewolves and villagers a little bit, but on my TV then I've heard of it and Kristen just suggested

We should watch it with the girls. Yeah, people really love. I also love Naked and Afraid and my daughter and I love Naked And Afraid. it's a very important show to us. We sit here often.

We will not realize this dream. we've dream has been crushed. you done alone with her, or they're up in the art.

Yeah. Yeah. Oh, I love alone. That's a good one with the. she hasn't seen it, but I've watched it.

I shoved the wrong guy. He could have fucking cut my throat. Honestly, he probably would. he could take you down?

I'm sorry, but he teaches it. In fact, he's in Canada right now, doing three to four weeks of training for other people. So he's no, that's his job. I had no idea. Oh, yeah, he could like make an igloo somewhere and live in it.

He'd be totally fine. How comforting. I regularly have the fantasy We're somewhere and I, like one of the shit hits the fan. right now, you know, like we have a bus at home. That's why I feel safe.

They get a fire starter that dude can make a fire with a bow drill. Wow, not easy. I tried it.

I'd be dead. You got to get the little bow, right? But it's not as easy as it. no, and you're adding hay to it. it's called a nest.

So if you have a problem with me, it's their fault.

So how old were you and you got on the show? 16 or 17 of all the different TV experiences in the history of television. That's in the top 10 of craziest rides. Someone could take. it was a new network.

Enormous, it was every headline, but I didn't know it. I'm a kid from Laurel Canyon, man. I really don't know things. I didn't even know. it was big clearly.

There was a light switch of recognizability, though, where you're moving through the world and now you're realizing like oh jeez.

I think I was also like kind of a dick kid, like a tough girl. So also was not recognizable. when I would leave work. I didn't wear those dresses. Janice Joplin was my favorite artist.

There's no good way to get there, I know, if you're not from LA. I try to tell people this my dream in life and the thing I would still cut off a toe to acting would be a Tarantino movie. Well, do you just put it out? If Tarantino was shooting at the Sony lot, I don't know.

Yeah, Exactly. See, I don't like going on locations too much. So I've thought if someone was like out of the country.

At this point, yeah, Kristen did it a couple years ago and she was like. that's the last time I'll try to do that.

It's too hard. You've got multiple babies and I'm bringing them over and Mom I mean they came up with something in that science that we actually have our children's DNA in our brain. as moms, I'm probably gonna sound insane, but I read something. Well, fact check. Yeah, on tick-tock.

So that makes us really weird. that makes total sense, because your immune system is looking for things that do not have your DNA and Destroying them. So obviously it has to know the baby's DNA. So it doesn't destroy the baby. I told Sadie that today.

She's like, that's really freaky. I don't like that.

Really didn't listen. I was in real America. I was in Michigan in that show. Hey, there was this new network. Everyone loved it.

Yeah, like we were, like the black sheep. We didn't get.

Alright, they got out of it. Oh, yeah, they gave me a bonus a.

Very small bonus was a fraction of what I was making a week.

That's all we got, and probably the first cycle they sold was probably a billion dollar deal. It was a hundred million the first time and then just kept happening over and over again, right?

It plays like 20 times a day.

25 every once in a while. I feel like I might leave a 20 behind, cuz I enjoy it still.

Give me some money. Wait, that's crazy. You'd think they would have righted that in retro.

So they got sued because they weren't a network. Fox was not a network. They were under a different agreement through.

No, it was because there was ABC, CBS and NBC.

I'm just saying they probably had a different agreement with the guilds. those networks did and this was sliding in through the cable.

We were just literally shit on and then when we got canceled, they didn't tell us 10 years old, 11, 11, wait, 11 seasons. No, we were not told that we were canceled. Eddie found out from a couple at a cabin Place that he was at that had heard it on the radio. Oh my god, and this is actually true, and you should have him on the show because he's fantastic to talk to or listen to. He said this couple came up and said I'm so sorry about your show and he's like, what are you talking about?

I think it was. I don't Tracy Allman show. Maybe was that the first night?

Only three shows. it wasn't the Simpsons because people say that we stole the Simpsons. Hello. I'm sorry.

They're doing. they actually were an interstitial on the Tracy Allman show. That's where they started.

Do you know that the working title for the show was not the Cosby show, or no? No, that was the working title of silver spoons. Sorry. No, that was our title. No, wait, hold on, That was our title, not the Cosby show.

I wanted to ask you, but I had skimmed over it because we were already at married with children. You did all these guests roles as a teenager and you were on silver spoons, which I loved when I was a kid. You were on the shows with all the heartthrobs. You were on Charles and charge silver spoons. Ricky Schroeder was every race.

