Armchair Anonymous: Meet Cute

Welcome, welcome, welcome to Armchair Anonymous. I'm Dax, Randall Shepard. I'm joined by Monica Lilly Padman.

Armchair Anonymous.

Armchair Anonymous, a word that gives me anxiety every time I try to spell it. Every time I try to spell Anonymous, I can't find the gear in the transmission. I'm like A-N-what? I know. there's a Y in there.

Okay, maybe a hack is, if you think of it, as a non, if you shortened it to a non.

Okay, star of cereal? That's ad-non.

That's ad-non. If you do a non for short, then you know a non doesn't have a Y, right? So you know that would come after.

Great.

So then first you spell a non.

Yes. I love this workshop you're giving me.

No, that's gonna sound bad. A-N-O-N.

I put some tissue in my nose to try to make Monica laugh and throw her off her game, as I always try to do, because I'm like working with an eight year old.

You are.

I wish I had balls to throw at you.

Oh, my God. Yeah.

Oh my God. Or I should get one of those toy boyoneros with the little suction cups at the end and just launch them at you while we do this. Okay.

Okay.

All right.

I'm trying to teach. This is what you were like as a student.

Probably.

Oh, wow.

Yeah, sorry. He's got a glimpse. My poor teachers.

First you spell a non.

A non. Yeah, I can do that.

Spell it. A-N-O-N. Perfect. Now you know you got that out of the way. Now you add the Y.

Now I add the Y. Y-M-O-U-S.

That's right.

Really? Anonymous. Yeah.

And it's like Y, like if it's in Spanish. E.

Oh, E. Anonymous. Okay, I did a great job.

You did. We don't need extra.

We don't need extra stuff.

Extra stuff.

What if this prompt was tell us about a word you have a hard time spelling? And we got all four guessing in under like three minutes.

Oh, my God.

This is MeCutes. MeCutes. By popular demand, MeCutes. MeCute. And they were cute.

They are. This is really sweet.

They warm this Grinch heart of mine.

Good. Yeah. Three sizes.

I really liked them. 1.5.. Oh wow. Batiste, he had already 4X'd it, so there was only so far it could go.

Oh, that's good. Yeah. So now it's all the way.

It's all the way. And you can listen to all these. The word penis is used. If that's too much for you, then this isn't for you. But other than that, this is real, safe and sweet.

It's lovely. Yeah.

Please enjoy MeCutes.

♪ Hard times come and go ♪.

♪ Good times, take them slow. ♪. ♪ My life, I had them both. ♪. ♪ Whoever wants it, you gotta know ♪.

♪ I'ma keep on shining ♪.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi.

I love how many stuffies you have. in your background. I see four.

Yeah, this is Henry's room. Henry is my sister's toy poodle. So this is his little enclave under the staircase.

Hold on, hold on, hold on.

Those are all the dog stuffies?

Yeah.

Wow, he's so spoiled.

Yeah, yeah.

I know. You should see his closet. Oh! He has a closet? Jealous.

Wow, Henry.

So Nazzy, what a fun name. How on earth did your parents come up with that?

It's actually Nazzy. It's short for Nazgul. It's a Persian name. It means cute flower. But I think just growing up in LA and just having substitute teachers butcher my name constantly, I was kind of scarred.

Oh, I like Nazzy. It's very cute.

Well, cute flower.

Cute, which is the topic today. That's right. Meet cute, ding, ding, ding, ding. So you have a meet cute story.

I do. So this story takes place in transit because I was traveling when it happened, but I was living in Brooklyn and I was going to my friend's wedding in Michigan. I went to college in Michigan. Yeah, and these were my two best friends from college. I was really excited to see them get married.

Oh, I'm already sad. I couldn't wait to hear about you and the 60 year old.

Yeah, sorry about that. We start having normal, plain, small talk. He's telling me about how he's from Long Island. He's recently divorced. He starts talking about his dating life and his sex life and he's into younger woman and it gets really uncomfortable really quickly and I'm trying to sort of divert the situation and sort of ignore him, and he just keeps trying.

