Disrespectfully - Do It For The Plot | Episode 5

Welcome to Disrespectfully, with Katie Maloney and Dana Kathan. Unapologetically, we're here to do what we want to do, spilling the tea. Babe, you're going to see the power of women, like Disrespectfully.

I'm happy to be back here and not at home.

Are you well?

I'm well, you know, relatively speaking. I'm always well.

I mean, we'd love to see it. I'm at a 25% right now.

25?

I'm pretty unwell because I'm an idiot and was out until the wee hours of the morning on Sunday, after I had originally planned to go to bed at 8.

I never like to see the sunrise.

Oh, it's dark stuff.

There's, it really is.

Birds were chirping. No. When we were leaving, and I was like, they're so hostile right now.

No, I don't want to see the sunrise, unless I've just awoke.

Right. It's a different thing when you're waking up and you're like, this is a refreshing day. It feels like Barbie land. You just get up in the morning and like this.

No. No, when you've been out all night and then that sun starts creeping up. Yeah. Dark stuff. Okay.

Yeah, it was pretty devastating. I won't be doing that again for quite a while. So I sound bad. I feel bad. But, you know, we're here.

I know. I wanted to go buck wild this past week after being indoors just alone. I was like ready to go crazy.

Well, another thing is this weekend I expected to be more chill because I was in New York last weekend. Right. And for Ariana's big debut.

How.

It was.

Everything.

So wonderful. But first of all, also New York, it was a very quick trip. So when I'm there, I want to maximize my time. So we did a lot in a very short amount. So I was like, I get home from a trip and I unpack that evening.

No. Sometimes I do and I'm always grateful that I do. But most times I don't. I respect that people do that, but I also think it's kind of insane when people come home from a trip. Like, I'm tired.

Oh, it's very unhinged behavior. I'm aware, but I don't like to see my suitcase. I literally pop it open, start the laundry, reorganize, and then I usually get in bed.

It does mock you, the longer it sits there.

Oh, it was hostile. It was basically heckling me every time I walked in my kitchen. I'm like, why? I don't even like a single dish in the sink. And there's just a whole suitcase, and I was just walking over it.

Wow.

In the sky.

Like, how high are we talking?

I probably missed that day of school as far as being able to measure heights. But I would say it was like 20 feet. Wow, okay.

Does that sound crazy? And they don't hook in?

No. I mean, she climbed it in front of us and was just up there. So, yeah, she seemed very comfortable. very quickly. The crowd was super rowdy.

I would say maybe like six, seven?

Yeah, I was a virgin. So I got my first Playbill, which I have. Ariana, I'm sorry. I got pizza grease on it when I got home. But I'm still keeping it because it's a relic.

She's on the cover.

She's on the cover. And then I open it, and they have, like the cast bios. And she was the first one. I started bawling. When she came on, I started crying.

I know. I was not one of them. You were missed. As much as I wanted to. It's like I am trying to minimize my amount of travel because I know I have a lot coming up and a lot of probably unexpected travel is going to pop up.

She's doing eight shows a week.

Yeah.

For the next eight weeks. Yeah. She's going to get more comfortable and it's going to be amazing. But yeah, she's thriving.

I know. It was really wonderful to see.

And we walked one morning because I wanted to see the Times Square. Olive Garden, because I've never paid attention to it. Olive Garden, can you please get over yourself and sponsor us? We love you. Biggest fans.

Serendipitous. I love that.

I think that had something to do with it. So we knew it was going to be a good time. And after we went to a very fun gay bar that reminded me of beaches in WeHo. It kind of gave that energy. And we got a little rowdy and I had to leave for my flight at eight in the morning.

Just traveling when you're hungover period is not the ideal at all.

I do have to give a shout out to Sheena, because I sat next to her and her mom on the flight back. And technically I was in the middle seat and she did give me the window because I was not doing well. And a pillow to try and sleep.

So you were going to sit between her and her mom?

Uh-huh.

Well, I'm that bitch that when I travel anyway, especially if it's three hours or under, I don't care. But if I'm going to New York, I'm going to sit in first class. With the time change and the length of flight, I have to be comfortable. I can't sleep on a plane, but I need to at least try to make myself cozy.

That's actually one of the things I'm manifesting. I'd like to travel first class just all the time. I'd love it. I will say that morning I looked because I was so unwell. I was like, I will throw any amount of money at this problem to be able to.