I've known these boys forever. Did you have crushes on any of these? not my type? I like toothless punk rockers. Uh-huh.

So I married one, yeah.

Survivalist, but he doesn't have his front teeth. Oh, he doesn't know. he hasn't since he was 20.. Oh wonderful.

And he wears like a little. um, oh, he just runs with no teeth. That's awesome.

Why were you so attracted to punk rock? My mom said when I was a kid I've never met a junkie. I didn't like. that's a fun thing to tell your kid.

My mom never met an alcoholic. She didn't marry. Yeah, all of them. we can acknowledge you weren't aware of it, But you, at this point, understand that every boy in America was in love with you. It went Molly Ringwald and you.

Never met a junkie didn't like I love.

It's similar to the MS. It happened to you. You don't get to know whether you would have on your own.

No, and you want to help them, and I tried three years. things were good and then, as you know, It's up to them, and then I had to go, take my talons out and go, I can't, and it was within a week. Once I said I can't, he was gone, and I hold that guilt so deep inside of me.

And it doesn't matter how much intellectually, you know, of course, but I was like what.

Yeah, we make just. I say these things, you know.

Personally and right up front you get to, cuz you've earned it. like you say, you make MS jokes. We're all drunks and junkies, but I'm allowed to do that. Yeah, we're allowed. Yeah, because I'm representing myself.

Also, I think if we really went to that place, it's too much. We'd be on the floor, Yeah, and then we'd never come back up off the floor. and I'm really honest about that. I make jokes. I made jokes at the Emmys.

You also have a shared experience. We're both kids on an impossibly huge show.

Yeah, when I told Lance about it, he's like you got to talk to Jamie. so that's kind of how this started. Jamie and I would get on the phone and we talked for like two or three hours and It was healing lots of tears and then, of course, me making fun, and then we laugh and then Tears more, and then all of a sudden we're like I think this might help people, even if we're not talking about MS, Me having constipation, and if you go into my bathroom, there are gloves in there, But sometimes I have to pull shit out of my own asshole, you know.

Just being honest about stuff, the experience of this.

We always talk about. if she and I could go together as one person, we would be the most perfect disabled person, because she's really like. we've got to find light and we've got to move forward and I'm Like fuck this, but if we came together, we'd be perfect. Yeah. Yeah.

I listened and it's great and I was listening to the Edie Falco episode. I just love her. I've never met her, but I feel that same pull towards her as I did Katie and then proved that Katie was exactly who I had hoped she would be. and I get that Hunch that Edie is also cut from that same cloth. But I think it's very weird that both of you had similar archetype mothers.

I might throw up. I have a throw a yuppie thing. Anyway, I do it from right here. We're in your bedroom. I'm in my Gray Gardens, as I call it, and then Jamie's in Austin and our producers in New York.

This is deep. I was proud of both of them for being so transparent about what the experience was. like Edie's, like you had parents there and you were very type-a and you seem very on top of it. And then Jamie's, like I was so afraid I didn't belong there and I was trying to act very prepared and like. I knew everything He's saying.

Nine the first time they had ever spoken about this. It came as such a shock. when we do the zoom, obviously we can see each other, and that's just so we can watch each other, but

Allison and I were like, whoa, should we leave?

What is happening and even Jamie like tears coming? It was really intense in the fact that there was a moment where Edie.

Knew she was struggling and had a lot of insecurity and saw her be great on an episode, wrote her a letter telling her how Great, she was on the episode and that Jamie wanted so bad to respond and thank her. But she just never did. and then he's like, I don't even know if she cared that I did that those missed opportunities.

Yeah, that's beautiful. And that's kind of what we're doing. Eventually. We'll talk to people, We don't know, but first of all, Jamie and I are gonna talk. That's kind of the show is just the two of us, and then we'll have our friends and our family and we have Marty short, And we've got people.

Can you tell me, cuz I'm really under educated in this? my girlfriend in high school's mom had MS. My understanding was the myelin sheath around your spinal cord is breaking down and then you get all this electrical Interference. and do we know much about this disease? Do we know how it begins?

What I know. if there was an understanding of how one gets MS, then there would be better treatments. luckily, They do have what they call B cell treatments, Which most of us are on, which are infusions of ocrevus or casemta, which is pretty hardcore stuff. It's almost like a, and I don't want to say this because people are gonna be. it's not chemo, It's like a form of that where it's killing all the B cells in your body that are attacking your nervous system.

