Synced: Manscraping
2024-03-20 01:03:56
Hi, I’m Dax Shepard, and I love talking to people. I am endlessly fascinated by the messiness of being human, and I find people who are vulnerable and honest about their struggles and shortcomings to be incredibly sexy. I invite you to join me as I explore other people’s stories. We will celebrate, above all, the challenges and setbacks that ultimately lead to growth and betterment. What qualifies me for such an endeavor? More than a decade of sobriety, a degree in Anthropology and four years of improv training. I will attempt to discover human “truths” without any laboratory work, clinical trials or data collection. I will be, in the great tradition of 16th-century scientists, an Armchair Expert.
Good morning. Hi. How are you? I'm a little sleepy.
Me too.
I knew it. I'm so tired. Yeah. It's the last time we're saving daylight.
No, this is the good kind.
It's the good kind, but it's over. This is the last time we're doing it in our lifetime.
Well, this is the last time we're going back to, like, we're keeping this. Right. Although, I think you're wrong. We voted for it.
I think it starts next year.
We looked it up on a fact check, and it has to pass, like, federally. We passed it here some years ago, and it, like, had some stipulation on it. But we were like, why hasn't it happened? yet? Didn't we all vote for this?
I'm so confused. Then we looked it up, and really, it's like the first step of many steps.
Okay. I heard something different, but I also don't remember who said it, where I was, and the context. But someone over the weekend was like, this is the last time. And then I just believed them.
Okay. Let me look it up. Okay. Only to end in November 2024, but that won't be permanent. Time ran out for a proposal that cleared a major hurdle in Congress in 2022 to end the decades-old practice of making Americans change their clocks biannually.
And a new version for the new Congress that took office the following January has been languishing in committees for a year. Under the 2022 measure, daylight savings time would have been made permanent. And if the bill was signed into law, most Americans have shifted their clocks one hour forward last March and left them that way. As it stands now, those clocks will need to be shifted forward an hour on Sunday, when standard time ends, and then will fall back again in November.
But then that's it?
No. No. Okay. It's about this proposal. It hasn't passed.
Like every other thing in Congress.
Great. So we're still in it for now. Okay. So we have to just embrace it, because this is... I'm so much happier.
Yesterday at seven, it was light out.
It was light out.
Oh, and I loved it. I loved it. I am very tired, but I don't think that has to do with daylight savings. I think that is so much travel and period, hormones.
Hormones. Speaking of hours and sleep, you need an extra hour of sleep when you're on your menstrual cycle. And they just did some groundbreaking research that shows that the whole, like you need eight hours a night is based on, obviously, male bodies. And the actual number for women is nine. 12 hours.
12 is, yeah. The pride deal.
Nine. Nine. That's where I feel best. Me too. Nine.
So you need 10 when you're on your menstrual cycle, which honestly checks out.
It does check out. To be normal.
Not to be like great. Because we're making stuff. Our bodies are shedding.
At work.
Bleeding. I mean, bleeding.
Bleeding.
We're losing so much, iron.
Yes. Your iron could also be low.
It could. It's normally not, like when I get it checked, and I'm on vitamins. But. Wait. Okay.
Hold on. So. I'm trying to do some math. Because on Saturday night, we got home from Austin. We'll talk about Austin.
I was in bed at nine, and I was fully asleep by 10.
. And then I woke up at, I want to say 10, but was nine. 11.. 11.. Which is a lot.
It's an hour more than the minimum you need. It's not funny. It's true. Isn't that what it is?
It's normal. What if we say like 15 hours?
But 15 is only like three hours more.
I mean, but it's just like a lot of things, you know? It's like when I learned about the temperature thing, that they were basing all the temperatures of all the offices based on men's body temperature. Wait, what? You don't know this? No.
Tell me. Oh, my God. Monica. What?
This felt like a peak 2017 article. No, maybe 2015.. It was pre-Trump. And what they did is they were testing people without realizing that people were just dudes. And then they started testing women and realized that our body temperatures are, I think, 1.5 or two degrees lower than men.
And so we need a different temperature. We need it to be warmer, but it's set to men's body temperatures. So that's why, if you are cold at work, if you had, like me, needed your own, like not only Snuggie, but my own heater, which was illegal, whatever, I would only turn it on when I was there and I would unplug it every night. But I needed both of those things just to be regulated.
Oh, my God.
And so, like our bodies are always right. Yeah, they are.
They tell us the truth. Yes. Okay. Did you ever accidentally leave the heater on? Tell me the truth.
Not at work.
Are you sure?
I was not allowed. Whatever. It's too late. You can't arrest me. It's way too late.
But I would kind of have to hide it every night. So there was a whole ritual. But it was so nice.
But you didn't ever forget? No. You didn't, like, you were home and you're like, oh, fuck.
No, no, because those little heaters, like most people, are like, don't even buy those, but I love them. You needed it. I love just having like warm heat on my, like on me. Like it's, I have a little fireplace heater in my room.
What's that mean? It looks like a fireplace? It looks like a fireplace.
Cute. And I use it. It's bad, but I use it sometimes, even in the summer, because I'll just get like, I just get cold and then I really need that. But you don't get cold.
No, I do. I run very cold.
It's never been too cold here.
