2023-04-12 02:25:20
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Hey, Pardon My Take listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime. Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music on today's Pardon My Take N.BA play-in action. We're actually starting the show with a minute left in overtime of the dumbest game possible. The Lakers vs the Timberwolves. We're going to talk about the Heat Hawks, we have Hot Seat, Cool Throne, an awesome interview with Adam Richman Man vs.
Food really, really fun time. He was in-studio, told us some great stories and then we'll wrap it up with guys on Chicks.
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Okay, let's go.
Welcome to part of my take. Today is Wednesday, April 12th, and we've got NBA playoffs, kind of NBA play-in game. We're watching OT right now. There's 35 seconds left. Live it up, PFt.
We have NBA playoffs, play it.
No, so they were very specific about this in the early game. It's not a playoff game, it's technically a non-regular season game, so these stats don't count towards the playoffs, they don't count towards the regular season.
It's its own thing, it's no man's land.
The points with 35 seconds left in overtime, this game sucked. The fourth quarter was so bad. I think everybody out there with a pulse that's ever seen basketball or heard of the state of Minnesota before knew that the Timberwolves were going to give this up.
The Lakers were going to come back, the N.B.A. David Stern was going to figure out a way for LeBron James to advance.
To the playoffs, well, and it's not even the Lakers playing well, the T-Wolves just. They were so hot from three for the first half, they were lights out, they were playing a great game.
Everyone was like, Rudy Gobert, who now we can play five out, we've got all this flexibility. Carl Anthony Towns is playing great. Even though they just kept on giving them fouls. And every time he had to sit, the Lakers would crawl back.
And then we got to the fourth quarter and they scored a combined 31 points. In the fourth quarter. The Timberwolves scored 12 points. The Timberwolves didn't score. They scored their last field goal with six minutes left in the game.
The next time they scored was Anthony Davis. This is how dumb the game was. The Lakers go up by three with a minute or a second and a half left. Memes tweets it from the part of my take account game winner.
Anthony Davis fouls Mike Conley, shooting a three from basically behind the basket. The Timberwolves hadn't scored in fucking six minutes, and he fouls Mike Conley, shooting a three up three.
With one second left, they get, they get three foul shots. The first barely made it, and the second and the third were both extremely shaky from Conley. Even though Conley played awesome tonight, this was a great game for Mike Conley.
That was awesome. A former teammate of Mark Titus, he hasn't, he hasn't mentioned that. Yeah, also, I took a piss next to Ed Sheeran one time, but yeah, Mike Conley played basketball with Mark Titus.
Great game, legacy game under the bright lights of the play in tournament for Mike Conley. And, uh, they scored. The Timberwolves scored with 0.1 seconds left on the clock, and then they didn't score until, uh, overtime with, like, a putback layup.
We almost just got double overtime there for a second.
Oh, you're a little ahead of me, shit. I hope we don't get good double overtime. Don't stream, snipe hank, yeah.
Damn you stream, snipe me hank, Uh. And now it's probably going to happen, we'll get the live reaction. Well, I don't know what's happening, I'm watching on my computer.
Uh, so I'm a cord cutter, like all the new kids. Uh, but yeah, this game, this game. Oh man, oh shit, you're right, we almost did.
They bricked a number, another three. This game was so bad, though this game was revenge for everyone who said, Why would you watch March madness? It's just a bunch of dudes missing shots and throwing the ball out of bounds, cause there was that sequence where the Timberwolves just missed every shot.
And then, like LeBron threw one out of bounds, there was the loose ball foul, like everyone, just sucked. And here's my thing with the play in tournament, I like it in theory, because more basketball, more fun.
These teams suck, these teams aren't going to. Like, I need a play in tournament team to win a title for me to start respecting the play in tournament. Because the N.B.A. playoffs, like historically, are the. You know, the top seeds are usually the teams that you see at the end of the end of the whole thing, you know what I mean? Like, you were just deciding who's going to go get. Maybe the Lakers will, ESPN will tell us tomorrow. The Lakers watch out for them, they're going to take down the Grizzlies.
Maybe the Hawks are going to go after Hank Celtics, I don't think so. Like the heat were so bad tonight, we'll get to them in a second. But like, at the end of the day, these teams are just not, none of these teams are going to win a title.
Well, the eight teams in the play in tournament are not going to win a title.
So people forget the reason the Plan tournament was basically started. Much like Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire got admitted to the Tri-Wizard tournament as a fourth wizard. They wanted to get Zion Williamson into the playoffs his rookie year. So they were like, Okay, tell you what, let's have, let's have the pelicans.
We'll do, we'll do, like a special thing where the Pelicans can technically play some, some playoff games and get ratings on it. Also, the N.B.A. just wants another event to slap a sponsor on, so they're like, Okay, it's the play in tournament presented.
By AT&T, that's another $5 million. Well, it also was built in, as you know, credit the N.B.A. for actually trying to get tanking to stop, which they've made measures to. You know, like flattening the top three picks in the lottery and everything. So the play in is part of that, where you can still be in the playoffs and you're you shouldn't take. If you're one of these bad teams. It's under 500 that could be in the 10th seed.
