Personal Finance Is 20% Knowledge, 80% Behavior
2023-11-27 01:58:26
The Ramsey Show believes you can build wealth and take control of your life—no matter what stupid mistakes you've made with money. Join as Dave Ramsey and his team of experts answer your questions on the top problems holding you back. Listen now or ask your question live by calling 888.825.5225 weekdays from 2–5 p.m. ET. Learn more at www.ramseysolutions.com
Thank you.
What up, what up? Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, it's the Ramsey Show where we help people build wealth, get out of debt, do work that they actually care about, and learn to have great relationships. I'm, John Deloney, joined here by about-to-be best-selling author, George Campbell, and we're taking your calls on money, life, relationships, work, all of it. 888-825-5225.. It's 888-825-5225..
Hopefully, it's lunch after the Monday after Thanksgiving. So hopefully, your blood sugar has restabilized, your head isn't just asleep on your desk, and you are with us. George, you doing well? You're talking to yourself, John. Let's be honest.
I am talking to myself. Let's go out to Lonnie in Athens, Georgia. What's.
up, Lonnie? Hi, how are y'all? Could not be better. What's up? So our situation, I have a 23-year-old stepson.
that's on his second senior year, two more senior years left to go to get a general business degree. And my husband pays tuition, rent, utilities, truck,
everything for him. So when he does graduate, he has stated that he doesn't want to get a job, he doesn't want to be an adult, doesn't want to do anything except for basically live off my.
husband. Lonnie, Lonnie, Lonnie, why in the world would he want to get a job? He has it made. He's.
got the perfect life. Exactly. Well, that's what I tell my husband. I'm like, why would he? If?
you're going to pay for everything, I mean... Well, it's not the paying for everything. Some people are able to bless their kids. That's fine. It's the way in which that blessing is becoming a curse.
That's what I'm thinking. There's no accountability with it. It's an ATM machine.
with an endless donor. Yes. And I'm on board with paying for tuition for his school. I feel like after five years, we should stop. And if he needs two more years, because he messed around and lived his best life for a few years, I feel like that should be on him, that we shouldn't be on the hook, you know, seven years for a general business bachelor's degree.
Hey, Lonnie, your conversation is not with your stepson. Your conversation is with your husband.
Yes, and he is not on board. Hold on. Don't miss what I'm trying to say. Your anger and frustration should be with your husband, and you are not, you're refusing to have that interaction, and so you're deflecting it on this 23-year-old kid. It's not 23-year-old kid's fault.
He's just been doing exactly what life has presented him. As my friend, Henry Cloud says, he needs some problems, like rent and truck payments and insurance, but he's never had those because of your husband, not because of something that's.
wrong with your 23-year-old.
Right. So how do I try to get my husband on board? Because, you know, I've had the discussion many times, and his response is, you know, it's my money. I can do whatever I want, you know, if we want to pay for his school.
That's one problem, this idea that it's all my money, and so you don't get a vote in what I do with my money. The other problem is it sounds like he's been trying to buy his son's love for a long time now, and if he doesn't have this anymore, the relationship will need some actual repair.
Yes, that is true.
So that's what's lying underneath all of this that I can smell a mile away, but the conversation he needs to have with his son is, hey, I've been doing a really terrible job, raising you into the man that I want you to be and that you need to be, and so this looks like new boundaries, new rules. as for how this is going to happen. You're going to finish school in two years, or else I'm not paying for it. You're going to now take over the truck payment and get a part-time job, and guess what? The son's not going to like.
that, is he? No. But that's between them at that point, isn't it?
Yes, it is. You need to put the ball back in his court, and he needs to be a man and be a husband, and it needs to be our money, which means you get a vote. That's what he signed up for when he married you, isn't it?
Yes, that is correct.
So here's the conversation. It is not, I can't believe you're giving this kid money. I can't believe you're doing that. You know you're doing this. You know you're doing this, because when you come at him with a bunch of accusations, he has to defend himself.
That's just human nature. He doesn't have to. He could curl up in a ball, but he's got to defend himself. And if you can look back at your series of actions, they haven't worked, have they? It's just nagging him about this working.
No, it's not. So let's do something different. Let's take him out. How long have y'all been married?
Two years.
Okay, let's take him out and say two years ago, we both said, I do.
And my money and my heart and my life became yours, and your money and your life and your heart became mine. And when you say things like, it's my money, I can do whatever I want. It scares me to death and I can't breathe. Because I feel like I'm hanging out here all by myself. Like you're renting me.
And it either has to be all of us, or we have to have a much harder conversation, because two years into marriage, this isn't a marriage. This is just a really sophisticated roommate situation.
You see how one is you telling him how you feel, how scared you are, how his actions affect you. And the other is you just nagging him and throwing things at him.
One is an invitation to a conversation, a hard one. The other is, I'm throwing stuff at you, and I'm gonna throw stuff at you, and I'm gonna throw stuff at you, and then you get mad and walk away.
Third or fourth down the list, we'll get to talking about how he's funding his son's.
immaturity with no end in sight. But that's not the first conversation. The first conversation is your marriage is not as strong as you think it is. And let's be super honest. There's other things going on besides this, isn't it?
Isn't there? No, actually, we have a wonderful marriage.
It's just this is the only thing that we argue about.
You just described a way in which it's not.
wonderful. And that is, he has his stuff, and you've got yours, which means you'll have a wonderful living arrangement. You don't have a wonderful marriage. Because wonderful marriage says, who are we gonna be together? And how are we going to move forward, completely united, getting closer with every step we take into the future?
Not, this is my crap, and that's your crap.
See what I'm saying? Yes. That's the hard conversation to have.
Do you have a good relationship with him, with the stepson?
Um, not really, because we... You're trying to ruin his life, make him pay for his own truck. No, we only see him when he wants money or needs something from my husband. No, really?
Right? I think you try to invest in this relationship, and you try to help him set some goals and dig in and make it more than just a transaction. Oh, I like that idea, George. Maybe.
you call him and take him to coffee. There's an option. Maybe you call him and say, hey, I just wanted to get to know you better. What if we started going to lunch together? I'll cover lunch.
There you go. Yeah, I'll pay for lunch. Hey, marriage is not. you do yours and I'll do mine. It's.
we will do ours, however complicated that is. 888-825-5225.. This is the Ramsey Show.
This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. This is Deloney, and I'm always railing against social media, especially in the summer, because everyone uploads the highlight reels of their perfect bodies and perfect vacations and perfect kids. And I know they're not real. And I also know that I'm blessed beyond my wildest dreams, but I still find myself wishing my life was like other people's. And, based on the data, I know this is happening to you, too.
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888-825-5225.. This is the Ramsey Show. What do we got here?
You know what day it is, John.
What day is it?
It's actually, this is one of my favorite days of the year. As a guy who loves a deal, Cyber Monday is my Super Bowl. I don't know anything about sports, but I know a lot about Cyber Monday. And, you know, I know you want to make a joke, John. Make it.
Nope, I'm keeping it.
Shopping is considered a sport in my household.
That's the state of America. There it is. That's where we're at. No, literally, on Thursday, my wife, she doesn't listen to this show. So, I, she wanted a Roomba for Christmas.
And so I ordered it on Thursday. And then I thought, I wonder if they'll have like a special thing on Monday.