It gets cold in here. Dax runs hot, but I normally am wearing sweaters and stuff. I'm normally okay. It's been a conversation that I'm always cold and he's hot. Right, right.
So that, wow.
And it's a thing, like even I worked at a media company where me and the CEO would constantly get like, it was a smaller startup. So like. I would go and like put up the heat and then he would go and put it down. And it's fights. It's fights.
It's silent fights. It's silent fights over the heat, you know, and it's such a dad thing, right? Your dad sets the temperature super low and then it's just terrible.
But that feels more like, like my parents always leave it so cold in the winter and so hot in the summer. Me too.
Oh, my God, me too.
Why? Because money. It's a frugal thing.
It is a frugal thing. Exactly. It makes-.
It's so annoying. But now they know, like now they're scared of me. So when I'm home-.
Me too.
They adjust it. Oh, my God.
We're like tyrants. I know. Temperature tyrants.
Well, I think they're more like, I don't want to put up with it. I don't want to hear this complaint.
When did it start? Because they, my dad, would still really get mad. And then, I think two years ago, it's like when they also realized like, we got to make sure she's having a good time. We got to make sure she'll come back.
She comes here and she goes. Yeah, exactly. And one time, okay, there's something about my room in my parents' house, where it's positioned or something, it's frigid in there. Like it is so cold and they don't know that because they're never in there. It's like, it's a guest room.
And so one time, I think someone was in there and they were like, oh yeah, it's freezing.
Sometimes I think there's a problem with me because I'm worse than other women. This is absurd. But when I got to my hotel room in Austin, immediately I come in. I've never set foot in a hotel room where I've felt that it's not icy cold and I set it to 80..
80?
No.
But even when I set it to 80, it's not even warm enough. I think hotel rooms have a thing where, like they don't really set it to 80, but 80 is the max, and that's where I go. I'm always, no matter what, anyway, it's, it's, yeah. Okay.
Austin, we went to brunch, as we promised. Twice. True. Both were delicious. Laundrette.
So good. That was a place we went last time. So we revisited, which was fun. We did. That's our place now.
Do we say we had a P.
E.
N. event?
We had a P.
E.
N. event and if you want to know about it, you should watch our social video. And then we went to Josephine House the next day, which was also, oh my God, so good. I was thinking about, I had like a croissant breakfast sandwich. I was thinking about it again later that day, like I wanted more.
It looked good. Also, when you walk in, there were an array of pastries welcoming you.
I had a Nutella morning bun. Okay. I have a question. What's your protocol? Because this, this ranges for people across the board.
If you're generally like eating healthy or you're actively trying to eat healthy, if you're on vacation, do you keep that up or do you abandon ship?
I definitely abandon ship. I mean, I had a coffee. I had a cappuccino.
You had a coffee.
Which I haven't done in a long time. I also drank the night before.
But it was boy related, as you already told us last week.
That is a protocol. Yeah. Yeah. That's how I have to if I'm around a crush. And even I've heard, I don't know, I was reading about this.
People are getting off of Zempig for holidays because they want to like take advantage. Because it's kind of part of the whole thing, right? Yeah. Like eating, you know, even-.
It's indulging. Exactly.
And it's the first thing you kind of ask people like, oh, what restaurants did you go to? Exactly. Or like, what did you eat? And even when I think back at vacations or- The first thing I told Rob was like, we went to this amazing brunch place. We had these amazing chips.
It's a memory that really stays.
Sense memory. I'm fully abandon ship. I don't even think twice. I want everything if I'm on vacation. Or if I'm in a different city.
Because it's limited dish. How many times are you going to be able to eat this food? You got to eat it while you can.
That's true. And when it's especially like something that's native to that place. It's like Nutella morning pie. That's just in Boston. I want that.
Yeah. I want it too.
I want it right now. Now I'm upset.
I think maybe that we could find an alternative. There's no alternatives.
It was so good.
Do you feel like guilty when you eat things that aren't unhealthy? If you're breaking like a pattern?
Yeah. I don't feel guilty, but when I get back, I'm like, oh boy. Like now, it feels like a restart of being healthy. Although I don't do that very often. I'm not on a strict regimen.
very often. Every now and then I'll like slip into that and I can feel myself slipping in and feeling like obsessive. I try to adjust that. Like. that's not healthy for me to be hyper obsessive about being perfectly clean or so healthy.
So that's not my standard operation mode. It's just every now and then I can find myself slipping into that. But yeah, right now I'm just like generally healthy. Yeah. So then going on vacation didn't feel like such a major deal.
I mean we were with Dax, right? And he tries hard. Sometimes he slips on purpose, but he sticks pretty much to his diet.
And he was working out.
Yeah, and he works out.
I mean that's hard to keep up all of those things when you're traveling.
Yeah.
I feel like you have such a healthy relationship with food that I don't even think I've ever seen you like try to be careful or try to be. Yeah.
It's really rare.
Yeah. I think it's great. I've also never seen you like indulge in it, right? Like? I feel like you're just even keeled.
I can be pretty moderate with food. I don't know why. I think actually, okay, two things.
One, I don't have a scarcity mentality at all with food. As you just said, I got a croissant sandwich. I got a morning bun. I got bacon. Like, oh, and we've talked about this before, and this is controversial.
