Hope Is the Key to Winning With Your Money

I'm George Campbell, joined by best-selling author and host of The Rachel Cruze Show, Rachel Cruze.

And this is your show, America, so give us a call at 888-825-5225.

You jump in, we'll talk about your life and your money, and we will tell you the truth, even if it hurts your feelings, because we love you that much.

And we appreciate all of you tuning in today.

Becky is in Bristol, Virginia, to kick us off. Becky, welcome to The Ramsey Show.

And I have just had my, oh, crap moment when I overdrew my checking account, because 20 years ago, we had to file bankruptcy.

And at that point, my husband and I separated our checking accounts, because he is a saver and I am a spender, and I got us into that mess.

So now, I am door-dashing, I'm working my full-time job, I'm selling everything that I have purchased, trying to get out of this debt, because I do not want to tell him, and I don't want to ask him to help me.

And I can't find, and DoorDash, where I live, is not that popular, because it's just a rural area.

If my mom needed help, I'd just give her a credit card.

Yeah.

Anything else?

He's not a spender. He's a saver. He paid our house off early.

And that's financial or otherwise, because there's a part of you, Becky, when you hold those kind of secrets and you're trying to be the one to fix it all on your own, which I'm not saying you shouldn't.

I mean, we can get to that discussion in a little bit, but that's going to come out other ways, like within your body.

I'm like, you can't. People, humans, our souls, we can't carry that around. It will come out sideways one way or the other.

And so coming clean for you, Becky, and not even just for him to have the knowledge, for you...

And it's going to be an excruciating conversation.

But I think for any way for you to move forward, not just financially, but in other areas of your life, Becky, you have to bring him into this and or someone else.

If you have a good friend who knows you both well, maybe even going to a third party first and having them sit in with you if it's too difficult because of your history.

But whatever that looks like, I mean, I really would encourage you. You have to tell somebody and then eventually you have to tell him and have this conversation.

And Becky, and I want you to do some good work, too. I'm like, you know, we'll get you some John Deloney, Dr. John Deloney material, too, because there's some real stuff going on, Becky.

Like I know like when you look at those numbers on your screen and you realize, holy crap, I can't even keep up the minimum payments with what I'm doing.

That's your old crap moment. But there's a lot of other stuff, Becky, going on that caused this. Right.

And it's and I mean, I don't know if there's a level of a shopping addiction. I don't know if it's really poor boundaries that you've set with people, a sense of not living in reality.

Right. Like there's all these elements that I want you as a person to overcome because money's just the symptom.

This $85,000 in credit card debt is a symptom of other things going on within you. And until that's fixed and until that's addressed, I really with a good counselor and a therapist, are you going to heal from that, be aware of that and be able to make different decisions day in and day out?

And and I wish there was an easy button. I wish there was an easy button, but it's going to be a season for you guys, a season of financially paying this back, whatever that looks like.

And however you guys decide within your marriage. But it's also going to be a season of rebuilding trust because trust will be broken. It's been broken and hard conversations there.

I mean, it's going to be it's going to be painful, but it is the way to healing. Becky, that is the way to heal. It is not to hold this and try to fix it yourself.

I'm so I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry you're you're in this and I know there's probably so much shame and guilt and regret that you have. But moving forward for you to to be able to take that weight off. Healing has to happen and it can't happen on your own. It really can't. We have to have other people around us and I think good professionals as well.

We got burnt. We went through bankruptcy 20 years ago. We don't want that to happen again. And so I think you need accountability right now. It may not be your husband because there's already a lack of trust there, but we need accountability from other people. You've been doing this alone and keeping the secret. And how old are you?

If you hold on the line, Christian's going to pick up and we'll give you a bunch of Dr. John Delaney's books and different materials, because I think walking through that and kind of opening the door to that part of the world and understanding yourself, I think is big. And Christian, put my book, Know Yourself, Know Your Money in there as well. But we just want to get you some good resources, Becky, and push into this. Don't sweep it under the rug. Don't try to fix it yourself. Do the hard work. It's hard, but that's where the healing is.

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Welcome back to The Ramsey Show. I'm George Campbell, joined by Rachel Cruz this hour. Open phones at 888-825-5225. Ben is up next in South Carolina. Ben, welcome to the show.

So we've been back and forth on just like, I think bankruptcy is the only way for her to get out of that because no income and on disability, I don't see a way of her getting rid of $100K. It's just, is there any other solution?

So she had a car and that was the only thing of value that she had. And my wife had that put into my wife's name so that that way we could cancel the bills for insurance and everything. It was paid off, but we had to cancel insurance and taxes and everything so that a car that's not being driven isn't being paid.

She had heart problems. She went to the hospital because she had an infection in her heart and had to have an aortic valve replacement.

And the surgeon said that she'd never seen that much infection in her heart. And so her blood sugar at the time, her regular blood sugar was like 400.

All the stuff's under control in the facility. She's as healthy as she's ever been, but she's not able to walk is the issue.