I'm gonna guess the brain thing to me would be scarier than the arm.

I'm not really happy about all the ones in my brain. If you think that I'm just sitting here with 30 lesions on my brain, It's not a fun one to hang with. Harvard put out a study that you know, of course, they're not claiming anything. They're saying like we're seeing a correlation. You can look this up to.

Which is you don't make enough like I'm slow, right? Okay, so that might be the precursors to it. And then what has happened in Recent time with the pharmacological treatments? for have there been good progress made? I got a 10.

what would you give the treatment, you know, this is a disease forever for us, and Back before they had the B cell treatments, people just died from it. You just knew you got it and then you're just dead. So we're prolonging life with these treatments. now doesn't mean That I'm gonna be around in 10 years, you know, I don't know. So that's the scary thing about MS.

Mentally like the definition of depression, right? Is that you foresee the future being worse than the president's? the president's yes. Then the present is, and when you're given a diagnosis that literally says well, that's the facts. I don't know how someone wrestles themselves out of that.

Cancer was the best thing that ever happened to me, and i'm like, oh, then you had a pretty shitty life. That's the best thing. you should go to disneyland. Yeah, Do something else. but this is the worst thing that's ever happened to me in my entire life.

I'm gonna be in bed for five days. Yeah, any victory is not a victory.

It's gonna be purik, and you're gonna know i'm like such, the downer guy. Like a lot of people are like Orange, and let's do the what you know, what? I love. the race to erase, ms. So You're gonna run in front of me.

This is like the orgy to help erectile dysfunction.

I think someone's not doing something, right.

If you have ed. well, first of all, I think you do a much better service by saying I feel like this and I hate this Because I think a lot of the people that are dealing with what you're dealing are like on top of everything else. I don't seem to have this sunny disposition about this ailment i've been given and I feel now isolated and alone. I'm, like i'm not doing it right on top of everything else. I actually think it's a much bigger service.

Is that what we need? I had a friend who is in the public eye and she got cancer and posted And look, i'm gonna put myself down in a minute. But she said, if there's anyone that can beat it, it's going to be me. and I said, take it down. I said, take it down right now.

But you were like fuck. I haven't fallen this hard since dax.

And I fell into the wall and sobbed because it was a lie. everything I was saying was a freaking lie. It was me trying to convince myself of something, and I think that did no service to anyone. Yes, I started a foundation right away. Yes, I did all the things that I had to do, and we raised millions of dollars for women to get mris, Who were at high risk?

That yeah, yes, because then you have a fraudulence on top of the pain.

Also, like. I want that woman who's feeling like that to not be like, oh, christina applegate. She loves her boobies. I didn't like my boobies. Yeah, I still don't like my boobies.

No point, no headlight. I will find that's a silver lining. You can really go in frigid climates. That'll be something i'm naked afraid no one's ever gonna know that i'm cold. No one will know.

Your tits will never betray you. no, and they don't move either. you can't push them like. look at me trying to push my tits. They're just there forever.

There's a lot of shit. I love about a a one of them, as I learned early on that Self-pity is the opposite side of the coin is self-aggrandizement. So, like I would always feel stupid, bragging and thinking i'm hotter shit than I am.

But also self-pity. i'm doing this because I want to speak upon that when you're done.

I'm setting you up for this because you won't know what i'm about to talk about. Okay, keep your fingers crossed. I police myself as much on self-pity as I do on self-aggrandizement, because I have admitted to myself. It's. equally, I'm making myself more important than I am.

Okay, so the book's gonna come out, so i'm not gonna talk about too much. It's been a shitty life, I'm, not gonna lie. all the stuff that you saw was like a really, really good Alexander mcqueen jacket performance. Jack. that was pretty.

You were on it for two years. people were liking it.

And so I said to one of my friends that I had grown up with. if you ever see me, start to get lost, Let me know. and One day we were in the car And we were driving by 20th century fox, which is where we shot it, and on the radio was the doors, you know She's a 20th century fox. and I said, oh my god, that's so funny. And she whispered into my ear.

I don't talk about it. Do you think you've robbed yourself of some deserved self-congratulations?

No, because now I'm the shit, now i'm like.

Yeah, pretty good. Yeah, pretty good stuff. Fuck. Yes, one after another after another, after another after another. Yeah, i'm proud.

You can't get lucky 29 times in a row. I did that until just recently. I was embarrassed by it.

Was it important to you to not shine so bright because you were living out a dream your mother started? no, no, no, no.