JetBlue Mint is.

I wish the flight is longer. when I'm in Mint. I'm like, can we do another few laps? It's luxurious in here. And there was nothing available, so I shot myself in the foot.

It's worth it. It's worth the ticket price.

It is worth it. I mean, and it's totally a luxury. But again, it's just like you got to dream big, and that's why I'd like to be...

If you can arrive at your destination feeling like relaxed. Refreshed. Yeah, you haven't been cramped in a middle seat. Just do it.

We did the Comfort Plus or whatever, and that for Europe, is the bare minimum. Like it worked out. Like our short flights between countries, it was fine. But that... Yeah, those long flights.

Yeah, no. It's part of the trip getting there. So like why... I don't know, I can't say. Yeah, anyway.

So anyway, I got home, I was drained and then I had just as bad of an Uber ride home at.

It was a big.

Congratulations.

It was crazy. I enjoyed the premiere episode.

Highlights. Tell me what you thought about it.

I just think, you know, it was a good sort of like little catch-up to see where everyone's at. Obviously, it was like 3-4 months post-Skandoval, but also like there's still some like residual stuff there. People trying to figure out how they're feeling about everything. And, you know, I just... I think it was received pretty well.

I thought it was great. I thought it was a great catch-up and start to the season. And can we talk about my favorite moment from the episode?

Sure.

Your face.

Oh, the french fries?

As you were eating the french fries when Lala told Ariana she had reached out to Raquel.

Yeah. Okay, to be honest, I feel like I was like on another planet during that whole like girls' night scene, because that feel-free shot that I had at Tom's when he's like, Oh, do you want to try one of these? And I was like, Oh, Kava Root, I always have. Those are not for a faint heart. I never had one of those before.

No, I don't even know what is that.

Kava Root, it's like a root whatever drink, and it's.

Can you? just, you buy it at a regular store?

You can buy it at 7-Eleven.

Maybe we should slam a couple before the next episode. Couple?

I won't. even, I'm like on a half, like I'll drink half that thing. A full thing is crazy in my opinion. I don't know. People apparently are getting addicted to them, but...

I mean your blood is 50% Celsius, so that's surprising to me to hear that.

I am just like Celsius personified.

What else did you have for breakfast?

I had Girl Scout cookies.

She brought in Girl Scout cookies like a real angel. And we had those.

What else happened in Vanderpump Rules? Oh, the Toms. The Toms interview? On the biofiles.

The biofiles? The art media company owner?

Shit show.

Oh, my God. I mean there's so much to cover on that, so I don't know, you start.

I mean the first part of it, just Schwartz sitting there apologizing for Tom, for being late or possibly not showing. It was just kind of like, this man, this is what he's signed up for. This is what he's hitched his wagon to, is just being a Tom Sandoval apologist. And you know, I just, to me. it's just really kind of sad, if you will.

It was, I mean, I guess, not shocking, because that's how I would predict that an interview such as that would go. Yeah,

I don't know why I'm constantly surprised, because it's like, did I expect any different? No,

but here we are. But it was shocking. And first of all, I love that Nick kept in Tom's tardiness, because that was unhinged to me. First of all, he made several different excuses, right? He was like, oh, I was up crying last night, so I didn't get any sleep, so I didn't come in.

How could he have not got there till 8.

But also does it excuse your bad behavior? if someone else, let's just say he did do that. There's no reason. Why are you bringing that up? You're late today here.

He loves like whenever, like someone's bringing the hammer down on him, he's like, okay, what about like? you're back in 2012?? It's like, how about in the now? How about we're talking about today?

What you did.

What you did today. We're not talking about what somebody did 10, 12 years ago.

He's like, remember when you jaywalked in 2002?

No one's saying anyone's perfect. We're just trying to get to the bottom of why you're late, dude. Oh,

and he was getting mad. And I'm like, you're getting mad and defensive because you're wrong. And Nick, honestly, master class chef's kiss. He killed it the way he interviewed him. But yeah, it was just like, he is capable of saying, like, I was wrong.

Yeah.

What are you talking about?

No. When he started talking about that, I'm like, I, I genuinely got confused. Cause I was like, what is he on about? When it's her? interviews, like this doesn't even make sense.