But the Mavericks pissed all over that this year. So, like the Mavericks, like the after watching this game. The N.B.A. should stop their investigation against the Mavericks. Because the Mavericks were like, Hey, we'd rather a draft pick than play in this.
Play in tournament and I agree with their decision. Yes, a hundred percent. Yeah, absolutely. You think you think the, uh, the Thunder are going to get lucky, win two games and then?
Get to the N.B.A. finals. The Thunder are the only team. You could say, well, they're getting reps, young team, Shea, like, they're getting reps next year, Chet, They're they're getting right.
You can always flip it where it's like, well, that team needs some reps, that's big time playoff, playoff pressure for them. A lot of guys who haven't been there. Well, the, uh, the pelicans.
Are doing the exact same. The Pelicans are just like Zion is not going to play because of reasons.
And just trust us on that one, did you see? He released a statement today. He said He feels good, but he's not going to play until he feels like Zion again. Yeah, so you remember when, when he?
Was coming back from, I don't know. This is like four injuries ago, where they had him practicing on like a special trampoline, like a small floor, a soft floor. Zion's just never going to be healthy. And, uh, he said that he's sick of this shit and he would like to play and he is healthy. But he's not himself right now. So that's just basically Zion being like, yeah, you know, I'd really like to, but they pay me anyways, so why would I exercise if they're going to give me?
Money, right, right? I, Uh. So it looks like this game is over, Hank, do you want to tell us this game's over?
Is it officially over? You're faster than us? No, it's not over yet. Okay, well, let's just say the Lakers, The Lakers have advanced to play against the Grizzlies.
Maybe they can beat the Grizzlies. Oh, they just showed, uh, Rob Lowe slash, Rob Polinka, uh, watching his team playing game for for number one picks in this playing game.
That's how, you know, it was official. I have a fun fact, yeah. So this is now the first time that all four teams from California have made the N.B.A. playoffs. Okay?
So that that's often.
My other fun fact that I was thrown, Did I throw it out to you guys yesterday? I can't remember. It's so late that I've lost my mind. I'm not in. This is football shape.
We're not in football shape. This is also the first time since the Mavericks became a franchise in 1981. I want to say that no teams from Texas made the playoffs. Oh, wow, yeah, wow.
So it's like a reverse of.
All those companies that moved to Texas, like Twitter, all that stuff, we're going back, yeah.
Yeah, exactly all right. So the Lakers in advance, the T Wolves, let's say, let's let's do some positive spin zones for the T Wolves. Okay, one I think they're better without.
RUDY Go Bear, Yeah, like, legitimately, you. You can make the case on defense that they need somebody like that to protect the rim, but on offense they are like, I don't think it's even a debate right now. They work better, with the exception of the last six minutes of the game.
They work better on offense without them two. Uh, you get a home game now. Home Wolves are undefeated in home playing games that will be electric three.
I don't think Anthony will, uh, Anthony, uh. Edwards can play worse than he played tonight. He was so, so bad over nine from three.
Three for 17 shooting. Look lost out there. Respect to him for he kept shooting at least. He's like, one's, one's got to go in at some point, he's the ultimate confidence.
And then it just never went. I tweeted this out. But you remember how when you were in, Uh, like, when you were playing basketball, when you're in elementary, middle school. And the coach showed you a hoop, a basketball hoop, and then put two balls inside of it. It was like, Look how big this rim is like, you get, you should be able to make these shots easily. That's what they needed to do for Anthony Edwards tonight.
Um, cause he was, he was so bad, so bad, and he kept shooting.
So there's your spin zone like, and you have Luca Garza on the bench who's ready to go. He would, he was not dressed tonight, but, uh, Dennis Schroeder did the the three point celebration right in Luke Garza's face. I feel like that was a little too much because, like, what can Luke do? yeah.
He's not out there.
Hopefully we can get some. Some protesters gluing their hands to the floor in Minnesota, that would.
Be nice, run that back. So Friday night we'll find out who the Timberwolves play after tomorrow's games. Um, let's talk about the other game. Uh, the death of heath heat culture. Jake, it's over.
And I'm not trying to just be a prisoner of the moment. But they got absolutely bullied 63 to 39 on the rebounds, absolutely bullied and in a reverse. Like how we just said Anthony Edwards couldn't play worse, I don't think Kyle Lowry could play better. They got the best Kyle Lowry game and they still lost.
Uh, I, I was like, I thought that he were going to win. I still believe in heat culture, I think it might be dead. They got absolutely bullied, yeah.
Uh.
Clint Capella had more offensive rebounds than the Heat did as a click. Awesome tonight.
Clint Capella had an all-time stat line he was two for three from the floor, over four from free.
Throws and 21 rebounds. Yeah, yeah, I bet on him to get a double double tonight. Would have been nice to spread some of those stats around a little bit, but yeah, he was, he was a beast. And it got off to a weird start. Because, uh, the. The article came out quoting people from the, uh, the Hawks front office that they were open to shopping everyone, including Trey Young, before the game started.