No, no, no. I always say that the secret to success is to be mediocre success. Then people don't need the downfall. I would have loved the 20 million dollar, 50 million dollar paycheck for that movie. yeah, it's not that I chose, not to, everyone chose that for me, but I feel like i've been here for 50 years because I kind of have stayed.

At the right in the lane. you didn't fly too close to the sun why you'd get burned. that's right, icarus. We were just talking about this, monica.

Yeah, we were just talking about the brass rings. lovely too, but you only get it once. there's only one way to go.

There's only one story left to tell about that person. We were just interviewing bradley cooper and this came up. He said do you think people have to see someone fall? and I said, yeah, it's the only story left. I can't even blame people.

So they gotta go lower, but they grasp for it. then you're like you're boring me with your crap acting. That's why I don't watch. i'm like stop it, inspire me. Are there any shows you love though?

It's so good.

You're a bad sag member. I know i'm a ted lasso guy. I'm like a only murders. Oh, I love only you. like light-hearted, You want to feel happy?

Oh, god. Yeah, I totally hate myself, especially now. I gained 45 pounds when I got sick from medication. I've lost 30 pounds in the last few months, not from ozempic. I have a stomach issue.

Is ms at all? Is there a diet that's better for? yeah, mediterranean? No gluten.

I think it's kind of for everyone. it's like a write books about it and you're like.

But we're pretty sure that's probably the best. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, I eat a piece of cinnamon toast a day like i'm not doing all the things i'm supposed to be doing, but You know, it's hard for me because I was always fit, Lady, but I also had eating disorders and weird stuff for years and being like this now, Which is hard, and I don't do the plastic surgeries and I don't do the things I brought my equipment. Do you want me to be sure you don't mean I did do a thread lift in 2018?

How is that? That was rad, but it goes away. Oh, it does. Does the thread dissolve? Yeah.

But I went to a doctor two years ago and I was like, I want to go again and he goes your face is too fat. Oh, he literally was like mic drop. Yeah, fat, Oh.

Wow,

That made me feel real good about myself. He turned down all that money. First of all, I doubt your face is fat. secondly,

Rare ethics. you want to talk to michael jackson's guy and go, how could you possibly gone in on that nose again? You can't do that, like how could you have possibly gone in on the nose again?

I'm more concerned about the propofol by the nightstand. There's a few doctors that were yeah.

The doctor that was like, yeah, i'll knock you out every single night of your life. propofol. Yes. Yeah, I love propofol.

That's fun for your colonoscopy.

Exactly for a major surgery. I know. can you imagine being put down every night? anesthesia? I've had many surgeries and you gotta prep for surgery.

Is a whole other episode. I have lots of thoughts on that one. I'll table. Oh wait, I'm gonna tell you this. michael jackson, funny one of my best friends.

Don't stop till you get enough.

Oh, yeah, his dad had a birthday party pre.

Yes, allegations, and now we know for certain. Yeah. Well, I say that, no, he definitely was a pedophile who ruined the lives of a bunch of little kids. I'm, not denying that there weren't even allegations yet at this point. No, every friend of mine who's been in this business for a very long time, like seth green, He wouldn't mind.

His own mental, okay, yeah, but you met bubbles.

He went to bubble's house and I went on the swing roundy boudy thing, and it was playing all his music. good music.

I heard he rebuilt the pirates of the caribbean and not when I was there. This was so long ago.

I mean, this is pre any marriages Of all of them. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Stay tuned, armchair expert, if you dare.

You.

Okay, so you're doing the podcast, messy, messy, messy, and it's very well done and you're very good at it. And i'm glad you're doing that. and then I read that you'll voice act.

Is that true? Yeah, of course. as long as I can speak, i'd love to do that. It'll be fun. Mama needs to do something.

Okay, so we were honest about the darkness of this On the mornings. you do get yourself to have a good day and you're positive. What are the tools that you use that?

So not inspiring. do you meditate? I get mad at it? Yeah, see, this is the thing I was super spiritual person. I've been going to a church called agape since I was 24 years old.

She's just kidding.

It's weird. it's like I shove away from it the more angry I get, which is when you should be kind of Tapping into that stuff. Yeah, I get pissed. But we have a coin out of my lanai, which you'll see. there's a coin My friend rob zebrecki gave to me, who's an amazing magician and he's works at the magic castle.

No, thank you. You just tried them and no, or you just never try them and no, and I don't like it.

No, thank you. I forced monica to do them. mushrooms, not others. not like heroin. I couldn't do heroin because I would Just keep doing it.