Why didn't you just text me, John? I could get you the best deal on a Roomba. I have my ways.
Yeah, see, I just, you know what? It wasn't worth, my time is valuable.
Oh, I see.
And it said like a Cyber Monday deal on Thursday or something like that.
It always does. But here's the good news. Ramsey has an actual, we've got an actual one day Cyber Monday sale on our site, ramseysolutions.com slash store. And it is our lowest prices of the year today only. This isn't like Amazon, where they just mark up the MSRP, and it's like 70% off.
And it's the same price it always is. This is actually the best deal of the year. is our Cyber Monday sale. So you can get great gifts for family and friends for as low as five bucks, including audio books. And for the first time, building a non-anxious life, John's new audio book is 10 bucks for the first time ever.
10 bucks. It's amazing.
It's supposed to sit for a year before they do that. Here we go.
In Financial Peace University, our flagship money course is at the lowest price of the year, at just $59.99.. We've got the 2024 Ramsey gold planner, just 40 bucks on sale. And we've got Dr. John Deloney's in there, Rachel Cruz, Jade Warshaw. They're going to help you work on faith, relationships and finances through their monthly teachings.
Rachel Cruz's new Navy wallet is on there. So you can go shop the one day. Cyber Monday sale, ramseysolutions.com slash store. This is the time, John. This is the time.
Don't miss it. You're not buying anything today, are you?
I hadn't thought to, but-.
You already bought the Roomba.
I'm going to buy some stuff today in honor of George Campbell.
You should go to the ramseysolutions.com slash store and pre-order my new book, John. That would mean the world for you to support it.
I already have that tattooed on my arm.
Honestly, you have worse tattoos. So that wouldn't shock me.
Let's go up to Steve in Las Vegas and see what's up, Steve. What's up, Steve?
Hey, how you guys doing?
We're partying, man. What's up?
I'm just calling in just because back in June, a month before my son was born, my mom passed away.
I'm sorry, man.
Yeah, she left me a life insurance benefit. It was a lot more than what I expected. It was $143,000.. I thought it was going to be like $40,000, but I do have some debt and I was just, I was kind of afraid to spend the money because of debt. I just, something, I don't know, psychologically, it's so hard to do because I want to buy a house, a new future, and my credit's not up to par, and I want to get it back up to where it was, but I'm just afraid of using my money to pay off kind of what, you know, for me, money is like, it feels like water, like it just goes away so fast, more than what I make.
What's your full financial picture? What are you making right now? What's your income?
Well, I just got back to my job in March. This is my third time being at the same job.
But I would say about $3,100 per month, but it depends on if the month's good. The month before, the best month I had this year was like $6,000 for the month.
Is this commission bonuses? Why'd you say you're back for the third time?
Well, because in 2020, at the end of 2020, we got all let go because the company was in bankruptcy due to COVID. And then, four months later, it came back and they reopened the store, got me hired. But then I stayed almost a year and then I quit in December for another job because I was just tired of it. And it was inconsistent. What do you do?
Car sales, but it's kind of a rental company that sells cars.
Oh, okay.
Yeah. So hourly and commission.
Yeah. I think when you did, if you're in that business, you could be making way more money than that with more stability. And I encourage you to do that as part of this game plan. But how much debt do you have?
About 52,000, including just a credit card for my wife.
Okay. Does your wife work outside the home?
She does not, because she takes care of our child. Okay. And we have another, a daughter also.
All right. What other debt do you have outside of the credit card?
So I have, so my credit card, I had three credit cards. They all got closed back in 2022.. And because I got, when I switched to my other job, I just, you know, I wasn't able to pay them. Got behind. And then I have my car loan, which I owe about 17.3..
And then my personal loan for 12 grand and another one for 5,000, but they're all pretty much closed. The only thing that's open is my car loan.
And what's in collections right now?
I believe it's the, I have two Chase credit cards and then a Wells Fargo credit card. I got a subpoena actually for that, like a month after my baby was born. And so I settled with them recently. I'm just trying to wait for them to send me paperwork to do that. But that's pretty much all of it there.
Hey, Steve, are you sick of this?
Yes.
Like, and not sick of debtors calling you. Are you sick of being a man who keeps defaulting on his word?
Yeah.
You know, you know what I'm saying?
Yeah, I guess.
Have you ever dated somebody, dated a woman who just kept cheating on you and you'd break up and then go back with her, and then she'd cheat on you and you'd break up with her and go back with her?
No, never in that situation.
But you are with your professional life. Why do you keep doing that with your job?
And all of this is painting a picture of a guy who kind of walks around life with his head down.
And I would love to see a Steve who had his head held high.
It was a guy who honored his word, a guy who worked hard and expected an employer to be equally as integrous and loyal, and that they went and made a whole bunch of money together and helped a whole bunch of people at the same time. But I can't want that more than you want. Do you want that? Does that even sound right?
Yeah, of course. I mean, I would like that, obviously. I mean, I've had some rough couple of years after COVID, especially my mom, dying.
Yeah, you've been hitting the mouth a bunch. And then, all of a sudden, you got this gift.
Yes.
And so I don't want you to think of this as money. I want you to think of your mom's parting gift to you was freedom.
Maybe for the first man in your family's history, you're free.
You can owe nobody anything. And you can quit this crap and quit working for a crappy place that treats you bad. You can go get a job as a salesman, which hopefully you're good at, and you can provide for your family a life of integrity.
Yes. You ready for that, Steve? We'll lay out the game plan if you're ready. I am. I know it's scary, but here's what this would look like.
Let's say you have the $143,000, right, sitting in the bank. You paid off all $52,000 today. That leaves you with $91,000, correct?
Yes.
Now we're going to sock away three to six months of expenses. Let's go six months, because your job is volatile and you're a single-income family. So what's six months of expenses for your house, ballpark?
Six months, I would say about...
20 grand?
Yeah, I would say that.
Okay, so let's say we put 20 grand aside in a high-yield savings account, and we don't touch that money unless there's a true emergency.
Now you're your own credit card. Okay, see what we're doing?
Think about where you're at right now. You have no debt payments, and you've become your own bank. You have 20 grand sitting there ready to protect you, and you still have $71,000 left over to become a homeowner, and do it the right way and start that down payment fund.
Or...
That makes sense.
We could let this money run like water through our hands, like you mentioned, and we can go buy some toys and emotionally spend and put our family behind instead of ahead.
Yeah. And that's what John's saying. This is a gift. This is a life raft. This is a get-out-of-jail-free card, but I want you to use it wisely and think about the legacy that your mom left and go, what's the man I want to become?
What kind of family do we want to have? Where do we want to be? five years from now, 10 years from now? I want you to have a paid-for house and be investing for the future.
That's what I want.
And I want you to be working at a place that treats you with dignity and respect. That's what we want.
So go, settle these debts. Pay it all off this week, man. Be done with it.
We're going to hook you up with Financial Peace University, all nine lessons, and a year of EveryDollar app, the premium one. We're going to hook you up, okay?
Thank you so much.
If you don't use this, fooey on you, dude.
We will come find you in Los. Angeles.
And that's me using my nice language, okay? Honor your mother, pay off your debts, become a free man, and go make your legacy right. This is The Ramsey Show.