And so this was like Trey Young revenge game on his own, his own franchise, essentially being like, Fuck you. I'm going to show you what I can still do. Um, yeah, it was. It was a great game. Quinn Snyder did a great job, Quinn Snyder.
I think we can say, like, if you need, if you need one guy to win you one N.B.A. game with, like, an average roster. Quinn Snyder is probably the.
Best guy out there to do it, he's a very good coach. The Hawks are the play in champions, they are three and all time and play in games, so they deserve that crown.
Um, a couple other things I was thinking about it. So, 63 to 39 on rebounds, I think that's the third largest, uh, 24 point, 24 point margin you can have. So I was thinking, I wrote them all out, this is, this sounds very stupid.
It's one in the morning. I think 43 19 is a bigger margin. Oh yeah, yeah, no.
And I think 94 69 is also a bigger margin, and then 63 39 I've talked about.
This before, with like 14 point games and football, there are some scores that are way more than 14 points. I would say like 10 to 24. Um, pretty big. 14 point margin, but not as big, not as big as nine to 23. Nine to 31 17, 31 17 is another big one. Yeah, anytime you can jump double digits, that's that's more than 14 points.
Yeah, yeah, so uh yeah, so that's my uh, quick.
Quick power rankings of 24 point uh differences, so it's 43 19, 94, 69, 63 39. Again, this is one in the morning. Thought, No, it's literally wrote them all out, yeah.
I wish you could see my computer right now, cause I was writing them all out. And 33 nine was like, Well, that's early in the game, they'll, they'll catch up. You know, it feels large, but you're like, that can't be the end of the game.
Yeah, no, all numbers are not created.
93 69 Whatever, fucking Jake. Oh wow, Jake, Jake's with a fact.
Jake's spicy tonight Cause?
His heat's 93 60.
Yeah, yeah, Jake, what do you want to say, your heat culture? Jimmy Butler had like a tweet that like a f, or a post-game comment that sounded like a fan tweeted it with like three followers.
He said Come Friday, we have to play the legit exact opposite.
Of how we played tonight, yeah, I mean, pretty, pretty good offensive rebounding by Atlanta was.
Insane.
I have a question, Jake, Basketball, if you're let's pretend you're the basketball gym, let's pretend you're you're, you're Pat Riley. Do you think? Having a roster with the only powerful? BAM is a power forward playing center, so when you put him at center, your other two power forwards are Kevin? Love, who we love. Any dominance has. Who's 55 years old, do you think that might be?
A roster construction issue? Um, I've always believed in Pat Riley, he always seems to be making the right moves. So it seems like this is going to be a hardcore reset after this year. Obviously, Mr. 305 is departing.
So I think there's a lot of pressure on him to reshuffle some things over the summer. Yeah, I mean, in in Pat Riley's defense.
Like, you don't, this hasn't got old fast, you know? Like no one's thought you saw that one, you thought you couldn't rely on him. He might come back next year. I, I'm not going to believe that he's retired until he actually retires.
But it was one of those things I was.
Looking at the box score, I was like, huh, like, I love Haslam? Great. Like, who wouldn't want to have his career? Where you can just basically hang out on a team for the twilight of years and just be a guy and like, hang out. Played in like five years.
It's been a long twilight. So did Mack McClung do it as a last game of the year? But but in in reality, you probably want your power forwards to not be. You don't have Haslam and Kevin love, you know, playing game, or have Bambi or power forward and have a center that could also work. It sounds like you're saying, or any game, or any game, or any game, or any game, Uh, I guess. Cody Zeller is also on the roster, which is always fun name to say.
Um, shout out Charlie Barkley for telling people just don't watch the first round of the Eastern playoff games. That was awesome. I'm sure that, I'm sure his bosses were very happy to hear that. Yeah, well, they were happy bosses.
Yeah, in what way? Cause he does the West.
Oh, I thought that TNT was going to be. I thought they always do. The West do they do both?
I'm pretty sure the Western Conference finals, I don't know how, the first round, I think they they kind of switch.
Those are going to be on on TNT. It's going to be Charles Barkley doing the halftime show and he's like, just do yourselves a favor, don't watch the first round.
Of the play, I love it, he's beat, That's why people love Charles Barkley, he's being honest.
They can get away with that type of comment and not get in trouble for it, I feel like.
And but but it was back to what my the playing game talk like, these teams aren't going to go anywhere. I know that people are going to try to tell us the Lakers are going to go somewhere, they're not going to go anywhere. And and you can quote this and tweet it whatever. The Hawks aren't going to go anywhere, the heat, the Bulls, the Raptors aren't going to go anywhere.
It's just.
A fact. I just think there's no chance that the Hawks can do what they did tonight against the Celtics on the glass. It's just not going to happen, no, and they don't play defense.
The good news is if the Heat do make it to the playoffs and the Celtics do.