Thumbs down. Okay. Well then i'm not gonna push.

Yeah, I have that brain that like take me out of right. this moment. I'm gonna go cuckoo town. My mom gave me a pot edibles stick, a vape, a joint. No, a joint, old-fashioned laurel canyon, shit.

Not really interested, but

That was a bad call. Oops. Well.

Thanks for letting us come over And take your time, and i'm sure you're in pain, and that cannot be easy, and i'm mindful of it and I appreciate it. I don't know if you ever heard our show, But this is what i'm all about is sharing like fucking battle, not the victory speech on a stage somewhere.

So i'm very grateful to you. Well, this has been the most fun i've had in like three years. Oh.

No, seriously, We'll come back once a week. I sit in here by myself. Yeah, pretty much all day long, and you're not doing drugs. No, Oh god, you really need them.

You really should start white lotus before you guys got here. He was in here and I said now I have to pause my show, Which was real. housewives of miami reunion, part two.

You must watch couples therapy the most incredible therapist, orna. it's so good. Okay. Okay. Okay, so good, you're gonna blast through it.

I'm, actually gonna text myself, please, because I have to text because I have all the lesions on the brains. You're still so quick. Yeah, I know i'm pretty smart, Have you at all? Have you? i'm pretty smart and i'm pretty funny.

I was gonna tell you as soon as we left You remind me so much of dax's sister. Yeah, you look so much like my little sister.

It makes me kind of like love you more than I have a right to love you. But i'm looking at your little face, and it's so carly's, and I love her so much. No, that's not the face. It's just your normal face is very carly. Yeah, even the mannerisms and stuff, and so it has me feeling like very, very of course.

I feel very alone. So I like to be protected. Okay, good. I'm the dude. Isn't that so great?

Both things.

You know that I hold no grudge about that. It's just I totally believe you, because I've had no idea.

I had no idea and i've been around you a bunch of times since then and I didn't feel any animosity. But I do like the book ending, not that there won't be more experiences. But this is a reverse of a shove into a wall. Yeah, There you go, all right, I adore you. Thank you.

This is very unique and we got to listen to your daughter play music. Yes.

This was pretty incredible and smell all the dog pee in my room.

For the amount of pets i'm seeing it doesn't smell in here.

Well, I burn nag champa in here all day long because I love nag champa. It's a very childhood thing.

So I offset the nasty and normally my bed's really made. it's more made than mine is.

You'll love this. before we go. These are my heating pads. I snuggle them and they're called jake ryan, jake ryan.

16 candles. Oh, yes, of course the dark-haired gentleman that molly was in love with. Is he still the number one? because the early ones are in my heart? They stay the number one, don't they?

Yeah, he drove that red 944 porsche. Yeah, i'm 52 years old and i've named my heating pad. Jake ryan. I think suffice it to say that is the jam. You obviously met him over the years.

Michael schlock lickling. I don't even have to say his name. I hope he's listening. Yeah, All right. All right.

Well, I want to tell people.

Tell people some updates.

Okay. Okay. You have joined my connections group chat, Which has me, cali max and robbie, robbie, Robbie, my friend from home. Yes. It's it's time for me to tell you, robbie, as a phd.

Okay, i'm not intimidated by a phd. Okay, great. Yeah, you could have got a phd. Thank you. I think so.

Psychometrics, uh-huh. It's a mixture of psychology and statistics. Oh, that's kind of cool. It is very cool.

Okay, so, but the best part was is let's start at the beginning. I love connections. now. I've only been playing it for three days. Yeah, and now it's like it used to be Get through the meditation.

But I asked to be on the thread. yeah, well, I think I sent you and cali, you did, but and I actually got nervous about this, because When we were talking about, you're like, I want to be on your thread. I want to be on your thread, and I and I said, Okay, it's, it's cali, max and my friend. Robbie. You certainly did, and I didn't remember that.

So yeah, because I think I text you and cali And then you put me on the thread, But the two of the numbers are. they're just numbers. It's 10 numbers, because I don't have them in my phone book.

Okay, even though I said in the text, you know thigh guy max, and now you need a nickname for robbie.

I feel like maybe you aren't reading. I might not. I might have missed it because there's so many people and there's a lot of Screen grabs of the puzzle itself, and I might have got distracted by the puzzles. I didn't see that. and now it's great, Um, but okay, back to robbie.

So, but you know. Sorry, cali, hate to do this to you. She didn't. she didn't get it today. She, I don't know if you could see that.