I am okay wasting. So I don't order a thing and then feel like, oh my God, if I don't eat it all, I am either a bad person or I didn't have a childhood where you had to like clean plate club. I didn't have that. So I'm not obsessed with finishing my food. And I think that's helpful for me, because I still order what I want and I'm not like, oh God, I want three things so bad and I can't decide.
and what am I going to do? because I really want three things and I'll order it. And then I'll have like a little bit of each thing and I'll feel satisfied. So it's because I like am willy nilly, I think that I'm actually able to be moderate in the eating practice. Does that make any sense?
No, it like genuinely does. And before you came in, Rob and I were just talking about like, you're at a restaurant and the waiter brings you like an extra dessert or like, and then you can't eat it. You're not hungry or you're just full. And I get so much anxiety over it that I'll move the food around. I'll be like, let's put some in my purse.
Oh, my God. So codependent. It's so weird.
So I have like the opposite. I am on a not daily basis, but weekly basis, worry about I'll be there and I won't be able to eat or like when I travel, for example. But it's not factual. It's definitely an anxiety about being hungry and not having access to food. And so I'll eat a lot if I have it, or I'll eat more than I need because I'm like in case I don't.
Yeah. So, even though it's rare that there's a place where you literally can't get like a granola bar. But I get nervous about, I feel like I'm on a plane and there's like a delay and I don't know how long it's going to last. I'm like, what if I get? really, I don't know.
It's like I'll like get anxious about it.
You think about it. Your brain goes there. Yes. Is that from childhood? I don't know.
Did you have clean plate clubs? Oh, for sure. Yeah. Well, your parents, yeah, like, are against waste.
I mean, against is not even their position. It's like.
Do you think your parents will think I'm a bad person if I meet them?
No. No.
Because what if we go to a restaurant?
No, no, no, no, no, no. Look, if you were at their house, if you didn't finish your plate, that's no one will ever be mad. But if you like throw away a big thing in front of them, they'd be like, wait, why are you throwing that out? But they would never. No, no, no, no.
But what about your parents wouldn't.
Well, I was so picky as a kid. I was so picky. So I think for them it was a win if I just ate like some amount. Clean plate club wasn't even on the table for them because it was just not going to happen. And have I talked about this on here that one time?
I have like this very specific memory of one time my mom made jambalaya.
Oh, God.
And I hated it. I didn't want it. I didn't like it. I'm sure it was like hard to make and a big deal. And I sat at that table for like three hours because she was wanting me to eat.
I don't even think finish it, but maybe eat like so many bites or something. And we just sat there for so long. And I hate jambalaya.
Like a stare down.
I hate it.
Can you imagine, knowing me now, what it was like for her to just like, have this stubborn little child.
She knew she couldn't win.
She tried.
Did she give up? Yeah. They wouldn't make me stay because I refused to eat meat. And that was before. being a vegetarian was like an acceptable lifestyle.
And so they would make me stay at the table for hours. Like my mom would eventually, kind of. but if my mom was out of town or working or whatever. And I think that's when I became a little bit manipulative. I was like how do I get out of this?
And so I developed like, you know, I need to get what I want. Like. I can't just tell the truth. Yeah. It doesn't work.
And so I would create all these like. Yeah. I mean at the beginning I would throw some of the food under the table. But I wouldn't throw it under my seat. I'd throw it under my sister's seat.
If it was found she didn't want to eat the food. I ate it.
Oh, my God. Which is evil. So this is like why you're still putting stuff in your purse. No. It's like so unacceptable to put food, open, food in your purse and on the floor and stuff.
But I guess, since you've been doing it since you were little.
We've traced it. We've traced it. Yeah. It's like it's my go-to and like I have to hide the food. Wow.
Wow, wow, wow. It's deep. So I was trying to this. I was whatever on this. Not on date, but like talking to this guy.
And I always like to find out like what their thing is early on.
What do you mean? Like their cork? No.
What's their wound? Oh, trauma.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know? Yeah, me too.
Just because I want to know if we have compatible wounds. Okay?
Yeah, I get it.
And I'll usually bring up mine first. And he was like, oh, I don't know. I guess like. he was like. I never had like really deep conversations with my parents.
He kind of grew up not feeling like he could share his feelings.
But is this your gay boyfriend?
No, no. We never even met. It was like voice notes on an app. But I would obviously refer to my gay boyfriend as my gay boyfriend.
That's what I thought. But this sounds like a similar thing that the gay boyfriend said. That's true.
Oh, interesting. This is common. Yeah, it is. I mean with men. And then he's like we talked about a lot of stuff.
Like. I don't even think it was that bad. But then he goes into this story later about how every Christmas his mom would make this oyster soup.
Okay. Like Feast of the Seven Fishes.
What's that? What's that?
That's common, for, I think, Christmas Eve for Italian families. And each dish has like fish of some sort. I want to host it one day.
I'll go and I will eat before.
Eat around the fish. Okay. Sidebar. Pin. I think we should get you a tiny bit into fish.
I would like to get into fish.
Or like salmon. Because you need the protein. I know. We're going to figure it out. Okay.
Anyway. Back.
Okay. So it's an oyster stew situation. Like. it just was slimy and gross for him as a kid. And he was like yeah.
And then every year I just would eat it. And I was like what? And he was like yeah, because I knew my mom, like, really put a lot of effort into it. So I would eat this thing. that was just.