Oh, no.

This is impossible.

Story gets more impossible.

Oh great.

So I'm like, cool, I'll just try to avoid this person all weekend. It's fine. I like hop in my rental car, pick up my friend. We drive to the wedding, have an incredible time. Sunday morning, I'm ruthlessly hungover, exiting out of my room and I see a creepy dude standing outside my door, like leaning on the railing.

I like you like 10 times more now. I just want you to know. Now that that detail's out, I immediately like you 10 times more.

I figured.

What pills are we mixing in with the booze? I just need to kind of know what your vibe is.

Yeah, amphetamines.

Okay, great.

And so I get to the gate and I'm waiting and then I see the creepy dude is sitting at the bar. I'm like, crap, he's also gonna be on my flight back. What in the world? So I'm kind of just tucked away in the corner and then, like in my periphery, I see a tall, not six, four tall, but tall regardless gentleman with really pretty green eyes. And we're like kind of exchanging glances, but I'm on high alert and not really in the mood to flirt right now.

You have a stalker within view.

Yeah, the wall is up. And then I look him up and down and I look at his shoes, and I just don't like his shoes. He has these orange running shoes and he's wearing them with jeans, and I was 25.. That's how you immediately judge a guy, you look at their shoes.

Although orange is fun and playful and bold.

Now it would be cool and in.

He was ahead of his time.

He was ahead of his time, exactly. Yeah, how long ago was this? This was in 2017.. I'm boarding the flight. I get to my row, which is row 17, and somebody's sitting in my seat, which was 17A.

Oh.

So now I'm like intrigued. I'm forgetting about the ugly shoes.

How's his face?

It's really nice. It's tan. It's like a little bit angular. He's got some salt and peppery finishes in his hair. They're like older, but not like 60s.

Ooh, nice, okay.

Monty's sweet spot.

Yeah, I love that. Yeah, exactly. So then I'm on this flight and we have a layover in Detroit. Everybody going to back to New York has a layover in Detroit. So I'm just in a daze thinking manically, okay, like what do I do?

Oh, the creepy guy is within earshot as well.

Yes.

It's a love triangle now, okay.

I hope it's his dad.

No, it's not his dad. That would be weird now, because I'm still dating this guy. Yes. I'm just like, okay, let me just go to the most crowded place I can think of. Obviously, it's the airport bar.

Wow. Oh, my Lord.

We're both at really small weddings. Like don't remember seeing each other. We quickly find out they were just different weddings in the same small town in Michigan on the same weekend. With the same name.

What?

No. That's a big glitch. That's a very big glitch. Yeah. Oh, my God.

Well, he's busy.

Yeah, I guess.

Well, I have to thank him because it did lead me to the person I'm still with.

Yeah.

Well, yeah, because now you guys have a mystery in your laps. You're like, wait, we were at the same wedding but we didn't see each other and it was small. How is this possible? I mean, it must take you a long time to realize it's two different people with the exact same name.

It didn't take that long. It took a few minutes. Okay, all right, well. But then it got even weirder because we were both from New York, but like, not only were we both from New York, we lived in the same neighborhood. We went to the same gym.

How did you end up dating this woman?

So it started like that. And we slowly started dating and sparks were flying. and we've been together ever since. That was six and a half years ago. And he's amazing.

How long ago was that?

I got sober in 2019 of July. So it's been like four and a half years.

Oh, wow, you, okay. So within your first year of sobriety, you were doing COVID in quarantine.

Yeah, it was not good.

Yeah. That's hard.

That's a tricky.

It was really hard.

Well, congrats. That's incredible.

Thank you, yeah. And I wanted to thank you guys so much. I know a lot of people have like a really deep connection to this podcast, and I obviously do. for that reason. And also in sobriety, I discovered a lot about my mental health that I didn't know before.