If the Heat do make it to the playoffs, they're going up against a team that can't rebound at all in the Milwaukee box. Wait, shit, I forgot they have Giannis.
That's going to be, I mean, I don't want to watch that, I don't want to watch that. Uh, hank your scared meter for the Hawks, is it? It can't be zero? Uh, I mean, if it can't be zero, then it's one.
Okay, that's fair. Well, it can't be zero, just.
Because, like, we'll get, we'll give them one game, just because it's the N.BA, you never know what's going to happen. Maybe they went a home game, Celtics in five, if it goes six, something went.
Seriously wrong, it can't be zero, just because I've learned. When A Max's Sixers were the eighth seed and took down the bowls when Derrick Rose got hurt, you could always have an injury, so it can't be zero.
Yeah, that's really the only thing I think we already have.
We already have the hand injury. Oh yeah, thank you, would you say. Like, if you stay fully healthy, it's going to be whopping.
I think even if Jalen or Jason doesn't play, it's going to be a whopping.
I think it's going to be one, it's going to be four one and Trey Young has one in the same game.
Yeah, I was going to talk so much that feels, that feels like, but it could just be it could be four. Oh, like, they could, they could just lock them down. Yeah, this is, I mean.
We'll see what I mean, the heat, maybe the bowls would play the heat shake, that'd be fun. See who can go get massed up by the box. I think we're all in agreement now.
Just give me the Celtics, the bucks and give us all the popcorn.
We're sorry. Oh damn, that was way worse than my 94 93 Celtics in the Sixers and we can watch.
Whatever happens on the show, whatever happens, yeah, how much popcorn are you talking about here?
Jake Kettle corn, I'm going to hold you this a lot, kettle corn.
That's dangerous. A ton of kettle corn, that's also not happy city. you can't, you don't eat kettle corn when you're watching sports.
Uh, I don't remember the last time I watched, I ate any popcorn watching sports, but yes.
It's not like, sold, you eat kettle corn when there's like a little dish of kettle corn, just like in the kitchen, you're like, Oh, I'll just grab a little hand, yeah.
No knockout.
I've done it. Yeah, you can add, like, King, King, Richard's Fair, you're just going to, like, you know, an old, an old, an old Renaissance fair. Just crush some kettle corn.
But that's not a little more salt. That's like, that's like holiday food, you have it around the holiday. What do you mean? Renaissance was the original sport.
You don't eat kettle corn when?
You're watching sports on TV, how about that? I'm going to change that at the Celtics play the.
Sixers The Celtics play the Sixers. You need to eat an entire bag of kettle corn for every day.
Yep, you said, give me all, you said, give me all the popcorn, give me all the cattle.
Fine, one full bag of kettle corn can't be a small bag, has to be like a real bag of kettle.
Corn every single day. Okay, now I'm rooting for Celtics, this Sixers, just watch the game.
It gets sick of kettle corn. Um, and we do get Lakers grizzlies, which will be fun. I'm excited for that and, you know what, I'll listen to Enough people tomorrow on TV.
And I'll probably be like, watch out for the Lakers, cause they just trot everyone out. To be like, the Lakers could do something. And then I'll just be like, fuck it, maybe the Lakers could do something.
They might beat the Grizzlies, I could see them winning that series, the Lakers. I think the Lakers are sneaky good.
The NBA is kind of rigged. I can take this back if the Celtics won the championship, but like that game was, there's some NBA games. When you're like, you just know what's going to happen. It didn't matter what happened the whole game, you just knew the Lakers were going to win the Lakers, the Lakers are good.
They beat a Timberwolves team that some people were saying could win the N.B.A. title this year. No, you never said that, I said, never said that. I said, Could they beat a team? I want to defend you.
Some media members that don't know ball, we're saying that the Minnesota Timberwolves could win potentially two series. Oh, yeah, I.
Well, yeah, cause you never said they could win the title. You said you bet on them to win the title because they could win two series and then you could hedge out. Yeah, no, they, they definitely.
Didn't even bet on a team that you thought, No, no, no, they. They definitely can't win the title, but I did bet on them to win the title and I still think that was a good bet.
Value play Um, yeah, Grizzlies, Lakers. But Hank, you're right, like, put your, put your Tinfoil hat on. What is the NBA want more than anything in the second round?
Sixers, Celtics So Jake can eat all his kettle corn and Lakers Warriors, so we can have Steph versus LeBron.
One last time before LeBron retires. Yeah, I mean, what they really would like would be another Celtics Lakers finals. Oh, talk about race sick.
I mean, if you lost the LeBron.
Hank, you would? you actually would? You would? I would? Yeah, I don't want to say what, but you'd have to, you'd have to kill yourself. Retire. Yeah, no, I retire.
I retire, I retire from life, all right, let's kick it to ourselves. Back in studio, we have an awesome interview with Adam Richmond in studio as well.
Really fun guy, you probably remember from Man versus food. Basically did the job we all wanted to do. And, uh, yeah, and back to us. Hot see Cool Throne, Hot see Cool Throne is brought to you by our friends at Coors Light.