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Welcome back. This is The Ramsey Show, 888-825-5225, 888-825-5225.. We're taking your calls on money and life, and work and relationships. I'm John Deloney, joined by George Camel. Listen, if you are as frustrated as I am about the economic picture of the United States, it's a madhouse.
And every time they keep releasing more and more statistics about, we're, oh, trillions of dollars in student loan debt. And we're over a trillion dollars in credit card debt. And you just keep thinking to yourself, how do people keep living like this? Honestly, we find a lot. Either A, people don't care.
But more than that, people don't know. They don't know any different. They've just been taught this over and over and over and over again. Gotta care about your credit score. Gotta get a car payment.
You're always gonna have a mortgage. All these things, it's just the air we breathe.
And instead of sitting at home and screaming and yelling at the computer screen or clenching your fists so tight when you drive, you're gonna snap your steering wheel in half. There is something you can do for your neighbors that costs you no dollars, nothing. It costs you about 10 seconds of your time. And you might roll your eyes and think this is cheesy. But if you like or subscribe to the show, if you follow us on Instagram or on TikTok or on all the social media platforms, God help us all.
If you subscribe to the show on YouTube, here's what it does. It puts the show up in the algorithm. So then, when somebody types, how do I improve my credit score? A video of Dave Ramsey or George Campbell or Jade Warshall talking about how ridiculous the credit score scam is. Or should I take out loans for my kid to go to college and Jade Warshall or George Campbell or Rachel Cruz or Dave will pop up?
How do I save my marriage? How do I talk to my spouse about money? A video from me and George might pop up. It's free. You don't have to do anything.
And it begins to circulate this information into the social media world. And it gets this information in front of people. Bombarded by millions of people, reaching out saying, we saw you on YouTube. We saw you on some social media platform. It's because folks like you who like and subscribe to the show.
It's a simple way to dump this stuff into the public sphere. And it costs you nothing. You don't have to buy anything. So help us out and help out, more importantly, your neighbor by sharing the show, leaving a review, subscribing, all the things. All right, let's run out to Tulsa, Oklahoma, and talk to Sky.
What's up Sky? I see what I did there. That was kind of funny. What's up Sky? Hey, how are we doing Sky?
I'm good. How are you?
Good. What's happening?
Yeah, so I just wanted to call in. I'm wanting help with my plan to pay off my debt faster. And I was also wondering if I should put less in my 401k while doing so.
That's a brilliant idea, Sky.
Are you new to our gang?
Yeah. Awesome.
Welcome. Welcome to the cult. George has the Kool-Aid for you. Let's do it.
I got it. So yeah, what's causing you to go, hmm, maybe I should pause investing for a little while?
Well, I've been listening to y'all for a little bit now. And I've heard one episode where you're telling them to stop putting in so much in their 401k while trying to pay off your debt. And I thought it was, I thought it might've been a good idea for me. I'm putting in 5% right now.
What does that amount to dollars wise?
Probably a month, like 160..
So if I told you, Hey, what if I gave you an extra $2,000 to get rid of debt this year, would that help you?
Yeah, yeah.
And you'd get out of debt faster, which gets you back to investing faster. And guess what? When you're back to investing, you're not going to be doing 5%. You're going to triple that, up to 15%. Because you freed up something called margin in your budget by getting out of debt and freeing up those payments.
So that's the tactical piece of it. But there's also a psychological, emotional piece, which is, oh my gosh, I'm missing out on the match. That's the one, right? I'm missing out on investing. I've been told that you got to invest early.
Why would you stop investing? Everyone's going to tell me I'm crazy. Everyone's broke. Everyone's in debt up to their eyeballs, wondering why they can't get ahead. And one of the reasons is they're doing too many things at once.
They're not making traction in any of the areas.
Gotcha. And so pausing for a short time, how soon will you be out of debt? If you pause?
Probably way sooner.
A few months at least.
I have $43,000. right now. $43,000..
And what do you make?
I make... My FAR is like $51,000, but I probably take home... I waitress as well. So altogether, I probably take home $45,000 a month.
So the goal for you is to go, hey, I want to pay this off in two years. Is that a good goal?
Yeah.
So basic math says that's about $21,000 a year. you have to pay down? Mm-hmm. So now we go, all right, how do I find a little under $2,000 a month in margin? That might mean cutting expenses, cutting subscriptions, increasing income, more waitressing.
All of that will help you find that margin. And as you pay off debt, you're going to free up payments, which increases the margin. You're going to throw out the next smallest debt using the debt snowball. And that helped me pay off my $40,000 years ago. Skies, when I made that goal and I went, all right, I need $2,000..
That's the magic number. How do I create $2,000 in margin every month? And then that was my next goal was side hustles, Ubering, lifting, consulting, freelancing, eating Lean Cuisines when they were on sale, five for $10, so that I wouldn't be tempted to go out to eat because I had food at home. It's those kinds of micro decisions that add up to that big margin.
Gotcha.
So I've been paying off my lowest account debt first, because it's the highest interest. Do you think that's the best plan to do? Is that the snowball basically?
The debt snowball ignores interest rates. And it says, hey, just attack the smallest balance with a vengeance, make minimum payments on the rest, because that's going to give you something called motivation, progress, momentum. Gotcha. So as you do that, you'll free up a payment. You'll take that payment you freed up, apply it to the next debt and the next debt.
And I'm going to gift you one year of Financial Peace University, because this walks you through it beautifully. And it helps dispel so many of the myths out there that might be holding you back while also motivating you to make some progress. So hang on the line. We'll gift you one year of that sky to give you all the info you need from our friends, John, Dave, Rachel, and myself.
All right. Let's run out to Chicago and talk to Andrew. Where is...
We lost Andrew.
Oh, we just lost Andrew. All right. Let's roll out to Atlanta and talk to John. What's up, John?
Hey, good afternoon. How are you?
Great. How are you?
I'm trying to get off speakerphone here. Give me a second. My phone is smaller than... There we go. Hey.
I'm trying to be a good Christian, man. My daughter, my youngest daughter, moved to Denver earlier this year, and I've been having to monthly kind of help her out to make her in meetings.
Okay. Can I pause real quick? Can I pause real quick?
Sure. Yep.
Let's change your language. You don't have to do anything. You've chosen to send her money and fund whatever world she's living in.
I'm correct. I'm helping fund her lifestyle.
Okay. And... Cool.
I'm reaching a point where I fear... I know that personally, when I was in my mid-20s, I was going nowhere, and I was in debt. And I chose to change my life, and I went back to school, and then I had a really successful career after that. And now, at 63, I've been able to retire really based on concepts that Dave preaches.
Okay.
But it's hard as a father to go, you know what? I know. after she pays rent the end of this week, she doesn't have money for food for the rest of the week.
And... How old is she?
I start feeling guilty, but I feel like I'm enabling her at the same time.
There you go.
So I want you to tattoo this sentence on your chest. And it didn't originate with me. I think it originated with Brene Brown, but it comes from somebody smarter than me. When you're doing the right thing relationally, and the right thing right now is not to fund somebody's further spiraling into the ground. I want you to choose guilt over resentment every time.
Okay.
I'm writing this down. Choose guilt over resentment.
Just because you feel, quote, unquote, bad, doesn't mean it's not the right thing. Just because you feel guilty when she calls and says, but dad, she's a grownup. She's choosing the job she has. She's choosing the apartment she lives in. She's choosing the state she lives.