But like okay. It's one thing to eat it anyways, but that your parent knows that you don't like it. But to hide that you don't like something to your own parent, I think, is like. I was like wow. That's interesting.
Sure. That's a revealing story, because I just never. My parents knew exactly how I felt about everything.
I was not trying to protect their feelings at all.
If you're like a teenager and you're doing that, I think that's one thing. But if you're like a kid kid, you're thinking about your parents feelings above your own.
You're right. That's a problem. You shouldn't be prioritizing your parents feelings. Yeah. When you're a kid.
That's very codependent.
Exactly. To fully psychoanalyze him based on one story. I think it's like, because he couldn't be honest in himself with his parents. He was just like oh, there's certain things. Like.
I don't know how she's going to receive the food that I don't like.
Like it might break her. Yes. Or she might be too fragile for this. That's rough.
And so she thought he liked it, so she would make it every year. Oh. You know. Sick.
Did he learn to love it?
No, I don't. That's not. That didn't seem to come up. It's his favorite dish now.
Well yeah, it's like the Jim Black. Like you're never going to like it. Even if your taste buds like it. you just can't like it emotionally.
I think that's right. Some people say you don't like olives. You eat 10 olives. I think there's a number.
I don't like olives. And then you'll like it.
And I'm trying. I don't like olives. I don't need to. They taste so bad to me. Me too.
But I don't understand, because everyone who likes them says they just taste like a little salt bomb. Like really salty. And I love salt. Me too. I love salty foods.
I love capers, which is essentially a small olive. But there's something about it.
No, olives taste like diarrhea. Ew. It does. That's what I imagine.
Ew, have you tried it? I haven't. You've had diarrhea?
I've had diarrhea many times because my mom would make it every time. But no. And you don't want to hurt her feelings. I don't want to hurt her feelings. But olives, like there'll be one little tiny piece.
I know. In a salad. The whole thing is ruined.
I know. The whole thing tastes like it. I agree.
But I love olive oil. And I love olive oil cake. We love that. Same. I know.
I really want olive oil cake.
I'll make it. Can you eat it?
Gluten free.
Okay, I'll look into it.
I think there's actually some good gluten free olive oil cakes. Like. it's kind of one of those that's like still good.
So moist.
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As one does.
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Thank you. It is really long and I was looking at it. I was like examining it the other day. I don't have any split ends.
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Okay. Speaking of Austin, we have things to talk about. So many, actually. One, first and foremost, so we were there and we were leaving brunch. I had like 30 minutes before we had to do our thing and you were deciding what to do.
And I was like, maybe you should get a massage. and then you were like, maybe I'll get a wax. Oh, yeah. So you got a wax, and then that made me think that we should talk about waxing.
What do you get done?
I get the whole shebang. If I'm going in there, I don't actually understand why you wouldn't just get the whole thing. Because it's so painful and you're spread eagle. Why just leave a little sliver? Just take it all off.
But some people don't like the feeling. They don't like the look, or they feel like it's like a baby.
Right.
But I also get everything.
Did you ever not get everything? No. Same. Once I started, I was done.
Okay, so we're on the same page there.
Thank God. But there was a really funny poster in the waxing place. I get the most interesting information of anyone I've ever talked to from people who are waxing me. It's fascinating. So, first of all, okay, there was a poster and it said, wait, my mom's calling me.
Don't tell her about me wasting food.
I won't. I promise. But I also know she'll love you anyways. Wait, I took a photo of it. I want to read it.
Okay, so there's a photo of the back of a man drawn and it says, yes, manscraping is a thing.
Manscaping, you mean?
What did I say? Scraping. Oh.
Speaking of manscraping. Hi, you.
I didn't think you would have these.
Oh, yeah, we got them. We got them good.
Hi.
Fresh from South Park. Yeah. Yeah, we're talking about manscaping. Yeah. Wow.
That was simping.
Just as you walked in. Yeah.
Do you need the male perspective?
Yeah, if you'd like. We'll get closer.
Get a little closer.
Do you manscape?
Yeah.
And do you do the full thing?
I shave my testicle, sack, my scrotum, and then I keep the bush at a trim down level.
Okay.
Like a number two on the clippers.
And would you ever get it waxed? No. Because you're too scared. it would hurt so bad?
Well, just.
. Too thin? I don't wear a tiny bathing suit, and I don't even know that. Kristen cares. I don't even know she knows I do that or even cares.
Well, is it for her or is it for you?
It's for me. I'll give you... Too much information. So if I don't trim down the top portion, sometimes when I'm, like, buttoning my pants or I... Oh.
Ow. I don't want to... You know, I don't want to have an entanglement. Ah. Yeah.
And.
. Ah!
Yeah, and why do I do? my testicles? I just think it's, like, testicle hair is just not that gorgeous. Mm-hmm. It looks a little sparse and scraggly.
I feel like also it would trap smells.
Oh, sure.
Right? I just feel cleaner and better about myself if things are shorn.
Better, more self-esteem.
Yeah, I have a little more of a spring in my step. Okay. I'm a little shorn. Is that off-putting to you, gals? Does it trend to metro or overly...
No. It doesn't bother me.
No.
I think people should do whatever they want.
I think a big, hairy set of balls in the right situation might also seem really attractive.