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Hot seat, Cool throne, Henry, My hot seat is love. Oh, no, I don't like that.
Taylor Swift and her boyfriend broke up. Yeah, it's tough, although Swifties all over the world are breaking up with their boyfriends now in solidarity.
Isn't this? Isn't this good thing, though, because it means that we're going to get some bangers out of Taylor Swift. There's, there's nothing like a good Taylor Swift breakup album. I had a little debate with our colleague.
Kelly Keegs who is I think noted Swiftie? noted Swiftie? Very funny, love having loving love working with her.
Taylor's the problem. I mean, didn't she have that as a lyric, too? Yeah, it's me, it's me.
I'm the problem, she is the problem. She is emotionally not vulnerable enough. So every time she breaks up and everyone's like, Oh my god, it's so sad. No, no, no.
Taylor's the problem, of course, of course, she is. Yeah, she did admit it, but this is a good thing.
I'm telling you if you, if you're a fan of music, having a Taylor Swift break, you know what? It's about to be another sad girl autumn. That's fine. It's going to be. It's going to be great. I like Taylor.
The leaves are going to turn. What's that mean for the summer? I mean, single girl, you know? What we should do? What we should do is we should try to get Billy with Taylor Swift and just have Billy break her heart so we can get more bangers. On the drive of the 405, we spent like two hours talking about ways we'd be terrible boyfriends to Taylor Swift to make her have the best album.
Yeah, just like completely emotionally neglect her and just drive her insane.
I think she does that to her boyfriends. No, no, but we'd we'd play it back, you know, you'd fall in love and then she'd break your heart. No, no. Like spin it, leave her at the.
Date and don't pay the bill, start dating her mom. Yeah, you're just being a scumbag, yeah.
Yeah, no, no, somebody should be. yeah, you should be a scumbag.
To Taylor, I might. I'm going to call her right now, she's going to date Pete Davidson. It's going to happen. That's kind of tacky for her.
Nah, I think she went from a British actor. Single girl Summer. He's the perfect rebound.
Maybe hook up, not date, she'll be, she'll be photographed, she's not going to date.
She's.
Going to date, this will be our viral clip for the show. All right, who you got, Taylor Swift or Beyonce?
It's Taylor Swift easy, Nah, it's so easy, so easily, that Coachella performance Taylor can never you can't. No one can name a single Beyonce song, Lemonade.
Single ladies who runs the world? I'm just trying to get people mad at girls. No, you guys, you guys. No one knows a single Beyonce song, right? No idea, no idea.
Isn't she like, old? Yeah, she's super old. Taylor Swift, much better vocalist, Wait, Single Ladies, Rihanna or Beyonce, It's Beyonce.
Yeah, to the left, to the left. oh oh, oh, oh, oh oh, if I was a boy.
All the single ladies No, wait, no, is that it? Yeah, all the single ladies, all the single.
Ladies under my umbrella, Ella, that's Rihanna, that's Rihanna, Rihanna trumps all of them.
I'm aware, Hank, we're trying to go fucking viral here. I will say it's a legacy tour right now.
For Taylor Swift, she's in the middle of her tour right now. She's in Tampa this weekend, New York. I think end of May, maybe the fans this weekend who are going will just get like.
An extra banger? Here's my point. I like Taylor Swift. I don't want the Swifties to come after me. I know they're very passionate.
I just like, she clearly is, you know, breaking up with these guys and then having everyone be like, Oh, poor Taylor. She is not letting herself become emotionally vulnerable and finding love. Love should trump all, and it's fine if she wants her career over love.
That's great, but don't cry me a river when you're, like, you know, 70 years old by yourself. Taylor, Not that she will be. No, I mean, I'm very scared of the swifties, very.
You can tell I'm very, I'm couching all my language, I don't, I don't know who out there.
Would disagree with you about that because she's very clearly. Yeah, it's tough, probably tough to date. Taylor Swift Yeah.
She's just too tall. Lana del Rey is the true goat, though that was unnecessary a lot of their way. I love Lana del Rey.
She's like, she just got engaged. Oh no, yeah, she had a breakup, damn.
She just dropped a new album that was killer after the breakup. There's a tunnel under Oceans Boulevard. Oh, you know what? In in the spirit of solidarity amongst dudes, I'm sick of dudes having their hearts broken by Taylor Swift.
I'm saying, as guys, we should all band together and say we should go on strike from dating. Taylor Swift and the Swifties are so strong. Like, it's, it's kind of a joke, but there's definitely. She's has such a big fan base, even if it's 1 of 1 of the diehards that are like Taylor. Swift. Broke up with her boyfriend. I'm breaking up with mine like that.
100 has happened all over the world. Yeah, yeah, so likewise, all dudes, if you're a real dude, you're not dating Taylor Swift this summer.
I stay in with a What's the name Joe Allen? Joe Allen? He's going to, he's going to release the best movie of all time, yeah.
There you go, go Joe Allen go. I just found out who you were like two days ago, but I've been a big fan for life. I didn't even know his name.