Oh, my God, it's so flattering. It's crazy. It really is. I'm so happy for you. What shoes is he wearing now?

Oh, yeah.

Because obviously they'll be super cool in three years and maybe I can be ahead.

Right now he's wearing high top bluish gray Vans.

That sounds cute. Okay.

Yeah, they're cute. I'm not very far off from that. I have now been really gone back to my leather Converse. Right? With my Beckham style.

He was probably in his workout shoes too that day.

At the airport.

But in jeans.

He forgot. or maybe, you know, often this happens where you have to wear the wrong shoe on the plane because it's the bulky issue.

Oh, right. It won't fit in your bag. Yep. That's true. I've done that.

Oh, yeah. That makes sense. Maybe that's what it was.

Tiny silhouette, like a slip on that went into the bag.

That's right. Yeah. That would have been cuter with the jeans, but he had to make a sacrifice.

I like this. meet cute. I was against it, but now I really like it.

Oh, you were against it because you wanted to be the stalker, right?

No, no, no. Just remember the heading itself. Meet cute. I was apprehensive about it. And now I'm admitting that I really like it.

Okay. Great.

Well, it's super nice meeting you and I'm really delighted to hear the story. And I'm so, so happy for you.

Yeah, congratulations.

Found sobriety.

Oh, thank you so much.

All right. Well, great meeting you and congrats to that dog with that incredible environment. Henry. Good job.

He's an arm cherry too.

Then he deserves all of those stuffies.

He does. He does.

Exactly.

All right.

Bye.

Take care.

Maybe I'll have a meet cute during this.

Oh my God. Here comes Kate. That's how you know right away. K-A-Y-T-E. Or Katie.

Could be Katie.

K-A-T-E? K-A-T-E? I'm just gonna put a little spin on things. We prize individuality in this country. Hi.

I introduced myself, Katie, but a lot of people call me Kate, and I'm totally fine with that too.

No, I wanted to call you Katie. But never seen it spelled this way. Such an exciting spelling.

Yeah, thank you. My dad made it up. He did.

Dads like to do this kind of shit, right?

They do, yeah.

Where are you at? Are you in a pink tent?

I am in my daughter's pink tent.

Oh, fun. And where are you at in the country?

I am in the Southwest suburbs of Chicago.

Right.

How old are you? If you don't mind me asking.

No, I don't mind you asking. I'm 31..

Were you afraid she was a minor?

You look so young.

Oh, I do?

Yes, congratulations.

Oh, to have a daughter with a tent?

Exactly. Yes. I was trying to piece together. I was like, how? Cause you look 18..

She's only three.

Still, still. But if you were 18, that would mean you had her at 15.. Which is great. Which would be an early start. You could likely have great grandchildren by 50..

Wow. On that trajectory.

Okay, you have a meet cute story and we're dying to hear it.

Okay, great. So, Monica, we're relatively similar in age. So I hope you know of this game or maybe even played it, and then I'll be a little bit less embarrassed.

Okay.

Do you guys remember, or have you ever heard of the penis game?

I remember the penis game.

In the early, like 2000s, 2010s, when you would just like yell.

Oh, yes.

Penis. At like increasing volumes in a public space to see who would respond.

I'm so sad. I never was somewhere when someone was playing it.

This was a common game.

I would love this.

It also happened in school.

Yes, yes, definitely. Which is where mine takes place. So I was in college, up in Wisconsin, and my girlfriends and I thought on a Saturday night that it would be hilarious to play this game out of one of their apartment windows. And we would just take turns yelling penis, going up to the window, yelling it. And, as you can imagine, most people were walking by just like ignoring us or being like, ha, ha, ha, you know cause we're very immature.

Or getting aroused, aren't the boys getting aroused? I don't think so.

It's not sexy so much.

For me, if I'm walking on the street. God, that organic chemistry exams coming up. I don't wanna, penis. And I look over and there's a cute girl going, penis. I'm like, oh my God, does she want some penis?

Okay, okay, I can see how it would be sexy.