He thinks accountability is saying, I know I was wrong, but, but just like an apology, someone says, I'm sorry, but you made me do that. That is not an apology. That's not accountability.

He's king of the qualifiers. He wants to qualify everything.

That's my point about both him and Rachel. Just say, I'm sorry, point blank. Nothing else needs to be said. Nothing else needs to be said. Also, what was with the cake?

that being his like breaking point. Why was the lady Jane?

Why does it, was that his favorite cake? Was that?

No, like putting Santa was a liar on a cake.

You are a liar.

It was like that. And then, like the, the white nail polish, I think it was like a magazine or something. That's what he wrote about. And he was like really angry about that. Like of all the things,

I mean,

I just think it speaks to the house and he's talking about like how, like in his parents, divorce, like they, one of them kept the house and an Ariana's parents divorce. One of them kept the house. It's like,

why are you comparing apples to oranges? I know that fruits are hard. I know you don't get it, but it doesn't matter what happened in anyone else's situation. Oh. And Nick asked the best question.

Well, she's supposed to say like, no, I think I'm, I think I've already taken enough. I'm, I'm going to start saying no to things like, are you insane? If the roles were reversed, I can only imagine how insane it would be.

That really gets me the way that he thinks that he deserves that. And he, and then he'll be like, well, he was like, no, I guess not. And then he was like, well, yeah, I think she needs to be a little reasonable. And it's like, no, she doesn't. She doesn't, owe you shit.

And it's not like she's like, instead lighting the house on fire and saying, well, none of us get it. It's like, she's like, she's trying to go about it in a way. that's like fair and, and like being like, no, we're going to sell it and have it go through the proper channels of like that kind of division.

And also like, I don't totally understand why he even wants to stay there. Cause it's filled with such good memes for you. It's, it's filled with the batteries that you bought and all the paper towels, and that's hard to move. Cause. he, he like put a gym in.

None of it's permanent. I don't understand it. I just feel like it's because he, just like, doesn't want to like, be bothered.

Yeah, absolutely.

Like Ariana, wants to be bothered. Like it's, it's not about you. And like, he, just, the, the way he just continues to act, like all of this is so unfair, and it's all things that are like happening to him and not because of him, is like the insane thing to me.

Tom thinks he's a victim. Are you, are you, he thinks things are about him. Yeah. That doesn't sound like him. That's stupid.

And then he wants to go on and say that Ariana should just like, she should just like. move on with life. Like just like, don't worry about me. It's like not a good look. I'm like, sir, she is so unconcerned about you.

She's not worried about you. What are you talking about? She's literally starring on a Broadway show.

She does not talk about you. She doesn't talk about what happened. Like she's the last person to bring up any of this. She tries to avoid it at any cost. Like she has moved on, is moving on.

People were kind of like butthurt. I've seen that even when we talked about Rachel's podcast and it's like, yeah, but they're keeping it relevant. You guys are making that your whole personality. That's your entire podcast. At least what I've seen on Tik Tok.

We talked about it before it even came out. We just heard that she was doing one, and that was it. It came out, I think, right before that our podcast came out. But that day that we were talking about it hadn't even come out yet.

All we were discussing is that it was a pretty kooky idea. So I don't know. I just think, yeah, if you don't want something continually discussed and you feel like you're beating a dead horse, then perhaps shut the fuck up. You got options. Maybe set an alarm next time so you can wake up before 2 p.m.

Oh, when he called me a hater.

Okay. For most, most part, he talks about you. And even that, I feel like he was trying to say it in a positive way, but he does, he was like, you can just tell he holds you in very high regard. And that he loves you. And I think that's lovely.

Well, as he should.

As he, I mean, what's not to love?

I think his choice of words were bad. And that was corrected. in a way. It's like, yeah, no, I have opinions. I'm not a hater.

Being judgmental is the human condition. We're all a little judgmental. And if you say you're not, you're full of shit.

It's the human condition, because that was something as being, if we, if we looked at as, as animals, that is our defense. It is, is how we protect ourselves by judging and sizing up people. So like, that is just, it is kind of natural to just be judgmental.

Yeah. The caveman didn't walk out of their little crib and go up to a lion and be like, you, seem like you need a hug. Like there's, there's a, there's a judgment call there.

But Tom Schwartz would. Oh,

he would. He would.