I just wrote.
Taylor Swift and her boyfriend broke up. It's just sad that that that walk down Cornelius Street will never happen again. No, no, uh, all right, your cool throne.
Uh, my cool throne is John Rahm's dad. Yeah, hank, you're stealing all of mine. That was, that was, that was my, that was going to be my cool throw, sorry.
Today can I take it? I have another one, I have another one. Cool Throne is John Rahm's dad.
Turns out still very much alive, so shout out John Rahm's dad. Right after the mass, he did so.
I got confused because Jim Nance was talking about how it was 70 by a steroids. His birthday. Seve, obviously a major champion Spanish golf icon. And I was. I was probably looking between screens at the time, and my brain morphed that all into one story. So John Rahm's dad is still very much alive early front runner for Still Alive Person of the Year.
You florian him? Yeah, so yeah, I mean, yeah, Florio's with Terry, Terry Bradshaw. At some point when Terry Bradshaw dies, Florio will have been the first to report it.
That's true. Um, hopefully, hopefully Mr. Rahm has a long life ahead of him. Can see his son when. Several more green jackets, yeah.
But still, we can allow us to be the first to report that. John Rahm's dad.
Is not dead? No, you allow us to be the first to congratulate John Rahm's dad on not being dead. Yeah, congrats, you did a huge thing.
You did it, a lot of people die all the time. You didn't. Yep, so think about that, survivor.
Yeah, absolutely tough as nails of of fake deaths, as reported by.
This podcast, he survived that shit. Yup, okay. Um, other cool thing was baseball.
Yeah, the pitch clock has been great. I've been a pretty known baseball hater, probably since, you know, the existence of this podcast. I played it a lot growing up, got super bored watching it as I got older, but I'm getting into it. I like, I like the speed of the games.
It makes it a lot more watchable. It's awesome. I've watched more baseball this spring than probably the entire last two years combined. They also changed another rule that goes along with the pitch clock rule, which is, uh, they're extending beer sales into the eighth inning now, which is huge because the game moves so much faster. People were getting cut off earlier.
Now you could also make the argument that, well, the eighth and ninth innings go by faster. So they should cut off the beer sales earlier because the same thing, not us. We would not make that argument, but I think the Brewers were the first team to extend beer sales into the eighth inning. So have you ever seen that, that list when they do, uh, like, the 20 drunkest cities and towns in America? And I think.
Like, 14 or 15 of them are in Wisconsin. Yeah, no, they do like a heat map of like, uh, the the drunkest people in America, and it's just it's like, bright, bright red in all of Wisconsin.
Yeah, people from Wisconsin are allowed to compete into like a bunch of Mexican drink like beer chugging competitions. When you go down there, it's just like there's signs, no one from Wisconsin. I think that's a joke, but yeah, no, that I saw. I saw a picture of the sign, but right? But it's like a resort joke.
Yeah, no, it's real. no, it's they have like, licensing and.
It's a rule, it's a regulated body. I don't know if Wisconsin still has this law, but for the longest time, the law was. If you're with your parent, you can, you can drink in the bar. Yeah, uh, I think it was over 18..
You could drink at the bar with your parent under 18.
You could be in.
Yeah, so in Texas, uh, I was a bartender down there for a little bit, you might've seen me in the in the Roadhouse commercial. But the law was that you can serve a drink to a kid as long as their parent orders it. So you can serve it to the parent. And then the parent can then hand the drink to the child and then they can drink it. How it should be done.
Yep, how it should be done.
Uh, what was? wait, what were you talking about? Oh, the baseball, baseball is, it is awesome, it goes by so much faster, the game has. It's what spent. What does it feel like 20 years that we've been talking about how to fix baseball?
And the answer has been steroids, but now they've figured it out that you don't have to just do steroids. Yeah, you can just make the basis.
Slightly larger and just go faster. Yep, but going double raise, greatest team in M.L.B. history, the what race double raise? Uh, who are spec history? Who picked them? That was my cool.
Throne. So they're two, they're 10 and 0 right now. uh, two teams have gone 13 and now that's.
The record? They're my, they're my World Series team, I put a future on them. Let's go, let's go.
Race we probably just drinks them. They're probably going to lose tonight, they're playing.
The Red Sox Maybe Hank did that on purpose. I also put a future on the cubs in a hundred to one, but whatever, uh, I think no, no, all right.
Nevermind, I've talked myself into the cubs, being scrappy enough to make the point. They're going to be sneaky, not bad, but I've now upgraded them to sneaky. Might make the playoffs.
I like that we've gone up the ladder, I also I like.
Tuning in and catching a stray Blue Jays game every now and again, just because of all the sons they have on that team, yeah, and they've got. I don't know if if Biggio is is starting for the Blue Jays or not. Cabin, but I saw him the other day, there was a highlight of him leaning into pitches. So they show, you know, how they do. The overlay of like, Bo Bichette and Dante Bichette, and like all the sons, the Guerrero comparison, where they show the swings back to back. They showed Cabin Biggio leaning into a pitch just like his dad used to do.
