Conan Must Go: Sebastian (Argentina)

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Hi Sebastian, welcome to Conan. O'Brien needs a fan.

Hey hi, nice to meet you man.

How are you, Sebastian?

How are you?

I'm great, how are you?

Fine, fine, very happy to talk to you man.

Well, I'm happy to talk to you, man. I got to tell you right now where are you? You're in Buenos Aires. Is that right?

Buenos Aires, Argentina Yes.

I love the accent. Buenos Aires, Argentina.

Argentina.

Yeah, fantastic. Tell me a little bit about yourself, Sebastian.

Okay, I'm an artist, a painter, illustrator, and well, I live here since I was a little boy. I was born in Los Angeles, California, but my parents and all my family is from Argentina, so I came back to Argentina when I was a little boy.

Oh, wow, okay, and you said you're a painter. Are those your paintings behind you?

Yeah, here I am in my studio, these are some of my paintings.

Oh my God, you're really good. thank you. Those are terrific.

Okay, thanks, thanks.

He also did one of someone else we know here. I'll just put this up to the camera. Oh my God.

Oh my God, did you do that? SeBAstian Oh God.

Well, yes, I was studying some Irish history and it came along, that character.

Oh my God, I have to say you've got the proportions, right? You've got the long legs. And you were. Thank you, you were a little generous with the torso, with the chest, and everything looks pretty much spot on.

Okay, thank you, thank you, thank you very much.

Have you done artwork that's been used internationally?

Yeah, yeah. I work internationally since like 20 years, I work with so many medias and I do paintings for famous celebrities and rock stars.

Can you tell us which rock stars you've done paintings for?

Well, I've done for the Red Hot Chili Peppers Foo Fighters last week, I've done one for the Black Crows.

Oh my God, I love all those groups, I really love the Black Crows, I love those guys.

Yeah, they're amazing.

Yeah, wow, that's very impressive. Tell me, Sebastian, I'm curious because if I were to ask you to paint me, what would your approach be?

I've already did no, I know.

Yeah, no, I know you did, I know you did, and it's very good. But I guess what I'm asking you is, what have you noticed about me that stands out in a portrait?

Well, your hair, it's notorious.

No, it hasn't committed any crimes. It's not that you know of. Yeah, I love that my hair is notorious.

Yeah, I think that that's one. But if you do a hair and the face is not, when you do a portrait, the face is not looking like the character.

Wait, wait a minute, wait, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute.

You say that like, we should know what you mean.

What do you mean? I have a tomato soup can chin, and I'm not saying you're wrong, go ahead, I just want to know what you mean.

The campbell The campbell soup.

I don't care what type of soup it is, I want to know why my chin is like a can of tomato soup.

Because you're like, I don't know the name in English, but you have the like. Your face is like, very proportional, like like it's done with metal, you know?

Like, I look like my face was bashed out of metal. I look like someone just took a hubcap from a car and just bashed it with a hammer like that, yeah.

Yes, yes, it is.

Have you noticed that I have sharp cheekbones?

Yes.

Thank you, there you go. And Sebastian, I thank you for that because I'm looking at you and I'm thinking, you look like, you know what? Is his name? Krista Waldau from? Who's that? Oh, Niccolo Coster-Waldau?

Yeah, but if he were a bottle of ketchup, the little guy?

The little guy No.

No, no, no. Jamie Lannister, the Kingslayer, the one that gets his hand chopped off. Sorry, spoiler alert.

No, no, I know that guy and I hope I don't have the same luck because he lost the hand.

Yeah, no, no, no, I didn't mean you're so good looking, you're going to get your hand chopped off. I just said, you look like Nicolai Coster-Waldau and you should be very happy. You're a very good looking fellow.

Yes, you are, you are, man.

Yeah.

Let's talk more about that. I was going to go ahead to imitate your hair, but I cannot do it. It's not for everyone.

For anyone.

To have that hair.

So you meant to say my hair is not for everyone, but you said it's not for anyone, yeah.

It's notorious, it's a war criminal.

So do you think maybe I should change my hair now, or is it too late?

No, never.

Okay, I'm not going to change my hair. what would you change it to? You'd just like, flick it back. No, I can do whatever I want.

Yes, you can, Yes, you can, you have all the skills.

How do you know?

You should look like a German painter, you know, something like that from the Renaissance.

Okay, so you're saying that I have all the skills? And then I asked you, What do I have? And you say, Well, you sort of look like a German painter, yeah, but you don't know that I have any painting skill.

No, you don't, I don't know.

I don't, I don't.

The look is 100%.

You have to look like a painting to be a painter.

SEBASTIan Is this how you pick a surgeon when you need surgery? I want that guy, he just looks like a surgeon.

Yeah, I look the guy that comforts me, I don't know if he's a cleaner or a computer technician. Just do me an operation of my heart. You look good, man.

I love that, I love your attitude, Sebastian, and I'm really sorry about your upcoming heart surgery. I don't think it's going to go well when you're plumbing.