That's just one scenario that could have played out.

Yeah, makes sense.

Well, you're not too far off.

Oh, no.

Oh, no.

I'll cut all of that.

Okay, so it was my turn and I walk over the window. mind you, we're like two or three stories up. You can just see kind of shadows walking by, but all of a sudden I just see this big group of what looked like a bunch of college bros walking by. And I just yell penis at the top of my lungs, penis.

Yeah, I like this girl. She's yelling penis out the window and she doesn't have a beard. She's probably drinking a little bit. You have a little beer?

Probably no, if I'm being honest.

Dog pilling is a gas.

That's what I'm here to do. Color commentary.

I was definitely what you would consider a good girl. So my girlfriend then starts shouting my phone number out to him.

Oh, okay, she's gonna wingman you, yeah.

I get a couple of text messages that night and they're like, we're at this bar, come out.

And I didn't want to be like, I'm not 21,.

so I'm just playing it off like, yeah, maybe another time, you know? So then I save the number in my phone as vagina and then kind of forgot about it. You know, we just moved on with our lives. Months go by and I get a text message from vagina. And it was like, hey, we're going to these bars tonight, come out.

Now, really quick, were you afraid to say, I can't go to the bar, I'm 19?. Were you trying to keep your age a secret?

Or you felt it was embarrassing?

I was just kind of a little embarrassed. Like most people, I feel like had a fake ID.

Had their shit together for college, yeah.

And so I just thought, well, if I tell them this, then what if they think I'm lame? But then, as we started texting, then I told him, stop asking me to go to the bars, I can't go to the bars. A few days go by and we were kind of texting on and off and he was super nice. And so I was like, huh, I wonder. Then I'm talking to my girlfriend, Emily.

He's a good guy.

You can go out with him. Whoa.

And I was like, oh, okay.

Well, that makes me feel more comfortable. Then we set up a date, and we've been together ever since.

And you have a little three year old baby together?

Yeah, so we've been together for 11 years, married for six.

Oh, my gosh. Was Tom your first boyfriend?

Kind of.

Like serious.

The only one I count, really.

Uh, huh. Oh, this is terribly sweet. It started so dirty, but it ended up being so sweet.

Very sweet.

Yeah, you guys were screaming genitalia at each other, and then it turned out to be so, gee.

We're both pretty conservative, so it's pretty startling, I think, for some people to hear that came out of both of us. Yeah.

Did he have a fake ID or was he two years older than you?

He was two years older. Or is two years older.

Wow, you just start by shouting out.

It's what we call putting yourself out there.

Yeah.

You just put yourself out there.

Wow. Yeah, so, Monica, these last few dates haven't worked out. Just another suggestion.

Open your window. Invite Callie over so she can scream your phone number.

Yeah, I need some more people.

Katie, that's a very sweet story. I'm very happy you guys have this little baby.

This is lovely. These are the stories that make you feel encouraged.

about the world. They're antidotes to couples therapy.

And antidotes to piercing and tattoos.

Yes, that's true. This is cleansing.

And we do have another baby on the way, too.

Oh, my gosh, congratulations.

Thank you. Is it okay if I give one quick shout out to my girlfriend, Tara?

Yes, please.

We've both been listening since day one and text very regularly about episodes, so just wanted to tell her I love her and it's so fun to listen with her. And she also went to school with us, too.

She saw the evolution of Tom. That's right. That's so fun.

Well, shout out to her.

And can I just say one more thing? Monica, when you were talking recently about your grandpa unsynced, so my grandfather had Alzheimer's. He was diagnosed at 64.. And so he lived, unfortunately, for a very long time with it. And it's so hard.

Aw. Aw.

That's lovely. Aw.

Yeah, that's a really special thing to remember.

Katie Thomas, so lucky. Yeah. Yeah.

It's actually a fake name because we're so conservative,

we didn't even want people to know our penis story.

Oh, my God, you guys are so sweet.