He's going to be the next great player to get hit by pitches, cause his dad was fucking elite at it. I love it. I was just going to say, go into the game now, kind of. It says it's shorter.
Like, I used to like how a baseball game used to be a whole day activity. Oh, see, I like, I like that. It's like a two and a half hour game is perfect. It was just like a good excuse to, like, get away.
You just got to drink more beforehand. yeah, you got to get drunk or spend more time at the.
Bar before the game. Also, the Cubs have the beer bats this year, which is sick if you put beer.
In a bat, I'm going to drink it also. Uh, I was going to use this as one of my cool thrones, but, uh, the Orioles, they are a team of destiny vibes. Because they have the dong bong, so I don't know if you guys seen this. They after they hit a home run, they come back at the dugout and they. They have a beer bong filled with water and you hit the dong bong. It's all like that is.
That's incredible. I'm also I don't want to turn over. Chain was great and then everyone's going to try and copy it, it's not going to be as great. But the dong bong, the dong bong is.
Fantastic. I don't want to pick on anyone in this room, but if I were going to, I'd say Philadelphia is a joke of a city. For not being able to come up with the Dong Bong first, they win the World Series with the Dong Bong last year. Oh, I thought you were going to say.
Cause they did a ring ceremony for coming in second place last year. I didn't know that they did a ring ceremony. Yeah, they, they gave everybody rings and on the ring. When you win the World Series, I mean, Hank, you can probably relate to this, you can relate to this because we've all won World Series recently.
Um, on the World Series ring, they typically have the scores of the games of the World Series. in this instance, they have the scores of all the.
Games and the NLCS, oh so, not the no hitter. No way this is a new thing. There's definitely teams that have done this.
Like, I legit got sent, I thought it was. I thought, Oh, this is a funny.
Fake thing. Ha ha ha. I didn't even give it any mind. Article You want to pin it? Not a ring.
Yeah, I get it, I get it. There should be a pin at ceremony, there's.
No, I need to do some research because I haven't done any research. I know for certain that this is just a normal thing, that all of a sudden this year people are trying to make a big deal. I wouldn't know.
We would have talked about it if any other team got did a second place.
MAX All right, I have a couple of questions for you, Max. True or false? You guys win the World Series with the dog ball? I don't. we are true or false.
You probably wouldn't. They had the Red Socks rally song True or False? The Dong Bong should have been something that happened in Philadelphia first. Yeah, probably true or false.
You got no hit in the World Series.
Fall Okay, true or false? You stole the Red Socks, a rally song for your team, and have an original one. It wasn't a no hitter.
It was a zero hitter. We've established that, but yeah.
The Dong Bong rules, you guys should all check it out. The Orioles are a very fun, young team that has, like, it's always awesome. Whenever a franchise that hasn't been good for a very long time has, like all their good prospects seem to come up at the same time, that's the Orioles, right?
Now Adley Rushman's awesome. My my hot seat is bars, putting bars on the hot seat. Because, um, YouTube just announced how much it was going to cost to do the Sunday ticket next year. Oh so, this is, it's moving forward. If you have YouTube two TV, it's going to be $349 for a season, $389 for a season.
If you bundle it with Red Zone, so Billy, that's a steal, it's. It's actually not that much different than the direct TV prices from the years before. But where it's going to get crazy for bars is, I don't know if you guys know, many bar owners or bar managers. But they're going to have to figure out how to get YouTube on all their TVs at once, and they are going to be completely lost. Week one of next year. What's that, Hank?
Well, no, that's not. That's a brings up, a good point. Do they have to have eight accounts? Is there going to be like, cause, couldn't you then hypothetically do that in your?
Own house with multiple TVs? Bars have to pay a different, like when bars buy direct TV, they have to pay a different price than everyone else, cause they're broadcasting.
For multiple people at once, yeah, so if you're, if you're an industrious young person out there and you're thinking of maybe how you can make money next year. Just show up like two hours early to a bar on Sundays and be like, I'll be your YouTube TV consultant and I'll figure out how to get all these games on all these TVs. Cause bar owners? Week one, it's going to be a.
What was the price? Uh, it's $349 per season, uh, $249 if you purchase before June 6th, and then $389 early if you if you bundle it with Red Zone. My math isn't exactly right. Cause?
Obviously there's some weird, like, you know, the Germany game and then there'll be like the Saturday Games. But it comes out to about like a dollar 30 a game, which is the greatest deal.
Of all time, yeah, but I thought I dropped the 80 for the YouTube TV and I had all the games. Or I'm totally wrong on that. You might've just been doing streams.
Yeah, bleep that out. People get mad if you give up their their shady streaming service. You had the local, you have whatever's.
Like on CBS or Fox, which is one game, there really is nothing like, uh, the the war. To to x out all the pop-up ads. When you get one of those streams, oh yeah, it's gotta go so fast.