It's just a matter of she needs to get physical therapy and they canceled that because they weren't seeing they saw her plateau on her progress.

So they canceled it. It's just a very not very good situation. So motivation's lacking. We've gotten her to therapy on a tele thing.

And so we think that solutions like she's we've had to when we discovered how bad she was in debt.

My wife's grandparents cut her out of the will because, I mean, you're not going to leave the house.

I'm sorry you guys are going through this. Has your wife had a hard conversation with mom to give her the reality of where things are at?

But we don't we aren't financially tied to her, which is what we've been avoiding because we were big fans of the Ramsey stuff.

So we are doing very well in our lifestyles better than I've watched your videos, George, on like where you should be in life at certain ages.

We're 27. We're about double of what your goals should be. Awesome.

So we're doing well, but I'm not going to my wife and I agree. We're not going to financially cripple ourselves to pay off.

I would never suggest that 20 years of bad choices. No, no.

And if she's unable, I can see her just at home if she only has access to a phone and laptop and she's stuck there just continuing this spending out of emotion and depression.

So here's what I would do if I was in your shoes, man.

I would pull her credit report to get a full picture of all the debt she owes, who she owes it to, what the amounts are.

Then I would begin the process of contacting all these creditors and explaining her situation very honestly.

This woman is broke. She's on disability. She is lucky to be alive.

She can't pay these debts.

And many of them are going to go to collections.

And that's just the sad truth of it.

There may not be a situation where she just goes and pays off $100,000 in debt at this point of her life and at this age.

And then figure out what is her disability income and how do we manage her future expenses so that this problem doesn't get worse.

So helping her get on that budget.

And that's where I think the control comes in where you guys have to kind of help her manage this.

You're not hitching your wagon to her financially, but I think she obviously needs some help here.

And it may be your wife's doing because of the daughter-mom relationship to have those conversations.

But that's as much as you can do.

As much as you want to help her and get her out of the debt.

I mean, she may end up going through bankruptcy.

I hope it doesn't happen, but that's a very real possibility at her stage with this amount of debt and her inability to work.

I mean, because she's got no savings, no retirement.

She has nothing.

That's it.

Yeah.

I mean, it screws up your credit.

She's opted out of having options.

Because, Ben, I don't want you guys to feel like you then have to be the parents and control every little aspect of her to save her.

You just can't.

And for her, I mean, there might be a reality where she faces the music, and truly, it's bankruptcy.

But as much as we can avoid that for someone, we try every other possibility than just going down that road.

But it's hard, Ben.

And it is such a delicate balance of family, of saying she's 55.

And I know she's not in great health, so I don't know, obviously, how long she has.

But it could be another three decades.

And you and your wife have to come.

It sounds like you guys are very much on the same page, but figure out what are our boundaries.

Like where's the point that we draw a boundary that we've tried to help as much as we can, but there's only so much that you can do.

As long as none of it's in y'all's name, it's not going to get passed on to you.

It'll go against her estate, which there are no assets.

And so the debt will just get eaten by these creditors.

So that's the sad truth of the matter.

And I'm sorry you guys are going through this, but I'm also proud of you guys.

You've changed your family tree just by going, that's not going to be us.

You guys are doing the right thing, and I'm sorry you had to grow up so fast this way.

But I'm wishing you guys and her the best with her health and financial situation, Ben.

That's a really hard thing to do, but again, we can't change people.

As much as you want to help her, she's got to face the music at some point.

And that's going to have consequences either way.

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Welcome back to The Ramsey Show.

I'm George Campbell joined by Rachel Cruz.

Open phones at 888-825-5225.

Well, Rachel, I don't know what you're doing this weekend, but you know, I'll be on the couch.

Maybe with some buffalo wings watching the big game.

Looking for a Taylor Swift cameo.

I think that is so stupid.

She does not need that.

And the NFL's got to fix themselves.

They got to figure it out.

You pay me $40 million, I might date a football player.

She's fine!

Is this the first conspiracy that you haven't wanted to talk about?

That's true.

Rachel's like, I'm shutting this conspiracy down.

Here's the thing.

That's so, like, that would be crazy.

Like, this whole, like, couples get together.

Like, this happens a lot in Hollywood.

But she doesn't need it.

Anyways, we're getting off topic.

Well, we're here to talk about money, Rachel.

So here's the trivia game we're going to play.

So everyone's like, oh my god, it's like a political thing.

There it is, Rachel.

We all know that.

We all know that already.

And I just, Rachel just went, just unwound.

I'm done.

Go.

So I'm going to name something.

You tell me what you think it costs as it relates to the Super Bowl.

What do you think the flights are costing?

Oh, it's less.

It says $300 to over $1,000 depending on how close and flight availability.

Because I feel like they would have.

Let's move on to hotels.

Now, most of them are sold out.

But Staybridge Suites is one of the only ones that has available rooms.

What do you think it costs for average per night?

Do you have your geographical location?

That's all it says.

I mean, I bet you.

What do you think it costs per night?