So I'm just thinking that he, just, because he, he doesn't operate in that way ever in his life. He just cannot understand that it's practically normal. And look,

I do think obviously there's an unhealthy amount of gossip or if that's really someone's whole personality and all they ever have to contribute, bad. But gossiping is sometimes delightful. I'm sorry. You want to have some wine with your friends and you're having a little gossip session. We all do it.

We hate men. Um, no, I don't hate men. I hate the way certain individuals have treated myself or you. It's not an blanket statement about all men. It's just, I'm sorry, but like categorically, men are terrible.

What does your shirt say right now?

It says boys lie. There's an entire brand created about the fact that, like dudes can suck. I wish, I wish men would get their shit together. I don't hate, I don't hate men, but like, I don't know why it's, it's been a pattern of bad behavior. that's predictable at times, because y'all just keep doing the same shit over and over again.

Also, I would say, if you are a man that is triggered by the things that we say about men who are continually having bad behavior, you're probably someone that falls in that category. I do not hate men at all. It's like what Cher said. She's like, I don't hate men. I think men are the coolest.

Oh, God. See this, but that's what I mean is, and I'm not saying that like there's not all, on the other hand, terrible women, because yeah, there are, but if we're ever coming down on dudes and speaking poorly, it's because of those very things. But no, I've met, I love men and I know some wonderful guys out there like that, have been great and treated me great and have great behavior and have been raised right and continue to do so.

Another thing I would say, if, if you're not someone that gets triggered, but you're a man who cosigns on your friends, the people in your life, males that have bad behavior or do bad things, you're also part of the problem. It's like always a see something, say something. There's nothing. again, back to that thing at the bar, when the guy's friends aren't the one saying like, Hey, she just said no five times. Please stop.

Yeah.

Why aren't you the one saying that?

Oh yeah. You're probably just not, not listening to what we're saying, and you're just hearing like you're being like, Oh, this just sounds like you hate men. No. Why don't you actually listen to what we're saying?

Men don't listen. There's men that don't listen.

I know. Well, that's another issue. If you would actually just take a moment, remove the ego and just like, listen to exactly what we're saying. It's not about like, Oh, you hate men. It's like, Oh, these patterns of behavior are the problem and they continue.

Point blank period. We don't hate men. So stop.

All of that to say, we don't hate men.

We don't hate men.

So if you were not listening, cause you probably weren't, just listen to this. We don't hate men.

Let's talk about one of our favorite topics. Let's talk about skincare. Is there anything worse than when you're not feeling good about your skin? That's so hard. No,

I hate it.

A lot of women experience this. I was on birth control for a long time and I went off it and I broke out so crazy for almost a year and it was so, it's like, really affects your confidence.

But also, just like right now, with just like my skin texture and like fine lines coming, I'm just like, what is happening? Just like skin in general. I just want to have that, like baby porcelain, baby skin. And that's where apostrophe comes into the picture. Well, we talk a lot about self love on the show, and one of the best forms of self love is taking care of your skin so you can feel good on the inside and out.

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Same. And just like texture of skin. I think those go hand in hand, but like I want that smooth.

I just want my skin to be as hot as possible. Very important to me.

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I think also men can be triggered by independent women and the fact that they can stand up for themselves, have opinions, take care of themselves. So, I don't think as a result or as a response to that, a lot of women are kind of moving into their soft girl era. I think a lot of women move into that era because they just want to make life easier for themselves. I know I would love to be more in my soft girl era, just to take the stress of everyday life off myself. But it's not easy out in these streets to be a soft girl.

No, it's not. And something actually really frustrates me about that, because in my life personally, I haven't had that option. I have not had that luxury. I've been on my own since my early adult life. I've had no one to fall back on.

Someone said, moving into your soft girl era doesn't feel soft. At first. It feels,

I don't know. It's uncomfortable because you're used to having to have your guard up at all times. When you feel like you have to watch your back and you can't relax, which, I'm pretty sure, is a lyric from Complicated. Did I just quote Avril Lavigne? That was an accident.

100%. But for men that don't understand it, it's like, well, I don't mean this as an attack, but if you were more in your masculine,

She said the quiet part out loud.

I said the quiet part out loud, but if you were more in your masculine, imagine how much easier it'd be for us to be in our feminine. There can't be two princesses in this party.