That's fine. Tom, AKA fucking whatever. Vagina. Tom, you're going to be next to Tom. Vagina's, so lucky.

Yeah. Yes, lovely. Thank you. Thank you for that. That was really sweet and needed.

You're welcome. Thinking of you guys. Well, thank you so much for all you do. This show has got me through a lot of tough times. I'm a stay-at-home mom now, which wasn't planned, but just life happened during COVID, and I get kind of bored.

We are going to keep you busy.

Yeah, yeah. You do. We just keep turning up the heat. Well, Katie, it's so nice to meet you. Thanks for telling us that lovely story.

I almost said I love you. You know when you say, but I love you.

Yeah, I almost said it too.

Yeah.

She was so sweet.

I know. So many people are in relationships.

Yeah, it's pretty common. About half the people, probably.

Really interesting to think about that.

Is it? It's nice.

People find their people. Yeah.

It's lovely. Yeah, they team up. People team up. People team up. It's crazy.

Yeah.

I was thinking, or were we just talking about that? Oh yeah, we were. We were talking about you yesterday. in the fact. check.

The chocolate chip.

How tiny your trusted group was. Let's talk to Phillip.

Chocolate chip.

Penis.

It was a fun game.

Oh, Phillip's being assisted.

That's my assistant. She doubles as my daughter.

I can't wait till mine's old enough to be my assistant.

Yeah, it's really cool. And then, when they're old enough, they definitely make sure you're politically correct. I have to say, I really appreciate it.

How else would you learn?

I encourage them to get me hip.

Right. I love that. Are you a musician, Phillip?

Yes. I'm a composer. Oh. I'm Emmy nominated, but, as my son likes to say, I'm an Emmy loser.

Oh, that's nice of him. That's another service they can provide.

Congratulations, Emmy nominated.

Yes. Thanks, that's nice of you. You both look beautiful.

Right back at you. You're very handsome. Okay, you have a meet cute story.

I do. So. as you've noticed, I'm a composer and I went to Berkeley College of Music in Boston. Everybody gets that mixed up.

Yeah, explain that. Why did they name it Berkeley?

The guy's name was Lee Burke. So it's spelled B-E-R-K-L-E-E.

Okay, so basically it's the person's name, but as if they were on a roll call.

Kind of. It actually causes more confusion than anything else, because everybody thinks it's Berkeley, Northern California. Right.

By the way, if you're gonna get confused, for a school, not a bad one. No. Like if you went to Stanford Vocational School for Diesel Mechanics.

If it does me any good, I'll just let them think it's Northern California. So I went there for four years, got a degree in music composition.

What year was this?

Let's just say it was a while ago. I never thought this was kind of an ageist business,

but- You're feeling that.

A little bit, it can be, because I also produce singer-songwriters, and until they hear that I can lay down a groove, they look at me with suspicion, like how hip can this guy be?

I understand. It's a heat-seeking business we're all in. Yeah, that's a good way to put it. We all want the next hottest, best thing.

Exactly. So I went there and then stayed another three years just touring in bands, saving money. I'm from Ohio. So I leave Boston. I saw a car in a cornfield in Ohio.

I've bought several from fields.

It was a Mustang hatchback, 1974.. Oh, wow. $2,500..

Beautiful.

I just put everything in that, moved to LA. Fortunately, the neighbor next to me, where we shared a wall, which that'll be another episode. We can share some of those stories. But she worked for a music publishing company. The way music publishing companies work is they'll have staff writers that write songs and they'll pitch those songs to recording artists that are selling millions of records.

They own half of the then recording. You got it.

I got this gig. My neighbor found out I could listen to music and write it out. I could transcribe it. So remember cassette tapes?

Yeah.

She would bring these cassette tapes home. I would transcribe a song, stay up all night, handed the music in for her to take to work in the morning. And they liked the quick turnaround. And so I paid my rent for years that way. Nice.

That's a neat side, hustle.