Yeah, I guess it's like women ask men all the time, like, what's your preference? What's your preference? I probably don't have a preference as long as...
They have a spring in their step?
Yeah, as long as they have self-esteem. Then it's fine with me. But I am a little nervous for you because that's a lot...
You're afraid of cutting?
Yes, that's a lot of moving around, of stuff and thin skin.
I'm going to be honest with you. I'm constantly shocked that wrinkly, stretchy sack can be shaved and I never, ever have a cut.
Wow. However...
I think that bodes well to razor technology, disposable razor technology with the four and five blades and little.
Penis, shout out. I hope they sponsor us.
Yeah, I think that's why it's come a long way in the head pivots. I think if I were in the 80s with a single-blade Bic that didn't move... Oh. Ow, ow, ow. I probably wouldn't do it.
But again, I agree with you. I have a routine. It's only in the shower, lots of suds, and I'm just zip, zip, zip, zip, zip, zip. And then I'm like, yeah, no nicks, no, nothing. Wow.
And it's smooth, like I had shaved my face.
Would you ever consider getting it lasered?
Hmm. If you said, down in the gym right now there's a laser... Lady? ...petition and they're ready to go, sure.
Okay.
But I would not make an effort to drive somewhere and then be in public, splayed out with a stranger zapping what I would imagine hours and hours of zapping on you.
Right, lots of zaps. Testicles.
Did you start doing it as the shaving technology got better? Since when have men been doing this?
Well, look, what also happens is you get older as a man. You just get hairier and hairier, and I fucking hate it. Really? I hate it because it's not me. I never had any hair on my chest.
Not that that's better or worse, just that's who I was and am. That's my identity. I don't have hair on my shoulders. I was looking in the mirror in Austin and I was like, I have a fucking hair growing out of my scar from my surgery. That's cool.
And, you know, ultimately the grandpas will get hair cascading out of the ears and the.
nose. Right.
And I don't know why it just keeps going up and up. So I think I just have a deeper anger towards hair in general now than I ever did. But I imagine, yeah, in my 20s it was just whatever God gave me.
You'd think the opposite, though, because your hair dies. That's why it turns gray. So it's weird that it is growing, but you're right. It's growing out of their ears and stuff. Make it hairier and hairier.
But women, I don't think. do. I think it like thins out. Thins out.
It like stops.
What about facial hair on women? I feel like I see a lot more grannies with a light beard than I do.
I think there's a hormonal thing that happens for women. After menopause. Yes.
But do you think maybe they're just, they don't care to groom it anymore?
Well, I think there's, like so many variables, right? A, they might not care to groom it. They're not trying to impress on it. B, their eyesight might not be what it was. C, less time in front of the mirror.
D, post-menopausal hormone shift. E, there may be more anemic as they get older and the body knows to make them warmer and get more insulation.
Wow, wow, wow, wow. Lots of options. Yeah.
All right.
Well, thanks for weighing in on the manscaping.
Hope I didn't lose anyone or turn anyone off by any of the methods I'm using.
You know, all you can be is honest. Yeah.
All right. Love you, guys. Bye.
Yeah, okay. So, but you were reading this poster.
Yes, I was reading the poster. And then I was like, because I'm always interested in like what's going on with men and the trends. Because she told me more men are coming in. And sorry, I didn't even finish reading the poster. It said, yes, manscaping is a thing.
Book your partner's appointment today. So, clearly they're trying to get women to, right? Oh, God. Well, they're trying to make money, right?
I know, but that would be so uncomfortable. Yes. If you booked an appointment for your boyfriend or husband or partner and then you went home and you're like, guess what? I have a surprise for you. I booked you an appointment at my waxing studio.
They'd get offended.
What's crazy is that she said also the reverse happens where men book appointments for their girlfriend.
No. No. That's unacceptable.
I think that never should happen, ever, ever.
That is so bad.
Unless. I ask you to take it off my plate. Right, exactly. But it has to be directed by the woman. And what was really funny is she said that men were far more likely to stop the treatment in the middle of it.
Oh, I'm not shocked.
I'm not shocked.
Because it's too painful.
It fucking hurts like hell.
The first time I made my friend come in with me, because I was like 18 or something, and she had to hold my cheeks open. Because I physically couldn't listen to what the waxing lady was even telling me. Wait, wait, stop.
Yeah, yeah. Hold on. Your friend had to hold your butt cheeks?
No, those cheeks, my butt cheeks. You know when you go on your stomach at the end? I mean, depending on how they do it. Yeah. You have to kind of spread them wide.
And my friend had to. literally. No, Lynn. And I screamed so much, uncontrollably. And there was men literally getting their haircuts.
It was in one of these cheap places in Montreal. My friend and I walked out, and all these people.
Oh, this is, oh, my God.
I thought I was dying.
Do you remember the first time?
Yeah, I do remember the first time. I didn't know that pain like this was possible. Yes. You think it's going to rip off.
Yeah. Or you don't know. maybe it did. Yes. Maybe it did, yeah.
You don't know. until after, and you're like looking at it. And you're like, oh wow, all the skin's still there. But I'm shocked, because it just feels like they're just ripping it completely.
Literally every time I go, I think, why haven't I lasered yet? Me too. Why?
But we know why. Because I asked her about it, and I got confirmation. You did. That if you haven't had kids yet, it's better to wait. Because I asked her, I was like, do you laser?