What a concept. What a concept. And even for women, though, it's funny, because I really crave that masculine energy. I want to be able to relax. I want, it doesn't mean I'm going to mooch off someone or anything.

It's. no, it's about emotional safety. It's about feeling that you can just be safe in this space, not taking care of, taking care of in different ways, but not, we're not talking financially. We're not talking about that. We're talking about just feeling, that kind of release where you're just like, I don't need to be on guard.

Well, it requires a little EQ on the other person's part. And sometimes that's a challenge. Sometimes. You got to be emotionally intelligent to understand that. And also it's like with attachment styles, I am an anxious avoidant.

Right. You don't need to trick somebody into something just so you can get what you want.

Regular chemistry isn't like high school chemistry. Okay. There's. no, there's no periodic table needed. It's really not that hard.

Yeah. What a concept.

What a concept.

Tell me about this, 20 year old. Are you in your Puma era?

Oh God, we have to discuss. Someone called me a Puma the other day and I was like, is that what it is?

It is because it's, you're not quite old enough to be a cougar. I found that out.

It's like not yet a girl, not yet a woman,

but it's not yet a cougar.

You're a Puma bitch.

You're a Puma.

Um, okay. So go out on Saturday night, should have stayed home based on the horrific hangover I had all day on Sunday. However, I did watch eight hours of sex in the city. So it was like, you know, fine, we're healing. And I see this guy, and he's so handsome.

Yeah.

So I was like, I'm just going to go out. So I looked not great. And so this guy starts chatting with me. And then, as we were going into this dive bar for it closed down and we went to the afters, I saw his license and his birthday. And I was like,

so 2000,.

no, thank God. No, he was 26..

Okay.

I know. We feel differently about this, though. And I was like, does that say 1998?? And I was like, first of all, is this real? I need to make sure, like, let me hold that light up with the bouncer.

And it's a great place to be.

He seems lovely enough, but you've been on your 20 something journey.

Yeah. And I'm kind of out of it now.

Are you just like rubbing off of me and then like transferring the torch? Like, why are you, why are you out of it now?

I don't know. I don't know. Maybe I'll go back to it, but I don't know. I mean, I'm not really dating any, I'm not even like, I'm very just doing my thing right now. Not for like, not on purpose.

Oh, you were outside, like you were on patrol.

Yeah. I think I'm just like, want to be like a little more protective of my peace and energy and time. Who knows? Maybe it's just, maybe it's just like I'm going through, like a thing right now,

which is fine. You just have to hold space for where you are. I have seen you at a bar, meet a 25 year old and I looked at you and you're having a conversation and I ordered a drink, and by the time I look back, you guys were making out. So like, I do think there's also something very fun about a drunk makeout. That's just like a delight.

I'm here for you in this, like Puma era.

And also my roster is clear. I quit the dating apps and I just am in a really don't care. There's so many other things in my life that I am focusing on that. it's just like, I really don't care. Whatever happens, happens and we'll see what happens on this day.

You never know. Allow yourself to be surprised. Yeah. I think that's the fun of it all. Not like dating for like sport and being on the apps and like, really like making that kind of concentrate effort, because just that can be so, I feel like daunting and disappointing.

Draining. and also I think that a lot of people are on the apps when they shouldn't be. At times when it's not coming from a good place, from a healed place, it's coming from, it's a tense place, filled with fear of like being alone, and you have to, sometimes you have to sit with fear. So if your worst fear is that you die alone, yeah, not pleasant, not a great thought, but sit with that. So like, yeah,

what if that happens when you're on a dating app, that you're presented with all these options, you know, you just have like options. when you go out in the world, you have to make choices and decisions to like, connect with a person. And I feel like that's way more intentional than just like going like this, swiping, swiping, swiping, sending messages. It just feels, it's so lazy. And again, with no intention behind it, I'm not saying like out in the world, like people can't be lazy and lacking in the intention, but I feel like on an app, it's just, it's, it's so blatant that I'm like, I don't want to participate in that.

Actually, I've had a couple of experiences lately where I've met people in the world and I always like, oh, that's not going to happen. That's why you have to do the apps, whatever. And it's been happening, but they're all so young. And I'm like, perhaps I'm just hanging out in young spaces and I need to be more of a grownup, but I don't care. Perhaps I need to stick a post-it on my forehead and say, were you born after the year of 1993??

Disclaimers.