You would pay, I mean, $700?

$696.

I'm going to call that a win.

Got it.

All right.

So $1,000 for flights, $700 for the hotel.

And now, what about a resort near the venue?

Oh, man.

You're a little under on that one.

Okay.

Okay.

Now let's get to the tickets.

This is the priciest part.

What do you think the average ticket price is for the Super Bowl?

Average.

Right now.

We're talking secondary markets.

If you just went and you wanted to buy one right now.

What was it?

$10,500 up to $12,000 is the range on the secondary market.

Oh, my gosh.

You guessed the price of Clorox and Rachel gets it right.

Okay.

Obviously.

Look how good I'm doing here.

Yeah.

There you go.

Okay.

Most affordable ticket.

What do you think that is?

So that was average.

What do you think the most affordable ticket is right now?

Give me one more.

$8,000.

$7,500.

$7,500 for the most affordable ticket.

And most of them right now for least expensive are ranging after fees from $7,800 up to $9,300.

Okay.

Okay.

So let's do the math now.

Let's add it all up.

Let's say the flights are $1,000, the hotel is $700.

Let's say you just stayed one night.

Yeah.

You made that happen.

That's $1,700 already.

Now the actual ticket, you're talking, let's say that's $10,300.

This hurts my brain.

I wasn't doing the math.

Sorry.

Were you wanting me to do the math?

Okay.

No food.

Just for somebody that doesn't know this world very well.

Like if you just said, what would a night to stay, that doesn't include food, and go

to the Super Bowl, I kind of thought it would be higher.

Yeah.

Wow.

So I don't know if it's inflation or what.

This is a big game because of some celebrities that might be present.

There was a lot of hype around this one comparatively.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You're like, oh, they've been talking at school apparently about it.

Is this school talk for an eight-year-old?

In third grade, yes.

Now I'm sure the boys actually enjoy the football part of it.

No.

Well, I did an Instagram reel about this.

You can take a trip for two, a seven-night cruise for two in a junior suite with a balcony.

Oh, that's good.

To the Bahamas.

Let's do that all day.

I'm like, I'd rather do that.

Twice.

We compared it to used cars.

You could buy $10,000.

I'm like, would I rather have an upgrade to the car or fully funding a Roth IRA, as

boring as I am.

That's what I would do.

$6,000.

I know.

$7,000.

And again, we're not the most sports-loving hosts-

One of my favorite passes there is.

Come on.

The two-point conversion, I live for that.

The stress is high.

I just think sometimes it's just more fun to be in the comfort of your own home.

Well, can I be honest?

I've been to one NFL game, and the whole time I was just looking at the giant screen because

I could not see what was happening on the field.

And I went, I could just be doing this at home-

No good.

It was not fun for me.

Well, man.

If you're going to the game, good luck.

Budget for it.

I prefer- I'm fine with FOMO on this one.

No, I'm good.

Watching Usher from my living room.

There we go.

That's why I do it at halftime.

That's what she's there for.

And the commercials have been mediocre, I feel like, in the past few years.

I will say.

I'm really hoping for a-

I thought that was going to be part of this segment.

Yes.

Dang.

Next year.

Hoping every dollar will have a commercial next year's Super Bowl.

Maybe we can crowdfund it.

Because Dave's not going to pay a bajillion dollars for 30 Second Spot.

But if everyone pitches in, we can get every dollar in front of America.

Get America budgeting.

Let's do it.

It's what we need.

Because I do wonder how much debt people will be in due to the Super Bowl.

Due to all the costs involved.

I don't know why.

It's like that one-day event type thing.

Your wedding is very different than a Super Bowl.

Don't get mad at me in the comments.

It makes weddings look cheap.

So, I'm like, it's such a-

I don't know.

We're such a culture of experience that it's almost like you lose this gauge of reality sometimes.

And you're just all in.

You're just solely focused on, yeah, that's what we're going to do.

We're going to go to the Super Bowl.

That's what we're going to do.

If you can afford it, and it's on the bucket list, or your team's playing, and you want to go, it's great.

We're not mad at that.

Yeah.

I'm not mad at you.

True.

And truthfully-

Two cruises.

I didn't realize how much I needed that to explain what's happening.

Get it right.

Don't offend any footballers out there.

So I prefer the commentary.

I want to be able to get up and go to the bathroom when I want, you know, and not-

Rachel, have you been to one of these?

No, I have not, actually.

They give them like a trough, and it's just a free-for-all.

It's disgusting in there.

I think it's gross.

That's gross.

But hey, enjoy the game.

Hopefully you're watching from home.

You did it on a budget.

I'm going Chiefs.

You know why.

Deanna's- oh, San Francisco 49ers.

Warhouse divided.

Winston's going 49ers.

I'm going Chiefs.

Wow.

Caroline's going 49ers.

I'm going Amelia, Kansas City, Charles, Kansas City.

And that's the truth.

Who cares about the scores?

I'm all for it.

I'm here for the queso.

This is the Ramsey Show.