She was like, early 30s. And she was like, no, no, I want to wait. And that's, I recommend. Yeah.
So it's not- So our inclination's right. It's scary to put a laser-.
That close.
Yeah. To your- To your reproductive organs, yeah. Okay, so that's waxing. Now, you have been waiting to tell me, because we were supposed to talk about this at brunch, but you said you wanted to wait until the podcast. You had some plane events.
I had a plane, yes. I had a major plane event. And I didn't, yeah, I didn't want to tell you. So, on my way to Austin, I am at the airport. I don't know about you, but I look at people who are organized at airports.
I'm all over the place. I'm late. I have literally four minutes before they close the-. Oh, my God. Because there was just a lot of traffic.
And then I'm also realizing, oh, I have to take my medication, and it's in my carry-on, so I have to take it out. And so I put my phone next to me, and I'm fumbling around taking my medication out. And then I check my luggage on time, and then I walk away from the checking, and I'm like, can't find my phone. And I'm like, okay, don't panic. It's definitely somewhere.
I'm looking, and I'm like, it's definitely not in my bag.
Oh my God, this is stressful.
And my flight is leaving in 40 minutes or whatever. I'm like, okay, stay calm. Go back to where you, when you were moving your stuff around and moving the medication, that you probably just left it there. And then I go, and it was this outdoor check-in, and the guy was like, I was like, did you find a phone? Did you?
And he's like, no, if I had found it, I would have returned it already. And then I'm like, okay. Oh my God. So then I'm starting to really panic. And so I go to the Delta lady.
I go to the Delta lounge. Your favorite place. Grab a martini.
Look for a boyfriend.
Oh, my God.
And then I, so as the Delta woman, I'm like, I have lost my phone. And she was like, well, there's a lost and found in there. But then she also was like, do you have the find my phone app on your, do you still have your computer? And I was like, oh yeah, okay, great. I'll do that.
And so then I like set up my laptop. I'm like connecting to the wifi. And then I'm seeing my phone moving around. And I'm like, and I, because I don't know the layout of the, the airport. I go back to the woman.
I'm like, where's this? And she was like, oh, that's like, it was all like all the restaurants and stuff like that. And they were clearly like at the gate and moving around with my phone. And so then she goes, go to the police there and tell them someone has my phone and they're moving with it.
Oh, my God.
And I'm freaking out. Then I still have access to texts on my laptop. And so Simone had been texting with me. And so I'm like, can you call my phone? And then she's like, it's not like, it's not even ringing.
And I'm like this person, like they've stolen my phone. And so then I, I'm like at the police station or whatever. There is no police, no one is there. And I'm just waiting and waiting and minutes go by, but it feels like hours. I email my bank because also all my credit cards were on my phone.
Oh my God. And so then I'm canceling my credit cards. I'm talking to my assistant. I'm like, can you cancel this card? Like, and then I'm also like, I'm going to South by, I'm not going to have any credit cards.
I'm not going to have any credit cards. Like, so I'm just definitely having a horrible day. And so then I'm go through TSA and then I'm like, okay, I'm going to try and find these people. Cause I can, again, still see that they're where they are. And so then I'm walking and they're at my gate.
And so I go to my gate. I'm like walking around with my laptop. You can make a sound. Yeah, dinging. Ding, ding.
And so I'm doing the sound and I'm like looking at people so suspiciously.
Like everyone's, like, what?
And I'm not hearing the ding. Like, I can't hear the ding. And then, as I'm sitting there at my gate, totally defeated and dinging, I see my nemesis standing at my gate, who's going to be on my flight. Like, this is like a friend. Wait, you have a nemesis?
And I'm like, of course she's here. Like she's probably going to South by. And I don't even have a phone I can look at. Like, I'm, you know, at this point I'm just, it's just so sweaty and crazy. I get on my flight.
I'll just have to buy a new phone when I get to Austin and like use Venmo or like borrow.
money from Monica. Oh my God, but how are you going to get to the, I guess you get in the cab or something?
Well, everything was like up in the air. Like I was like, I don't even know how I'm going to, you know? And so then I land.
Oh my God, you do this whole flight without the phone. I do this whole flight without my phone.
I'm reading Charles Duhigg's book. Thank you, Charles. And your episode was so interesting. I have the book. And so I read the book.
I just had kind of accepted my, and I was in a middle seat too, which it was just one of those. And so then I land, I grabbed my check luggage and I stole my own phone. Like my phone was in my check luggage the entire time. And that's why I was moving from terminal to terminal.
Liz, stop. Stop.
Are you?
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
The whole thing was for nothing.
For nothing.
And now none of my credit cards work. But I'm going to get them all, you know, reset. Oh, oh, my God.
It's like one of those weird, because you're so grateful actually.
Yes.
But also you feel like an idiot. Yeah.
Wow. Yeah.
You stole your own phone.
I stole my own phone. You're tracking your bag. Your bag. It's moving from terminal to terminal. Oh my God.
Somebody, somebody definitely stole.
They're at my gate.
Did you think, maybe your nemesis stole it? Did you have that thought?
It didn't go through my mind at that point. It just was like there was so much happening that I was just trying to just avoid one more. Yeah. How did you find?
Do you open?