She's making a bunch of adult choices. And you feel guilty by not funding that. But here's what's happening. Every time she texts you, you're starting to resent it a little bit. You don't like her being an, you don't like being her ATM machine.
You don't like the fact that you're projecting out. Cause you know, 55 year olds and 60 year olds who had everything paid for, and then suddenly they got cut off and you flew past them in the marketplace. Didn't you? Yeah. Yes.
And so you're starting to feel the resentment build. The honorable thing here, I think, is to have a hard conversation with her and say, you got three months left. But, dad, you got three months left. As my friend, Dr. Henry Cloud says, she needs some problems like rent, like insurance payments.
She's going to have to learn to stand up on her own. You can scaffold for a while, but she's going to have to become an adult. And adult, adulting is hard. This is the Ramsey show.
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We don't know.
Oh, it's a secret.
Yeah.
I like that. Audiobook, ebook, everything. Plus, every book includes a special offer to receive three months of the premium version of every dollar for free. George, give me a quick synopsis. You have to pitch this book in an elevator.
The financial system is designed to keep us broke. It's not all our fault, but it's our responsibility to take action.
Not by our hand, but in our lap.
Exactly. You can rise above this broken system and opt out completely and live a life with more freedom, options, margin, and joy.
That's it. As what it appears is that the... We looked last year during the holiday spending, and we saw holiday spending went up a little bit, and credit cards went up too. Credit card balances.
Oh, yeah. We hit a trillion, John.
It looked as though, oh, people aren't using credit cards for groceries. They're looking at it to prop up a lifestyle. And it looks like we are... That party's coming to an end, or people are starting to go, uh-oh.
Well, it's compounding, because now auto loan debt is at an all-time high, surpassing student loans. The student loan debacle still hasn't been solved. The housing market's out of control. Yeah. Nobody's wanting to pay off a mortgage because they have a low interest rate.
Our pet's heads are falling off.
We're taking out HELOCs because we have equity in our home, and this is the solution to all of our problems. We're robbing our 401ks, left and right. And then we're wondering why the guy in the White House ruined our life, because it's all the inflation, John. The eggs prices are out of control. Or we could go, I'm going to take control of that guy in the mirror, and he's going to get on a budget, and he's going to get out of debt, and he's going to change his family tree.
And it's in my control and my power. That agency is like a superpower, John. It feels so good to just not have to wait for someone else to try to fix your life.
I remember Jocko and I were doing an event together, the Navy SEAL.
What a flex, by the way.
But he was talking about, hey, back in the, in, you know, I'll say, the Middle Ages, you finished a war, not when your tour was over, but when the war was over. And people left their family, particularly men, would leave their families and go fight.
And they came back when it was over, which might be years, right? It might be a long time. And I think about the sacrifices made so that my family would be okay. So my family's land. that's been in my family for however many hundreds or thousands of years, like I'm going to go away and do whatever I have to do.
And when I fast forward to now, and people are like, well, I don't want to take a second job or a third job because there's little league games. And because my shows are like, it becomes, we have to, we have to put ourselves in a historical perspective and say, yep, you might lose some memories for two or three years and you free everybody, right? And your book is a roadmap to, here's a modern day heading out for war, to get off this system and to reclaim your life, right? Reclaim margin, reclaim peace. And if you do it for two, three, four years, and you don't owe anybody anything, your kids don't know that kind of peace, right?
Your marriage doesn't know that kind of peace.
Well, and then there's a generational ripple effect, right? Because you took care of your family and you got to take care of your kids. Your kids got to take care of their kids. You got to leave an inheritance, leave a legacy. And so the book unpacks in the first two thirds, just how disgusting the system is.
to make you want to take a shower. It'll give you the ick enough to go, I'm going to try to cut up that credit card once and for all. I guess I don't need it. I guess I don't need to keep up my credit score. I guess I am going to pay my student loans off because there's no white knight coming in on the horse to save me.
Those kinds of decisions, I think, is what people need going into next year as they go. My life didn't change last year because of some guy in the White House or because of the housing market. I'm going to make some changes. And so this book lays out how I did it, how I went from broke to millionaire, how I broke free from the system. And I've seen so many people stand on our debt-free stage and say the same exact thing.
Well, dude, I'm proud of you. Thanks for putting this out into the world, into a world that desperately needs it.
And I try to do it with humor, as I do, John, and lots of research. You know me. Yeah. I got to have fun while I'm doing it.
I trust the research part. The humor part, I don't know about that.
There's a poison reference in there. that was just for you. So see if you can spot it.
I would have preferred a John Delaney reference, but that's cool. Go to ramsaysolutions.com slash store. It's 20 bucks. Go ahead and get on the pre-order list right now. Let's go out to New Hampshire and talk to Annie.
What's up, Annie?
Hi, how are you?
We're doing all right. How are you?
Good, thanks. Thanks for taking my call.
You got it. What's up?
Well, I found myself. It's been a hard few years. I have four kids, and I'm going through a really bad divorce.
It's okay. He left completely, and I don't know where he is. I am getting child support and alimony, but I was a stay-at-home mom. I'm 35 years old. I have about 20 grand in student loan debt, and I'm not sure where to start.
I have a two-and-a-half-year-old, and I'm home with her right now.
Are your other kids in school?
Yeah, I have three kids in school. Okay, and then two-and-a-half-year-old. Eleven, ten, and seven.
So you have a lot going on. What question can I help you with today?
So question, it's like, I mean, I did three-and-a-half years of college, but it was like a theater communications degree. Should I finish my degree, or should I, I mean, should I focus on like working with my child at like a preschool and just budgeting?
Do you have enough? Does your alimony and child support, is it certified by a courtroom? Yes. Okay, so the divorce is final?
In March, it'll be final.
Okay, but the payments have been locked in? Yes, yes. It's not just some agreement that your husband just sent a check?
What is that income every month?
It's about $6,100..
Okay, and that's enough to cover all the bills and more?
Yeah, well, he is covering all the house bills right now. I would have had higher alimony if he wasn't doing that. Okay. Does that make sense? Yeah.
Yeah.
What other debt do you have outside of the $20,000 in student loans?
Maybe like $30,000 in credit card debt.
Okay, and how much money do you have in the bank?
Uh, maybe like $6,000..
Okay, great. So what we're going to do is focus on this debt payoff, because that's going to give you some breathing room here. if you free up those payments. That's going to give you at least a few hundred bucks extra every single month, correct?
Yes. And then that'll help us build a fully funded emergency fund. I want you to have six months of expenses. So add up what monthly expenses are to run your house and then multiply that by six. That's going to be your next goal after we get rid of this debt.
Okay. And then we're going to focus on, do we go back to work? What do we do with childcare? And focus on those decisions after that.
But I think you're going to have to go back to work to get this stuff back, right? I mean, to get this debt paid off.
How much money do you have left over to throw at debt each month?
Uh, so, this is kind of crazy. I just, I let him handle all the finances.
Starting today, you handle it. And we're going to help you with that. Yeah.
We're going to hook you up with a whole bunch of stuff, but you're going to have to use these tools. Here's what you need right now, more than anything, a plan. Yes. Because you've been spinning out for a long time, haven't you? Your whole world blew up, right?
Yep. Yeah.