Well, I pick a monkey, you know?

So Sebastian, I don't want to get too personal, but you're a very good looking guy and you're a very talented painter. If you were single, I'd think, man, this guy would be just killing it out there with the ladies, right?

Well, no, I married 20 years ago, I have three teenagers, so kids. So no, it's not happening.

Okay, all right. well, listen, don't say sorry, that's okay, I'm speaking for myself.

I have twins, I have twins like Sona, Oh, really.

Hey, they're teenagers.

Yeah, they are teenagers. Yeah, that's cool. The worst is coming, you know?

No, no, it's good, it's good, it's all going to be good. No, no, no, no. When they're in prison, at least, you know where they are.

And probably they go together.

Yeah, they'll both be in the same cell, so you have one visiting day and you see them both.

Yeah, that's right, that's right. We are like, focused, focused in our work, in our family.

Focused? Yes, we're focused on our families, and we don't even notice that all these women desire us.

No, no, no, you guys are insane, and here in Argentina, you have very nice women.

Really, tell me more about that.

Yeah, yeah, South America is even better than Brazil, what's that? It's even better than Brazil.

Even better than Brazil. Oh wow, the women of Argentina are quite beautiful. You say, maybe I could come by for a visit.

We would love to receive you and I will take you on a tour. But no women, no women, only our wives, you know?

Well, my wife can't make it. I mean, I haven't asked her. Oh, okay, but she won't be available. Okay, so I might be on my own, but you could be my wingman.

Oh god.

I have certain.

You know that I spend hours and hours listening to the podcast while I work.

Oh, that's nice, that's nice to know. So does the podcast help you with your work in any way?

No.

It just kills time, huh?

Yeah, it kills time, it distracts me, you know?

No, no.

Talking serious, you're a very good company and I work a lot here in my studio alone and always listening to the podcast.

You know, Sebastian, I have to say that's kind of mind-blowing. I never get tired of hearing people from different parts of the world saying that we're in their ear being idiots while they're doing their good work. So that's amazing.

And also I have a story of.

Oh, why would you get busted?

Because we were singing the song of the.

You were singing.

All the classroom and we didn't stop, and we earned, I don't know, a bad note because we sang all day the monorail thing.

Into our head. That makes me so happy that a song I wrote back in I don't know, 1991 or 1992 in a little tiny office I was in high school. Yeah, here in Los Angeles.

Okay, well, some of my friends are in jail now because of that.

You know what? No better reason to go to jail, in my opinion.

Hold it.

We're just reviewing one more time. We're both very good-looking, handsome artists, and we both are very loyal to our wives. But who can say anything could happen at any moment? And you think that I should come to Argentina because the women are very beautiful.

I play guitar, I play guitar also.

Oh, cool, of course you do. Oh, we could. Jam. Hey, do I would I stand out in Argentina?

No, but we have a lot of mixes, you know, in Argentina, they come from all over the world because of the World War II, you know?

Oh, we have Italians, we have Germans, so you have a lot of nazis hanging out, yeah.

No, no, no.

SEBASTIAN So what would give me away in Argentina? would it be my hair, or my ridiculous, notorious hair, or my tomato can jaw?

Sorry about that. No, no, you could look like an Argentinian. You just have to chill more, you know, when you walk and be a little more chill and not that tense, you know?

Yeah, you're saying, I'm too herky-jerky, I'm too, you know, and I need to just....

Here in Argentina, we are more lazy, you know?

Yeah, all right, so I'll just do this a lot, I'll kind of walk around.

Well, not that much like a zombie, you know, but we're not zombies.

Wait.

Less nazi, less zombie, more chill.

I think you could help me, Sebastian. We are weird.

We are weird, we are weird people.

No, I don't think so. I think that maybe I would find my true self if I came to Argentina because I would relax, you know? And I think way deep down, there's an inner sensuality that's never been allowed to boil, and I think maybe that could happen in Buenos Aires.

You have to come, guys, you will. It's very funny here. You will have a good time, okay?

Well, and could we?

We are.

No, they have to go.

Not my daughter, not my daughter. No, no.

I want all of them out, they all have to go stay someplace else when I'm there.

You take them to school, you take them to sports.

You have to do things, you have to do things, you have to earn your keep all right. So I got to take your kids to school and kind of look after the place.

They are 12.

Okay, all right, I can handle that.

I have a 15-year-old daughter.

Okay.

The name is Juana.

JUANA Okay, all right. Well, I'm going to think about this, but you're a very impressive guy.

Thanks, man. I was wondering what to do, and I know you like history.

And well, for me, you are better, yeah.

Yeah, we don't have that money for the costume, you know?

Yeah, I understand well. Thank you very much Sebastian. It was an honor to talk to you and I'm glad that you've been listening to us.

Okay, yes, thank you. I'm with you since a lot of years, so you are a great inspiration for me.

Well, thank you very much Sebastian, and you're an inspiration to me. You take care, okay?

Thank you.

Bye-bye, bye bye.

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