Disclaimer.

Out there.

Don't talk to me, because I will make out with you.

Oh, kiss me on the mouth.

God,

were you born after 95?

Open for business, open for makeout session. Don't ask me out afterwards. Goodbye.

Or you never know.

I know. I'm not. I'm being fair. And oh my God,

listen, they can be just as the ones that are your age, older, whatever, better on paper can be lacking in maturity in so many other ways.

I've dated men that were 15 years older than me, that emotionally hadn't even been born.

Not looking for anything serious. Sir, you have a full head of gray hair. What are you talking about? You're out here doing it for the plot, if anything, spicing up your life. Have you ever done?

This Sunday, when I was getting home at 7am, what was I doing there? Go home. The sun is coming up.

But you were like, I'm going to go like you. You didn't think you were going to go out, but you just did it for the plot. And now you've got stories to tell.

I got stories, but yeah, that was definitely a for the plot moment. I was like, fuck it. I'm literally was about to go to bed and then I was just like, just go out and see where the night takes me. And it took me all kinds of good places that made me feel bad the next day because I drank too much. But yeah, I'm always doing shit for the plot.

Yeah. Well, I, whenever I find myself, I'm like, okay, well, this is surprising, but like, let's see where this goes. I want to know how the story ends. Um, I have a story from the past. Well, after we, well, after we talked about, like the, you know, the Bill Nyes, Larry Davis and all that, I have a one and I have a story about it.

Hmm.

Okay. But my, for the plot thing is how I accidentally ended up on a date with him once. This is like back in, I don't know, like 2006,.

How does one accidentally end up?

Exactly. So, uh, where I'm from, in Park City, the Sundance Film Festival. that happens there. for like several years in a row, I worked at gifting lounge,

snails.

It was so strange. Dana, it's at a theater that my brother, like, used to manage, this movie theater. Like. it was a theater that I went to like my whole life. So I was like, okay, great.

He invited me to be his plus one, basically,

basically. So we go sit and I'm sitting, I'm like, watching this movie, that I am like, what the fuck is happening in front of me? But I can't like react like that way. I have to like, try to follow along, try and understand what this movie is about. No clue.

I love snails. Snails are my favorite.

It's dark. It's twisted. It's strange. I mean, it's Crispin Glover. What are we expecting?

Did you get your digits? I can't remember.

I think I had given my number to him, like earlier that day. So like, I think there was some, like correspondence, maybe, but, and I wouldn't, I don't think we talked again after that.

Do you guys hook up?

No, no, that's, I mean like, I think, people, there's a lot of, um, people talk about him like him being this strange dude, because he definitely does. I mean, he's, he's done some like weird stuff on, like talk shows in the past and like just, you know, people was like very curious about him because he's just interesting. But like, my experience with him was just kind of like him being.

Me and my friend used to call it doing before it was called the plot, because we were just, we just get a wild hair and be frisky. And this is from a long time ago, but I mean, I, I have so many of these stories. I have lived, this was my first time in Vegas, but I mean, to be fair, I think I was 21 or 22.. And he went out. and I mean, who hasn't hooked up with a promoter?

Oh yeah.

But I met this very handsome, and he was fine, like 10 out of 10.

I think everyone, you gotta like, you gotta get some one night stands in, in your life, but like proper, not just like I slept with someone on the first night. No, like where. like you, basically, you meet someone, you have sex with them and then you never see them again.

Oh, and then, I guess, another Vegas, one of the times I have, not to name drop, but briefly, met Justin Bieber. My next Vegas trip.

Did you have a one night stand with Justin Bieber?

I didn't. I did not.

It'd be a lot cooler if you did. God,

I know. He, um, this guy came up to one of my friends. He's like, she's so beautiful. Like again, 10 out of 10.. So he was like, do you guys want to go to a after party at Justin Bieber's?

That's what they do, though.

Then we got to a suite. They checked our IDs. They took our phones. They took everything. And I was like, this is where the kidnapping happens.

good enough for me.

Ran up. And then all of a sudden I see him like scurry, like a mouse, like kind of across the room a couple of times. And he was wearing shades and a fedora and like a ladies see-through mesh, caftan or something. Like. it was a strange outfit.

No, never. We should go to Vegas immediately. This is making me want to go.

I mean, we're going on a trip soon. We just booked our first trip of the year.