So we're going to hook you up with a bunch of resources, including a financial coach that will help you build a budget from the floor up. Okay. Cause all this stuff's new. You've been letting somebody do this. We're going to get you taken care of.
I want you to follow this and listen, this is real important. You had four kids and the picture of your life that you had mapped out for the next, probably almost two decades was to be a stay at home mom. That world is probably over that picture. That's okay. It's just going to be very different.
You're gonna have to grieve what was, and then you're gonna have to just build a new picture. And now you're going to be a working single mom with four kids. It's going to be busy. It's going to be chaotic. And we're going to give you some tools and you're going to use some resources in your community and you're going to knock this thing out of the park.
Okay. We believe in you. Do you believe in you?
Yeah. And you know what's so awesome? My kids have been, we've been listening to you guys all weekend, and my son, who's 11, he goes, come on, are you calling, calling, calling?
Well, I'm glad you did. Cause we got you. All right. I'm going to send you building a non-anxious life. We're going to send you FPU.
We're going to send you every dollar for a year and some time, a couple of sessions with a financial coach. We've got you. Call anytime. We're so sorry this happened. It's the first hour in the books here on the Ramsey show.
What's going on? live from the headquarters of Ramsey. solutions. It's the Ramsey show where we help people build wealth, get out of debt, find and do work. They love and actually learn how to be in relationships with one another.
I'm John Deloney, joined by my good friend, George camel, and we're taking your calls on money, life, work, relationships, all of it. Triple eight, eight to five, five to two, five, triple, eight, eight to five, five to two, five. Let's go out to the TOM, to Tom and Peoria, Peoria, Illinois. What's up, Tom?
Hey guys. Thanks for taking my call. Just had a quick question for you.
What's up?
So my son is in fifth grade and he's on the basketball team. He plays for the fifth, sixth and seventh grade team and also the eighth grade team.
Dude, is he a stud or is it a teeny tiny school?
Not to boast, but he is. He's pretty good. He plays on the travel team as well, but for his school team, they're trying to buy sweatpants and a hoodie for all the kids. So that way, when they go to home games and away games, they look uniform, you know, as a, as a team. Some parents are not able to afford the sweatpants.
Okay.
And so the total amount is just under $1,400 for 21 sets of sweatpants and sweatshirts. They're about $900 short. My wife and I are in baby steps four through six, and we were just wondering, I was wanting your guys' opinion. Is it okay for us to go ahead and just pay that difference?
Uh, I would. Okay. If we can afford it, um, George, you can weigh in on the money side, but, and I would do it in a way that just says an anonymous donor came through. Exactly. And, um, I wouldn't want to become like, I'm the parent who, but a, or just let the, coach say, Hey, we were able to get the money together.
It's awesome. Right. And that can be a conversation between you and your son when he's a little bit older. And that'd be cool to him what generosity looks like. But, um, yeah, I would.
What do you think, George?
Yeah. I was going to include. that exact caveat is just do it in a way that doesn't feel like, Hey guys, I got this one. Tom's got this, which is a very nice thing to do. How have you guys currently raised those funds?
The other 500 bucks.
Uh, the school's trying to do, they call it a hot shot. It's just a raffle during the halftime of the games. And so they've raised, you know, 30 bucks here, 40 bucks here. A couple of other parents have been able to donate, you know, maybe 40, 60, $80, but.
So you're going to finish this off with 900 bucks in the raffle.
Cause it's already anonymous, right? Correct. And you might win the raffle. You'll win like a gift basket. What is this?
Uh, you get to shoot four shots during halftime. And if you, if you make a shot, you get something from the concession stand.
I hope that's you, Tom.
Well, and Hey, Tom. So one of the things that is, um, I, I learned from a group of college students. So this group of college students moved into a low income part of the community, not to save the community, but to become a neighbor. And these, it was one of the greatest privileges of my life, working with college students who were so brilliant at solving some of these problems that adults overcomplicate. But here's what they did.
And it was magic. They lived in an area where people couldn't afford Christmas presents for their kids. And so what they did are multiple Christmas presents. What they did was they offered people opportunities to basically earn some sort of. Credit.
clean up the park, come help us with some of our weekly meals. Because they would serve all the kids in the neighborhood, just a free meal. All right. Okay. And what they allowed the parents to do is to retain their dignity.
They may not have 20 bucks, but they sure had half an hour on a Saturday to go help clean up the park. And that translated into a toy, because the kids did a great, the college students did a great job raising funds to buy some of these toys. But the thing that they were helped preserve in those neighborhood parents was their dignity. Okay. They got to work towards a thing, these gifts, even though it wasn't a money exchange, it was a time exchange.
It was an expertise exchange. It was a support exchange. And so I say all that to say, it may be that you can have time. This may be time prohibitive, but maybe you've got time to set up one more thing at a local church or a local something or other. And all the parents who come and help, Hey guys, I think we have an opportunity to raise a little bit more money, but we're going to all clean the church building at this local church and they're going to kick in some money.
And then look at that. They kicked in $900..
Okay.
Right. And so the parents might not have the money, but they might have the time in any way. That's something I always keep in mind. Any way I can preserve somebody's dignity in doing something like this. And when I say preserve their dignity, they have an opportunity to work for towards something, put some skin in the game.
Even though that skin may not be money, that skin might be time. Skin might be, again, expertise. It might be, they showed up to help. Even 20 minutes, 30 minutes. Between my three jobs, I can show up and do 15 minutes worth of whatever.
Anything counts. And then they are able to smile when their kids get that track suit. They don't hang their head as much as, yeah, I participated in that too. Again, you may be running out of time. This may be this Saturday, right?
And so I would just go ahead and put the money out there. But anytime I could think long-term about this, including as many people as possible in this, I always think is pretty great thing to do.
A hundred percent. Good call.
I've been waiting for you to get us the matching sweats.
Me and you and Coleman on the court?
Well, you and Coleman would get bright white ones. And I just, I'm, not a white sweatsuit kind of guy.
We could go kind of, I feel like you'd be- All black. All black. I'll be on that team. Really? Just me and you against Coleman.
Well.
Some alley-oops.
I don't even know what that is.
All right.
Do you know what, hey, hold on before we-.
I know what an alley-oop is.
What is it?
It's when they throw the ball towards the guy who's already at the basket and he dunks it. Right, James?
America, if you're not watching this, if you're listening, George, just Wikipedia alley-oop.
No, I watched a lot of Space Jam growing up, John. It's different.
You were a Space Jam kind of guy.
There it is. But I do love that. The generosity is rarely something you regret. You look back on, like, shouldn't have given the 900 for those sweats. Right.
Those entitled little kids. And so it's something where, if you have that on your heart and you're in a financial place to do it, it's not setting you back. And he mentioned, hey, we're out of debt. We don't have this other, you know, goal on our monkey on our back. we've got to get rid of.
We did this so that we have the margin to be generous. That's exactly right. That's one of the main reasons we encourage people to follow these steps. Right.
And I want, there is people who are in dire poverty, who need help right now. Right. And so I'm not talking about that group of folks, right? I'm talking about, there's a difference between walking into, I'll just say, Waffle House, and you can pull one of the waiters outside and just say, hey, thinking about you, here's $500, right? The dollar amount would be the same.