It was great. So when you're transcribing something, you're kind of weeding it back and forth. Wait, is that a B flat? No, that's a B natural. So by the time you've transcribed something, you're so inside of it.

Yeah, that makes sense.

I would listen to these singers writing the melody down. And there was one singer in particular that was just like, wow. It was MCA Publishing. They had several studio singers. But every time this singer would sing something, I would kind of forget that.

You were mesmerized by this singer.

Completely mesmerized. I started feeling like she was singing to me. Sure, sure, sure.

And have you created a mental picture of what she looks like at this point?

Yeah, this is before Facebook or social media, anything like that. Now, here's the part I guess I'm not that proud of, but you're both so open.

Yeah, you can say anything. I know.

I feel safe. Good. I was living with a girlfriend.

Different woman, yes. Sure, sure, sure.

This happens.

Love isn't always tidy. No. That's right.

Rarely tidy.

That's right. It doesn't work out that way.

It's a messy business.

And by the way, we're still friends.

Okay, yeah.

I'll just use everybody's name. So I would say to Mary, God, I love this singer.

Yes.

And she would say, yes, me too.

Oh, wow, okay, yeah.

That went on for quite a while, like over a year. Wow. But it started becoming like, it didn't matter to me if she had an eye in the center of her forehead. I'm not kidding. Yes.

Yes.

It was just like, I want to have little baby cyclopses with you.

Yes, sure, sure.

I would say, yeah, I love her. And Mary would say, yes, me too. But in my mind, I'm thinking, I think it's starting to take on a little different meaning. Wow.

This is kind of like the movie, Her.

Oh, yes.

Where he's falling in love with the AI voice.

That's a good point.

And he's falling deeply in love.

My daughter told me not to use the word stalker, but I was like.

Well, let's back up. Again, you're not going to give the year of your graduation, but you bought a 74 Mustang, you're using tapes. We know the era. And look, I'm not that far off of that. And things were fucking different, because you couldn't reach out to somebody with a text.

Or DM, none of that. No, no, no.

You had to show up in person. Like, it's inherently with stalkery because you had to show up uninvited to make the introduction. There was no soft way to do it.

Correct. And my neighbor, Debbie, she kind of knew, because I was constantly asking questions about this singer, whose name is Karen Blake, and tell me about her. Debbie kind of knew, like, okay, I could feel you've got a little crush happening here. And so I knew that Debbie was inviting Karen over one Saturday. Oh boy.

Sure, sure.

My apartment. Debbie has her door open and I hear these footsteps coming up the stairs. And so I could hear Debbie greeting Karen. So what I did was I took the last thing I had transcribed of Karen's and I put it on my stereo and, like, cranked it to 11.. Okay.

Sure, sure.

For like 10 full seconds and turned it off and I could kind of hear them laughing. So I went over there and she was, and still is, incredibly beautiful.

Exceeded your mental picture you had created? Beyond. Oh, wow.

Yeah, well, he had a cyclops.

Well, that's true. Expectations were low.

Totally hot. I just thought, I just had to be myself and now I have to kind of tell it slightly from my wife's perspective. And she said, from Karen's perspective, and she said, it was love at first sight.

Oh, wow. Had she been briefed on you at all?

I think she knew that this guy had a little crush on her.

Yeah, okay.

But guess what? She had a boyfriend too.

Oh, this is so off and how it is.

She said it was love at first sight for her. For me it was, I don't know what you'd call it, love at first. listen. Yeah. Yeah, sure.

Time together. Yes.

You can figure out how old I am, because we've been married 40 years. And we have two great adult kids. They inherited their mom's singing ability.

Oh, that's the hope over here as well.

My son is such a prolific songwriter. It's like, you, motherfucker.

Wow.

You know, I had to work so hard. He just has it so quickly. We do have fun when we make music together. And we do this little thing where we all jam in our cozy little kitchen and we'll just put up an iPhone. We post them.

For civilians? Yeah. Yeah.

For a civilian, right. Yeah. Exactly. I so feel like I married up and I'm really lucky.