I know. I don't want to tell them.

I don't want to tell them either. Let's tell them after. Okay. Cause I'm pretty excited about it. That's for the plot.

Yeah. I don't, I don't like to reveal that right now.

Okay. That's a secret trip. TBD. It is very funny, and how it came up as funny. So, well, this is a quick anecdote, or we can pick another one.

you just said it was the villain. And now,

it is the villain, but I'm attracted to toxic men. So, obviously I'm attracted to toxic food. So,

you eat the McRib?

Absolutely. I did. Was vegetarian for a few years. I have started eating a little bit of meat.

You have?

I have been doing that lately. Kind of came up out of necessity. I was going through a breakup and I was, when I'm sad or anything, I literally cannot eat.

I have, you, when?

That was the end of the summer.

Is the McRib meat?

No. But, I mean, What is it? I don't know. No one knows. And I don't want to know.

I feel like the McRib is one of those things. Okay, I remember, I remember when it came out, like, back in, like the 90s. Especially around like, remember when the Flintstones movie came out? I remember, I remember, I was, I was associated with that time. I don't know why.

glass.

Anyways, but the McRib back then, I remember in the last couple of years, sometimes when they did another release of the McRib, I tried it again and it was one of those things that I was like, I remember this being way better.

To be fair, I haven't had one in years, but it's a hockey puck. I, when it's, all I'm saying is, when McRib season comes around, I'm going to try it and circle back. If you take down to the Dome a Costco hot dog and you think you're better than a McRib, that's crazy.

Um, if the McRib actually tasted good, I would have no problem with it. That thing was not, it was inedible.

My friends were pretty horrified of me when I used to be like, McRib is bad.

Do you have fish fillets? Yeah. I don't like those either.

Okay, I always turn my nose up at fish fillets, but then when I, so I was vegetarian and then pescatarian, so I ate fish. And so, also out of necessity, there wasn't really anything else on the menu. And I had my first fish fillet in Rome, and it was one of the best things I have ever experienced. So, yeah, I absolutely, I'm not better than a fish fillet. And that here, I will say, they're grosser than they were in Rome.

I'm not trying to be snotty. I'm just saying, if it's good, I'm not going to hate on it. Like, Big Macs are delicious.

I might go back to not eating meat and I need to get a Costco hot dog in before that happens. because, my God, do you put onions on it? You know, those little minced onions? You know, sometimes.

Depends on my mood. I'm not a relish snob, but sometimes all relishes are not equal. So, it just depends. I gotta know if I can trust it or not. Otherwise, I'm just going to stick to, like ketchup and mustard.

I think it's Heinz relish at Costco. Do you like that?

Yeah. Heinz is good. Yeah. But sometimes they have this off brand or random brand of relish and I'm like, it's shocking. Have you ever put barbecue sauce on a hot dog?

No, but I've put creamer.

Under, you put what? Cream?

Cream cheese? In college, there was this like late night stand that they did grilled onions and then cream cheese. I'm sorry, it was one of the best things I've ever eaten.

I'm not against it. I'm just trying to picture.

Taste. I'm fine in it.

I'm trying to like. imagine what that's going to taste like.

I saw something on TikTok recently, obviously, because it's all I do. Someone was talking about. they can't picture things in their mind. when they try to imagine something. They don't see it in pictures.

They don't see things in pictures?

Yeah, like, can you right now imagine a completely realistic apple? Yes. Maybe they were lying to me. No,

I think that's a real, actual thing.

I'd be interested to know if people at home can know if that blows their mind, because the girl who had stitched it was like, I cannot imagine things in a realistic way.

That is so terrible.

Terrible.

Well, okay, I want to talk now, because now we're talking about this. We got to bring it up is the synesthesia. Synesthesia is like kind of feeling all the senses, or connecting senses, or something. So like. we're essentially people who will hear a song and think of a color.

Do you do that?

Yeah, do you not?

No. Really? I never thought of that in my entire life.

So if someone says six times seven, is the flavor lemon-lime.

I would say, have you had any kava root drink today?

Okay, so that's like a real thing, or people will say like Thursday is November.

There's Thursdays in November.

No, Thursday is November. No. Purple is octopus and October.

Octopus, October, purple? No. Absolutely not. I would think black, if anything, because they ink. They're so cute.

Z is electricity.