But if they, if you go in with your family and it's late and you're tired and they do a great job and they make some jokes, the waiter does and make sure your coffee is always refilled, and you pull them aside and you say, hey, you gave me and my family something we haven't had in a long time. And that is focused time together. And you gave us peace. And I'm so grateful that you use your talents. I know you're exhausted.
I know this probably isn't your career destination, right? But you went out of your way to honor and serve my family. So here's $500.. The dollar amounts the same. But what I gave in that moment is purpose and dignity.
That guy will, that guy, that man or woman will walk eight feet tall, right? So it's finding ways to include people in whenever possible. Sometimes it's, that's prohibited. You can't do it. But if you can include people in the job they're doing, in a task, they can support you.
And then you bless them. on top of that. It's a gasoline on a fire.
Recognition plus the reward. That's nice.
Yeah. Just telling a story. This is the Ramsey Show.
So here's a quick math refresher. There are only 24 hours in a day. So your business needs to streamline tasks that are time suckers and focus on activities that make money. So, to reduce headaches as they scale, smart businesses, use NetSuite by Oracle, the number one cloud financial system. NetSuite helps you improve efficiency by bringing all your major business processes into one platform.
So join the more than 37,000 smart businesses like Ramsey Solutions that have done the math and graduated to NetSuite. And right now you can download NetSuite's KPI checklist absolutely free at netsuite.com slash Ramsey. That's netsuite.com slash Ramsey.
Welcome back to the Ramsey Show. 888-825-5225.. I'm John Deloney, joined here by George Camel, and we're taking your calls on money, work, life, relationships, your emotional, mental health, whatever you got going on. We got you. 888-825-5225..
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Today's question comes from Jackie in Utah. Buckle up, John. My husband and I are 47 years old and we're both impulsive spenders.
Heyo.
I recently came across your podcast.
Hold on. Can we start right there?
Yeah. That's some self-awareness. I respect that.
Okay.
James, I know we got to go through this question, but I just got to start right here.
We'll get there eventually.
We are both impulsive spenders. This is not a diagnostic label. We are both 5'8", right? Just a fact. So we can't reach high things on our cabinets.
That would be a logical sentence. We are both impulsive spenders. It's not an empirical fact. the way this is laid out. This is actually, my husband and I are 47 years old and we both act like children.
There it is.
We choose to be emotionally immature with our spending habits. And I haven't read the rest of this. I'm just so sick of the way we have taken adjectives and nouns and created them as verbs. Like we've created them. I'm an impulsive spender.
What can you do? What can you do? No! You're an impulsive child. All right.
I will not interrupt again unless I have to. Go ahead.
Thank you for that, John. That was a very helpful redefinition. Here we go. I recently came across your podcast and we're both fired up about getting out of debt. I'm having some real fear and doubt about myself and whether I'll be able to change my habits and control my spending.
Growing up, my family didn't have very much money. So I have always had a scarcity mindset, and I know that's where my impulse spending comes from. My husband isn't as much of a spender as I am. He came from a financially stable home, but they never followed a budget. The person I don't trust to be able to make these financial changes is myself.
I've tried to change in the past. I get all fired up about something and start down the road of change. But before long, I revert back to old habits. I completely break trust with myself and end up feeling ashamed and defeated. I desperately want to make lasting changes with our finances, but I just don't have any faith in my ability to do this.
How do I restore trust in myself?
All right. So first, Jackie, I apologize for interrupting at the very beginning and throwing a temper tantrum because you're calling it out. I am emotionally immature with my money and I don't know what to do. And I've got a lot of compassion and sympathy for that question. So when somebody says, how do I restore trust in myself?
My instant response is always be trustworthy, be trustworthy. And so what does that mean? That means I have to begin to create a world where I do what I say I'm going to do. Now, sometimes we overlook, we step over dollars to pick up dimes when it comes to stuff like this. So, for instance, I am a person who will always follow a budget.
How can I not follow a budget? If I spend money? that's not in the budget, what do I have to have to spend money? I have to have my ATM card. I have to have cash.
Cool. If I take away my ATM card, if I take away cash, if I get rid of Amazon Prime, then I cannot do those things. Similar, how can I stop drinking? Step one is get rid of the alcohol. Get rid of the environment where there's alcohol.
So how do I restore trust in myself? It's not this white knuckle event where you're going to be flexing. I'm going to put in significant hurdles in my way that make it almost impossible to fail when it comes to gaining trust in myself. Like for me, I struggled with getting up and going out to get in the car, letting the car warm up, driving across town to the gym. So, seven or eight years ago, I just started slowly piecemealing the gym together in my house.
Now it's right there, right? I've taken away all the friction. Now, when I say, I'm going to work out tomorrow, I just go downstairs and work out. See what I'm saying? So yeah, minimus.
And there's been seasons. when I gave my wife my ATM card. I was out of control. I was an emotionally immature spender. I gave my wife my ATM card.
So I literally couldn't spend. And then I had to sit with that discomfort. What do I want to buy right now? Oh, I don't really want to buy anything. I'm bored.
Or I have a scary meeting coming up. Or I don't really want to go do this assignment. Or I have administrative tasks I don't want to do. I had to deal with why I was feeling those things. I didn't have that emotional, that little scrolling thing that makes you feel so good.
That dopamine, dopamine, dopamine. I didn't have that anymore, right? So how do you restore trust? Become trustworthy. What do you think, George?
Yeah, I'm with that. I was just thinking there's this element of kind of making the bad habits more difficult and making the good habits easy. And part of that is I'm taking the apps off my home screen and putting just every dollar there. So anytime I open my phone, I see every dollar. It's a reminder.
I'm going to put the every dollar sticker on my debit card so that I'm reminded to go check the app to make sure I have the money and make sure I budget for it. It's things like that that you might sound silly, might seem silly to other people. But if it keeps you on track, if that calendar where you have the red X, because you did one more day of budgeting and you tracked it, that's a win. You don't want to break the chain now. That stuff matters psychologically.
And so I don't know what that is for our friend Jackie, but she's got to figure out the root of that and where she's stumbling. And if that is Amazon, we're taking out our debit card information. We are deleting it. We are making it difficult, blocking that website on our computer, whatever we have to do in order to get those good habits in place.
I can't stress that enough that we over intellectualize behavior change sometimes.
And sit down with your husband and say, hey, it's really, really important to me that every week we do a budget together. Every Sunday night, can we just put this on the calendar that we don't ever miss this? It's so important to me. It helps me feel safe. I'm trying to change my life.
I want to change our tree. I want to change everything about our world. Will you just have this budget meeting with me on Sundays? Right. What husband's going to say no to that?
And afterwards we get to watch our favorite show. And we can't do that until we have the budget meeting. Yes.
Or if you want to be more adventurous than watch a show, but we'll do things together after that. Right. But it's about bringing people together. And good for you, Jackie. Good for you.
This kind of change is hard, but also wow. And by the way, changing a scarcity mindset, begin to keep a gratitude journal. Write down five things a day that start with, I am grateful for. And begin to tip. well.
Scarcity mindset cannot be in the presence of... That's right. It withers and dies on its own little thorny vine when you are insanely generous, right? Because then you realize, oh, I gave this guy... I over-tipped this person because they were so wonderful.
I gave them their light bill or their water bill for the month. And that means I got to make lunch for the next two days. That exchange is almost always worth it, right? Always, always. So good for you, Jackie.