I can feel it, Bella.

Yeah. That's really lovely.

I can feel your love too, Dax, for your wife. Yeah. And it's very similar. Like, we're so lucky, man.

Well, when you admire someone, it's really helpful.

I swear, and she does sing for me a lot.

Do you cry? I cry.

Well, I get misty-eyed sometimes.

Yeah, same. Yeah, yeah.

And it's just like, I can't believe I get to go to bed with you tonight.

Yeah.

How lucky am I, man?

I think everyone won. Mutual. The kids won. Karen won. Philip won.

Yeah, and, by the way, our two other significant others, they're completely happy in their lives.

I wish they would've got together, and then they're our next call.

Like Shania Twain. She got together with the husband of the woman. her husband cheated with. Right. Very interesting.

That's very civil. Yeah, it is.

It's clean. Let's just do-si-do and keep it moving. Well, Philip, it's really nice meeting you. That's such a sweet story.

You guys are beautiful, and your stock value in our house is really high.

Ooh, this is good. Your house seems like a really good, safe port in a storm.

I agree.

Yeah, it's safe here.

Yeah, it looks like it. Oh, here comes your-. Oh, there she is. Oh, the woman of the hour. Wow.

I'm not a complete idiot. I did that. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Get in here.

Emmett, come around. Oh my gosh, we're gonna get Emmett, too. What a beautiful family. Oh, my God. Look at these.

Look at these gorgeous children.

We thought it might be a meet cute. Monica, let's snatch up this young lad right here.

He's talented. I know, I know it.

He's available.

Oh, my God. How old are you? She'll send over a demo.

Monica, are you a vocalist, too?

No, God, no, unfortunately.

But she is a good singer. She just doesn't do it out. Like, he's out. This is good.

Oh, I like-.

He's aloof.

I like when they leave.

It makes me want more. Sorry, they left.

Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.

Oh my gosh. He left because he didn't know we were talking about you dating him. He didn't have headphones on.

How old is he?

He's 24..

Oh, that's a little bit rough. That's a pretty big age gap.

Somebody will be very happy.

Yeah, someone's gonna be lucky as hell. But it won't be this old, Gail. Okay. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.

He's six, seven.

He's gorgeous.

Oh, this is painful.

Look, you can have a fling, a Christmas fling.

No, he doesn't deserve that. Oh, he does.

This old lady. He likes flings.

No, no, he's open to it.

All right. Get back here. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Get back in here.

He's such a dad.

He doesn't have headphones? No, he's down for this.

Wow, you're so handsome.

Oh my God, six, seven. Mom, give him the headphones for one second, so he knows what we're saying.

Oh man, I feel.

Six, seven. Six, seven. Oh, my God, and you sing?

Six, seven with the voice of gold.

I pretend to.

No, no. I would love to share something with you. It's really, and that's the thing. He's just sitting on a mountain of stuff. He's kind of figuring out what he wants to do and he's not releasing it.

If I were him, I would look in a fucking mirror for the rest of my life.

Oh my God, he's humble too?

I know, but I would just stare at myself in the mirror if I look like this guy. Wow. Wow, wow, wow.

Great hair too.

What do you think, Monica? Come on.

Let's go for an evening out.

Maybe there's a number exchange.

Yes. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.

Let's go out on the town.

Me too, number two.

Let's do it.

Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. All right, we'll email everyone. This has been so fun, you guys.

Really, really great sharing with you guys.

Yes, right back at you. Great meeting, everybody. Bye. All right, take care. Bye.

Whoa, are your pants exploding?

Yeah, they're unbuttoned. 24.. Wow, that's okay for just a nice, fun weekend.

24 is really a lot younger than me.

At six, seven, that's like 30.. Oh, is that how it works? Yeah, you do add two years for every inch over six, four. Wow.

For a lot of that, if we hadn't seen the daughter, I would have bet money that he was Billie Eilish's dad.

That would have made sense.