Okay, that makes sense, Right.

Triangle is 12.

No. Yes.

No. I think so.

Why would triangle be 12?

It just makes sense.

I guess the girls who get it get it and those who don't don't, because that sounds November,

Thursday and seven are all the same.

No.

Yeah. Someone says seven times. seven is so Thursday. It is.

I think that's 49, but I don't think that's Thursday. Also, I did really poorly in math my entire high school, collegiate, elementary school.

But it has nothing to do with math. It's just associating certain, like numbers or colors. or you know, I don't know. It's just. I think it's just really to me, it's interesting and it always makes sense.

Did you know what this was before you knew the word for it? Like, did you, have you done this forever?

I didn't know that this was like the name for it, but it's the same thing when we used to like assign our like colored notebooks to subjects, right? Like, what color did you use for like math?

Well, I told you I didn't do well in math, so I probably never looked in my notebook, but if I did, I don't know. I feel like I see like an aquamarine, like a tealish green one.

there was blue, red, green, yellow.

We're going to put it in blue.

Math in blue. Interesting.

What is math to you?

I don't know. I'm just asking. Okay. Okay. Science.

Green. Okay. It's chemical.

Great. That's good. English was always like a blue or like a, you know, like an English or language. class was always like a blue. Math was always red.

Did you use to pimp out your textbooks with those like covers? Do you remember that?

We used to just turn a paper grocery bag into a.

Oh, a paper bag. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

And then we would add color on them or something.

We think we just stunt on everyone so hard with your new textbook cover unhinged behavior.

No, I was like when we had like the binders and they had the clear plastic, and so you'd make a whole collage from like clippings, from like the magazines and pictures of your friends, and then, like you do, like a new one every, you know, month or something like that, and you show up and you'd be like you made my binder. I mean,

that was like early manifesting. I would, I remember cutting out like from 17 magazine, like specific words that were in it that I liked.

We didn't even know we were mood boarding back then. Vision board, what? Interest? Who is she?

Maybe it's why I was so dysfunctional in my 20s, like as far as just predicting the future, but who knows?

Yeah, mine was like all the nail polishes and boy band. What was I? manifesting? Delusion.

A mess. Delulu. Delulu Island. I love Delulu Island.

Anyways, we have, um, what's called? WW, WWDD. DD. Why is it so hard? WWDD.

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Deeply obsessed. Okay. How do you like to be hit on?

It kind of goes back to what we were saying earlier. just because I like masculine energy and I'm so in charge of my own life. I like someone who will be bold. I like someone who will come up to me and say hi. I like someone who will ask me out.

I'm pretty much the same. I like when people are just like very direct.

I wish I had more context for how she likes to be hit on, because if she's saying that she has discomfort with women, perhaps she hasn't dated women as much. so I totally understand that when you and sometimes it can be different than women. So for me it's like obviously there's signals or friction or whatever, when you can tell you like someone. So it might be something that you need to ease into and if you are typically more comfortable with men, perhaps spend more time in queer spaces or, you know, expanding your network to see if you find that same thing in a woman hitting on you.

Yeah, because you might not know their preference if you're just in like a bar where, like, you're not going to know if someone is going to be like open to that.

It's hard when you're, yeah, when you're at a straight bar. I mean I have definitely ended up by the end of the night making out with some lovely ladies and I've gone on dates with them and seen them after. but it's like there's like this build up to it, which is also sometimes kind of fun, because I'm like are you hitting on me right now? Am I? And then I have red lipsticks smeared all over my face.

just like in an approach too, is like. I mean everyone likes a compliment, but make it like very specific. Don't just be like hey, I think you're like really cute, or I think you're like find something like what they're wearing or.

Originality.

Yeah, try to be original that you've like actually noticed or picked out something about them. A conversation starter, even if you will. I really like your jacket. Where's it from?

Well, this is Levi's, but you know you weren't specifically.

asking that. But like, I think, like that always helped. Yeah, and I think.

the more you get to know yourself whether it is a man or a woman, you'll know what you like. So it's just like you know everyone. you're asking how do you like being hit on? but it's really different for everyone. So figure what you like, spend time maybe in new places and allow that to happen.

Eye contact.

Okay, and eye contact. Sometimes I'm not even good at that. You have to hold like a three minute eye contact. Three minutes. Or three not.