Great, great question.
We're going to run out of time to take a call. Let's talk about... Let's run up here on Jade's new book.
Oh, yes. Our friend Jade Warshaw has got a brand new quick read. It's her first one ever coming out on December 5th called Money's Not a Math Problem. And you can pre-order today for just 10 bucks. You'll also get access to a live online Q&A with Jade.
And in this quick read, Jade uncovers the five lies we tend to believe about budgeting. The right budgets, the best budgets. They set people free to accomplish their money goals with control and confidence. And Dave has been saying for decades, personal finance is 20% head knowledge. It's 80% behavior.
And that's what this book tackles. This quick read is not just about the numbers. It's about your mindset and your behavior. In there, Jade's going to share her story about her and her husband, Sam, how they paid off $460,000 in debt, including $280K of student loans, with combating these five lies. And included in the book is a special offer to get three months of the premium version of EveryDollar totally free for new users only.
So go check it out today at ramsysolutions.com slash store. While you're there, you'll notice we've got the Cyber Monday sale popping off, John, with tons of incredible deals. I mean, you could really stock up. I don't know. Is it going to be a very Ramsey Christmas under the tree for you guys?
Who knows? I hope so.
If you're tired of going into your kid's bedroom, and you're like just walking through family Christmases, and there's just discarded stuff, just junk.
The toy that instantly broke.
Yeah. Or just a dumb... That book looks...
It needed D batteries, John. We don't have enough D batteries.
Vampire love story book. What if this year you bought presents that actually had the potential to teach in a fun way and change people's lives? Go to ramsysolutions.com slash store. We'll be right back.
So here's a quick math refresher. There are only 24 hours in a day. So your business needs to streamline tasks that are time suckers and focus on activities that make money. So, to reduce headaches as they scale, smart businesses, use NetSuite by Oracle, the number one cloud financial system. NetSuite helps you improve efficiency by bringing all your major business processes into one platform.
So join the more than 37,000 smart businesses like Ramsey Solutions that have done the math and graduated to NetSuite. And right now you can download NetSuite's KPI checklist absolutely free at NetSuite.com slash Ramsey. That's NetSuite.com slash Ramsey.
This is the Ramsey Show, 888-825-5225.. Let's go out to Richmond, Virginia and talk to the LIV. What's up, Liv?
Hey, how are you guys? Thank you for taking my call.
You bet. Thanks for calling. What's up?
Okay, so my question is like with the amount of debt that I'm facing, should I just go ahead and start paying my debt off or start the first step of the baby steps? I'm 25 and I have about, like, I want to say, about, $31,000 worth of debt. $20,000 of that is to the car that I just bought. And then $4,000 of that is towards a credit card that I actually, sorry to admit, I had to set a payment plan up for because I didn't want it to go to like judgment or anything like that. And I, kind of like, made a lot of mistakes just being young, and I'm like in the process of my life right now, just trying to clean it up.
But I work two jobs and I'm still living paycheck to paycheck, and I'm just trying to figure it out right now.
Well, thank you for your honesty. We're not here to judge you or beat you up. We want to help you with a plan that actually works, because so far, Liv's plan ain't cutting it. Yeah. I remember being there.
I was the same way. I think I was 23 when I got on this plan and I had $40,000 in consumer debt. So I remember that feeling going like, is this it? This is this like American dream thing that I've been chasing down my entire, heading into my adult life. So we want to help you here.
What's your income from these two jobs?
So for my first job, I would say a month, monthly growth. I make about $4,000 and then my second job is part-time. I probably make about $700 of growth.
A month?
Yeah.
Okay. So you're making over well over $50,000 and you've got $31,000 in debt. This is a simple math equation of how do we pay this off very quickly to get rid of this debt in, let's say, 18 months or two years. Does that sound about right?
Yeah.
And so it's going to start with baby step one. There's a reason why these baby steps work. You've got to do them in order, with focused intensity, because when we try to do too many things at once, we tend to get nothing done. Okay. So how much money do you have in the bank right now?
Not a lot, because I'm a really bad spender. The email just submitted, I'm not going to be impulsive. I'm an irresponsible spender. Hey, look at that.
Liv, you're going to be out of debt in no time. You know why? Because you take responsibility. That's incredible. Good for you.
So where are you tending to spend money?
Fast food and recreational, if you guys know what I mean.
Oh, okay. Okay. Well, how about this? Can you put some restrictions in place to where you go, I'm going straight from work to home because I've got food at home. Yeah.
And even when it's inconvenient and I feel late, oh, remember, I meal prep Sunday. I already prepped all the chicken and rice and broccoli for the week. So I don't really have an excuse to go eat out.
Okay.
Is that part of it is just convenience?
Yeah, definitely. Definitely. I've stopped eating out as much because I was eating out, it came up to roughly about $5.50 a month.
When you added it up.
Yeah. Yeah.
That will definitely give you some sticker shock, because people think, well, I probably spend $150 on eating out. And then you actually go, add up your bank statement and you go, oh, it's more like $5.50.. Okay. Yeah. We were in the ballpark.
So that's part. one is really getting the spending under control. And part two is, can we increase income even more? And when you do that, you'll create something called margin in your budget, when you learn how to spend less and make more. And that's going to help you pay off this debt really quickly.
Okay. So that's what I was also wondering, if I picked up a third job, would that be burning myself out or am I just thinking lazy?
I don't know that I like those options.
Yeah, you gave yourself super crappy options. Do I want diarrhea or to throw up? How about neither of those? Let's pick two. Yeah.
Look at it as, okay, I can get four months of my life back if I pick up a few more hours. Because I'll be out of debt faster and I can quit the side jobs faster.
What are your jobs that you do right now?
Okay. I'm an office admin for a pool company here in Virginia. And then part-time, I work at an adult novelty shop.
Okay. What does your pool job pay you?
About $15 an hour. And my second job is $12 an hour.
So I drove by the other day in rural Tennessee, and there was a sign that said McDonald's was hiring for 20 bucks an hour.
Yeah, I would do it.
What is it about the pool job? Is that the highest job, making 15 bucks an hour?
Honestly, it's my first quote-unquote big girl job. And I've never honestly been paid as much. So yeah, this is the first job that I've been paid this much ever.
Okay. So I want you to hang on the line. I'm going to send you a couple of things. We're going to send you our friend Ken Coleman's book, From Paycheck to Purpose.
Okay.
You're worth more financially than you think. And since this is the first time, and you may not have family members that make a lot of money or make more than 15 bucks an hour, this makes you feel like a million bucks to you. I want you to know that if you're the kind of person who's working two jobs and willing to take on a third one, you're the kind of person I want working for me. That tells me you've got a good work ethic. That means you're worth more than $15 an hour.
The second thing is we're going to send you his GetClear assessment that will point you into a direction of not a job. I don't want you playing the, oh, they're going to pay me 25 cents more an hour. This place will pay me 75 cents more an hour. And you go from a restaurant to a car dealership, to a pool shop. I want you to start asking a question you may have never asked yourself ever, which is, what could I actually do to contribute and make my community a little bit better and help people and make a great living at the same time?