And, by the way, my nemesis wasn't on my flight. It was someone that looked exactly like her, but. Liz. But. Wait.
She's kind of a known person in her field. And there was a friend of mine that was on the flight. I was telling her the story, not knowing that she would know who that is. And she was like, oh, I know who you're talking about. And I thought that was her too.
There was a person, when I'm telling you, not even double, like same clothes, same style, and like a very distinct body type. Huh. And ethnicity.
Everything. Really?
It was insane.
How do you know? it wasn't her?
Because when we were getting off the flight, she was so close to me, which again, I was like, she's going to come and talk to me. And then I was like, no, that's not. Like from the side, I could. She also had a mask. Okay.
And then, once I saw like her eye profile, I was like, oh no, that's. But it was the same person. Wow.
Well, maybe that was a rip in the space time continuum.
Maybe it was.
Okay, so how do you know? you opened your luggage as soon as you got it?
Well, I was texting with my other friendly Ron from my computer. I think I was trying to get people to help me, right? Like, I'm like, what do you do? Like, because is there another program I don't know about? And so I text him, I can't find my phone.
And like, it's moving from terminal to terminal. And then he was like, Regina, stop.
It's so weird. It says it's on my flight.
Like. I can't. But there's no ding. But okay, can I say something that is important if this ever happens to anybody? The map is a little off.
So it really showed that they were literally at P.
F. Chang's or whatever. Like, it showed that they were like having a drink. Like it didn't show that they were outside, which is probably where my luggage actually was. So sometimes it can be a little off.
But then the dead giveaway was like. it'll show you the path that the person took. It didn't show that they went from the inside. It showed that they went from the outside. So that should have been an indicator.
You weren't thinking like that. Couldn't it have been underground? Maybe. I would imagine. Often there are like tunnels and stuff.
That's probably right. So it was under the P.F. Chang's or whatever. Oh, I see. Anyway.
Wait a minute. So okay, wait. What did he say to do?
He just said it might be in your checked luggage. Regina does that all the time. But I've never done anything like that. How did that even happen? So now, looking back, I think that actually it was smart.
Because I didn't put my phone to the side. I think I was like, oh, don't put it down to the side, because you might forget it or someone will take it. I put it in with my meds. I like put it in the bag and then took out the meds and then just closed the bag.
Okay. I think that's what happened. Yeah. I could see that. Yeah.
Do you have a purse?
I do.
You've lost your phone before. No.
Oh, I mean in my house all the time.
But not in the world?
Have I lost it in the world? I'm sure I have. Well, my phone was stolen in London. I don't think I've lost it, lost it. But I've definitely had to ding it and it's like in my car.
Right. Like that'll happen.
Okay, in your car.
Yeah.
It's just I have to be, my dad would say this all the time, like when I was young. Because when I was young, it was a nightmare.
You used to lose things all the time?
Every bus pass, every wallet, every key. Once I just left my purse, literally like I was taking the subway, and I just put my purse down on a bench, and I walked in and took the subway without my purse.
Liz!
ADHD, everyone has it now. But I really didn't.
Yeah. It sounds like you had it pre-everyone having it. Yeah.
And my dad would be like, you have to create mental checklists. Every time you go from one place to the other, you have to say, do I have my keys? Before then, we didn't have phones. And that's what I need to do. Wow.
I should have, before moving from the baggage thing location. Or again, never put it in my luggage. ever again. I mean, that was...
You know. what's funny is everyone's brains are so different. Like everyone loses stuff and everyone can be absent minded and feel rushed and frazzled, and shit happens all the time. But the idea that I would need a mental checklist, like I would need to tell myself to do it. I'm automatically doing that all the time.
Too much. It's like every five minutes, I'm doing the checklist. Wow. Like double checking and triple checking. And to the other extreme, right?
Where it's like, do I have my boarding pass? Five minutes later, do I still have my boarding pass? Do I still have it? Yeah. So it's so funny.
Right. People are just so different.
Brains. I would love if I could be inside your brain. Me too. Just for like...
For one day. Yeah. If we could swap, that would be so interesting.
It would be fun. It would be such a cool device.
I would swim. You would swim.
And I would like eat three bites of a donut and then leave it there. But wouldn't that be like such a great tool to also have empathy? Yeah. Just like... And having ADHD, again, everyone has it now, so it's fine.
And sorry, not to diminish anyone who has it, and it's a.
. But yeah, it can impact your relationships basically, right? Like I see it with my parents. Like my mom has very advanced ADHD, where... I mean, the tomato juice story, right?
That will happen.
The lid. Booby traps.
That's what my dad.
. My dad calls our house a house full of booby traps. They're just waiting for him to, like, you know, walk into. It's the biggest issue in their relationship.
That would drive me.
Of course. Absolutely not. Of course.
What is your mom's sign?
She's Pisces too. She is. Yeah. She's such a Pisces. Yeah.
Oh, my gosh, it's also almost your birthday.
I know. Are you excited? I am. I am. I'm excited for your party.
I'm excited too. It's my first day party.
That'll be fun. I prefer a day party.
Me too. I actually... I was so inspired by you doing a day party. Oh, yeah. I really liked your party and I was like, this is great.
Day parties feel mature.
Oh, tell me more.