Yeah. And this assessment will dig in and point you into a direction of, man, maybe if I went and got certified in this, or I could go do this right now, this is right down the street. Or my buddy's dad works at this place. It can expand your horizons and make a whole bunch more money. You may not have to take a third job is what we're saying if you increase your dollar amounts where you are now.
Okay.
Liv, you said you were making $4,000 a month, but based on $15 an hour, it's not tracking with me.
What's the plus? $12 an hour in a second job?
So my math may be off, but just to give you like a just straight up number, like my last take-home pay was about $1,011..
Is that for every two weeks?
Yeah.
Okay. So we're talking $15 an hour. You said $4,000 originally, and that made me think you were making almost $50K. So that tells me you have way too much car for your income. This car is going to have to go.
Yeah. It's the first car that I ever bought. And I was really struggling without a car. And I knew that I kind of was maybe making a bad decision with going with the $599 a month car note, not including insurance.
Here's one way to tell. If you're focused on the monthly payment, you can't afford it. Yeah. If we're trying to get the payment lower to afford it. So here's what I would do if I was in your shoes, because this is going to help you get some financial foundation.
If you sold this car, could you sell it for what you paid for it?
Yeah. I've only had it for about like eight months.
Okay. That would be my goal. What you need to do in the meantime is save up some money to get you a beater car, to get you from A to B. That's all we're doing right now. That might be a $5,000 car that you can pay for in cash that you found on Facebook marketplace.
You got it inspected at a local mechanic. They said it checks out. It'll get you a buy for two years.
And Liv, people made fun of me and George for years and years and years for what we drove. And you know what matters? Not at all. Our wives still like us most of the time. Our kids like us.
They didn't marry us for our money. I'll tell you that much.
They're depreciating assets. Nobody cares.
Yeah. No, I agree. It was just, I was going through such a hard time previously before receiving this car that I was like, if I'm going to go get a car and get a note, I want to get something that is close to what I like, but I kind of feel like I made a mistake doing that.
It's okay. Hey, I did the exact same thing at a college. I bought the biggest, dumbest truck I could find.
Because I deserve it. I've been driving this crappy car. I deserve it. It's just, I fell into the traps that George writes about in his new book. Like I just fell for it.
Just hook, line, and sinker.
You deserve freedom. And that means driving this crappy, dumpy car that you paid cash for, and it doesn't have a $600 payment attached. And that helps you get rid of your credit card debt once and for all. Helps you build an emergency fund so that you can be on this other side with no payments, money in the bank, investing for the future. And now you can focus on a job you actually want, because you're not desperate for that next paycheck.
Thank you guys so much.
Doesn't that feel right? Hang on the line here. We'll hook you up. We're gonna get you those things from Ken Coleman, and we're gonna send you a year of FPU, Financial Peace University. I want you to watch all the lessons.
Watch them all.
Especially the one on wise spending that me and John do.
That's right. We tag team back again, a lesson on wise spending. Make sure you check that out. This is the Ramsey Show.
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Welcome back to the Ramsey Show. I'm George Campbell, joined by Dr. John Deloney. this hour. We're taking your calls about money, life, relationships, whatever's on your mind, whatever's keeping you up at night.
We want to talk about it. 888-825-5225..
All right, let's go out to Gabe in Chitown, Chicago, Illinois. What's up, Gabe?
Hi, thank you both for your time today.
You got it, man. Thanks for calling. What's up?
So, my wife and I, we are on baby steps four, five, and six. And, as you know, we're currently living in Chicago, and we bought a condo last year. I'm super happy, but now we're thinking about moving to Florida. We're going to grow. our family, wanted to get closer to my parents and her parents.
And so we're moving to Florida, and we're unsure what to do with our condo. Does it make sense to sell it? Should we rent it? Because we've only had it for about a year and a half, there has been some appraisal value to it, but with agency, we're really not sure what to do here.
Not originally. Our hope is to rent first to see if we like it,
but we're not too sure yet.
No,
no harm at all.
There is a slight increase in terms of the appraisal value. So we're trying to break even. Hopefully that could happen. We're unsure if that's the right move, but with us being able to rent it, it could make sense that eventually down the line, there could be more value in the place, more equity.
It sounds great on paper. Here's what the reality is.
Napkin mask.
You live in Florida, and the HVAC is busted, and now you're trying to deal with this as a long distance landlord with a property you can't even see or deal with. And that part worries me. Because the truth is, if you're living in Florida, you wouldn't go out and buy a condo in Chicago.
And so when you think of it in the reverse, when you reverse, engineer it, you go, yeah, that doesn't make sense. This is a bad move. We're going to take the, we're going to break even. This is not going to be a money-making scheme. It was never meant to be.
And renting this place out may not be the best thing for our financial future right now.
Or let's take the HVAC off the table, because that's when you can call an HVAC company. Let's say you get tenants, and they're super trustworthy. And then the husband goes over to his buddy's house and ends up in an essential oils pyramid scheme. And then he watches a video on all the mold in the house in Chicago. And then suddenly he develops a cough, and he calls you and says, my house is covered up in mold, and we demand that you remediate the whole house.
And I have to have a hotel for me and my wife, or a rental house.
And you're covering medical costs as well.
And you're like, well, I need to go in there and see it. So now either you're hiring somebody to come out and do that, who may have a vested interest in finding mold, or you got to get on a plane. See how dumb this is to sell the house? And I'll say this, this is probably not the best on paper. Again, math is mostly a psychology issue.
I mean, not math, money is mostly a psychology issue. I've written a check on one house. I went to closing with several thousand dollars because when you factored in realtor fees, we were a little bit upside down, like three or 4,000 bucks. I wrote a check because the long-term financial benefit to me was in my favor. And so on paper, you're like, you lost money on a house?
Yep, I did. I lived in it less than 12 months. I wrote a check on it, and then I was able to transform my family. So I mean, I, just, that extra baggage of having a house a bunch of states over just doesn't seem worth it to me.
The other option is, could you live in it six more months and hit that two-year mark?
Yeah, why do you want to move all of a sudden?
Yeah, I guess that's another thing that's in our favor. There's no rush. We, once again, want to start a family. We want to get closer to our family, but we're both remote, so we don't have to leave right now. We can just be patient.
Great, but yeah, no immediate rush.
I'd stick it out through the Chicago winter and just go, all right, Florida's on the other side, but right now we're going to hang tight. And you can have a baby in Chicago, I found out. They have like hospitals there and stuff.
My wife and I had a bunch of plans. She went to grad school, then I went to grad school, then she got her tenure track job, and then I got my administrative job. And we had mapped it out, and now we're going to have a family. And then we didn't get pregnant, and then another year went by, and then another year went by. And so the best laid plans, right?
I mean, so you can have all the plans in the world. I wouldn't rush something just to rush it.
You know what I mean?
And I know you can feel the burden, like, should we keep paying on this house, on this condo, then, if we're going to sell it someday? Yeah, maybe, but the number of times people call this show and they say, hey, I was doing something for six months, and it's seven years later, is regularly, okay? It's just the way life works. So I would sell it when we moved, and I wouldn't rush the move, if you just absolutely don't have to. But that's just my two cents.
Just two guys. That's right.
All right, let's go out to Tampa, where Gabe really wants to be living. Let's go out to Tampa and talk to Caden. What's up, Caden?
Hey, can you hear me? Yeah, we got you, man. What's up? How's it going? Partying, dude.
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