Night parties feel young and day parties feel mature, because you can still have like tons of fun. You can drink. You can do whatever. But then you're like home at a reasonable hour and it just feels adult. You can sleep.
You can get your 10 to 15 hours and you're not like completely dead the next day. Yeah. It's evolved. 35 and over, it's day parties.
I love it because I had.
. My 36, was like a rager and I was like, I don't know.
You grew out of it.
I think I did.
Support for Zinked comes from ZocDoc. I feel like there's a cold going around. I know a few people that have it and I feel like I'm fighting it, but I can feel like a teeny tiny...
I was feeling that over the weekend too. I took a lot of Zink. Yeah.
Trying to prevent it. But when this comes to a head, which it will,
ZocDoc is amazing, because we don't have to go anywhere.
ZocDoc is a free app and website where you can search and compare highly rated in network doctors near you and instantly book appointments with them online.
You cut out so much of the process of booking and waiting on hold and yes, having a doctor you don't like, no reviews, you don't know. Anyway, it's just, it's so nice.
And it's quick. Like the typical wait time to see a doctor booked on ZocDoc is between 24 and 72 hours. I've booked appointment for literally that day.
Same day. I know.
It's really up to date with their schedules.
So go to ZocDoc.
com slash Zinked and download the ZocDoc app for free. Then find and book a top rated doctor. today. That's Z-O-C-D-O-C.com slash Zinked, ZocDoc.com slash Zinked.
Okay, well, that was a great update. It was a great plan event. I'm really glad you had it. Okay, can I ask you maybe to not keep your credit cards in your phone? I mean, I understand the convenience.
or do you have multiple credit cards? Keep one out. You have to.
Yeah, I used to, and I need to go back to that. Because one of them I only need from the lounge, but because I'm in the lounge so often. No, but honestly, it was just like annoying every time or sometimes I would forget it at home. So that's why I like started keeping it with my phone.
But yeah, I need to keep one extra, like safety credit card, just in your purse. Like, just have it in your purse, always. That one doesn't move. Okay. Okay.
Now let's do some questions. We're going to do some questions. Oh, and we tease some of these.
Okay.
My husband baby talks and I really don't like it. This is from Eliza. Hi, Monica and Liz. Love the show. I have a question about baby talk and relationships.
My husband and I have been together for three years and more recently I have begun to find when he speaks in baby talk annoying and a huge turnoff. I have told him before that I do not like it, but sometimes it seems like he doesn't know he's even doing it, because after he's like, oh, was I? I can't tell if it's some kind of defense mechanism or just something some people tend to do more of, but is this a deal breaker? I can't tell. Help.
No, it's not. It's not a deal breaker. I don't think. Your husband, you think she should get a divorce?
I don't think she should get a divorce over baby talk necessarily, but I think probably most married people and anyone in any kind of relationship can relate to once something annoys you, it gets ramped up to 100 and you can't unsee it, unhear it. It can get out of control how bad it feels, but don't you think that's like on her to figure out? I mean, I think she can say, it makes me feel. Make it about you. It makes me feel like a baby or something or not equal.
Right. Even if that's not true, that's just how you should present it. Right.
Creating a wider political reason. I like that.
Well, because if you say, I don't like that, you're doing this or I don't like this tick of yours, like, that's just going to make him upset. So you have to make it about you and you can say that, and then he will probably slip up, because people do, they have these ticks and then they don't know they're doing it. But I think you have to sit with, that's something he does. I'm going to try to minimize it as much as possible, but it is going to come up and I have to figure out anger tools.
Or amp it up. If he starts talking in baby talk, just go like, do it like really caricature. Make fun of him? No, you do it like, but like caricature it. No.
Oh.
Because then he'll notice that he's doing it and then it's still a joke.
You are very passive, aggressive. I don't think that's going to work. What if he's then like, oh, it's cute.
Oh, if he likes it.
And you can't say, I don't like it. If then you do it, like, you have to be direct. Yeah. Okay. You're saying, just mock him back?
No, not mock him, but be like, because I don't think he's realizing what it sounds like. And so maybe he just needs to know, hear what it sounds like.
But he, he obviously doesn't mind it. Also, this is a problem. It's been so many years and this, I think, is common, where you don't hear, something, doesn't start bothering you until it's deep in. And then they'll be like, I've always done this.
We always talk like this. Yeah.
Like what's going on? You don't like me anymore. Right. You're not attracted to me. Like it gets deep.
It becomes, right. Even though it's a small thing, it takes on a meaning for the other person, which is why.
I think just present it like this is starting to bother me and I know it's my issue. I feel like this, when that happens, I'm wondering if we can like not do that anymore. I like that. Because then if he does it, you can be like, and then he'll be like, oh, I did it. He'll start to dial it back if he knows he's not supposed to do it.
But I definitely don't think you should get divorced over it. Do you think she should get divorced over it?
That's insane. To your point, sometimes in relationships, I feel like there's the big values and the big things that are important, but those small things can add up and grow in, like, I dated someone who, just, the way he said water, like he said water. Water. He would say water. And I didn't break up with him because of that, but like, it was a main.
Okay.
What is, you just didn't like the sound of it. What bothered you about, if you really get deep into it, like what was upsetting? Because we all say words differently. I mean, you do.
But you say a lot of words, weird.
I mean that in a kind way, like we're all doing that. So what about that?
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