Yeah, fuck, fuck, fuck. And then you got the chat on the side, the old school Justin TV guys know about the chat on the side. We were watching a San Diego Padres game in Lake Charles and it was using one of those streaming things. And just a giant black stripe across the center.
You couldn't even see the batter or the pitcher, or the catcher, you were just going off. Like, where the camera was falling, watching a walk-off home run with a giant black stripe across the center of the screen was electric. It was so fun. The other big problem with this is going to be that, um, I think, uh. Recurring guest Warren Sharp pointed this out.
YouTube, their UH streaming service, is about 54 seconds behind. It's got a lag behind reality, so people are going to be watching on all different. Yeah, shit's going to get spoiled.
We got to figure.
This out, we thought that with Amazon Prime Thursday nights, that wasn't really the case.
So maybe they'll fix it. But there was no other what, like you, people couldn't.
But you can still watch these games. Sometimes. Streams were still ahead.
But if everyone is on the same stream, it doesn't matter. What he's saying is like, you can watch your local team on regular TV and YouTube TVs. Behind, Yeah, and so it's going to be.
A problem? It's going to be the most chaotic. When we first moved to New York, I used to watch.
Bears games on my X-box, and it was like I'd be like a Siri, like a full set of downs behind.
Yeah, so it's going to be crazy the week one. If I'm so dumb, though, that if I see this, I'm going to watch the local game and I'm going to think I have an edge in live betting. No, I feel like, well, it hasn't gone out on YouTube yet, yeah.
Yeah, fuck, okay, okay, all.
Right, uh, all right, my hot seat is, uh, uga 11, so I don't know if you guys saw. Uga 10 uh, also known as k uh q q q u e uh, has retired, so I'll get 10 is the greatest Uga of all time.
Uga 10 won back-to-back national titles, Uga 10 went 84 and 15 as the mascot of the Georgia Bulldogs. It also evaded a bevo the longhorn. He also evaded Bevo the longhorn. Uh, the only other Uga that could be potentially in the Goat debate is Uga 3, who went 71 and 32 and also won a national title. But I think it's Uga 10 in a route now, Uga 11..
Like, how do you follow Uga 10?
They have to clone. Uga 10, it's, it's crazy. Uga 10 was the Goat Uga mascot. He saw the greatest years of Georgia football.
I also just started going down a little rabbit hole. Uh, of the Ugas, uh, uga, let's see eight. That was a sad one, he went four and two, and then, yeah, I got cancer. And his epitaph on the they all have, like, uh, their gravestones. I think in the stadium, his was just he never had a chance, which is pretty sad. That's pretty sad. Uh, I'll go for, uh, not not in the Goat debate, but still a very good Uga.
He was, uh, the dog of the decade, That's pretty fucking cool, cause he went from 81 to 90. Uh, what was the other one that was great? Uh, I believe it was, uh, oh, I'll go.
I'll Go Five was the one who bit the Auburn player. So there's some notable Ugas out there. And there was also, Oh, I'll go One was just damn good dog.
Yeah, hell yeah, like that, that was great. And then I'll get two is not a bad, not bad for a dog.
Oh, that's, that's, that's so mean to Uga, too.
Yeah, like that, you can't, you can't follow up with damn good dog you can't have.
Uh, he was okay, I just got. I just got really sad when I read, I'll go, I'll go, Uh, eight. He never had a chance. That's brutal, it's true, though.
What is he? Four and two, though, four.
And two, that's a pretty good record, yeah, four and two, uh. So he died mid season.
Uh, I think he came in mid season and died after the season, but uh, yeah, the Uga Uga 11 has.
It's I don't know how you follow that. I'm saying that you have to clone it. You can't just pass the torch immediately, you have to get a hair, you have to get some DNA.
Clone Uga 10 and then run that back. Yeah, the the the worst Uga one went, uh, uh, almost 50, a little over 50, so 53 and 48, he's, you could say he was the worst Uga overall record.
Wise he was, so that's tough. Numbers never lie.
Damn good dog, though, in his epitaph, Uh, all right, my uh cool throne is white. N.B.A. players.
So I don't know if you guys saw this. Deli, a comedian by the name of, Uh, Carl Tartt, joined a random league, Uh, for fantasy basketball. He's called an African-American. He joined a random league for fantasy basketball and drafted only white guys and won the league. Wow, yeah.
Pretty impressive. Well, they can shoot like Joel Embiid, he had, uh, yeah, he had Luca Tyler, Harrow, Hero, uh, Corey, Kispert, Porzingis, Vuchovic, Bogdanovich, Sabonis, Valanchunas. I mean, he just all white, Austin Reeves, I didn't, he didn't have.
Caruso needs to be on there, I was waiting for Caruso. C.J. McConnell, Uh, Lori Marketing on his bench, Dante Divincenzo on his bench, he had kispert on a starting lineup. Yeah, dude.
Kispert shooting the lights out. Yeah, so shout out Carl Tartt. I mean, what a he won the league, yeah.
Congratulations white dudes. That's why I'd never would've thought that would work in basketball. I did that one year in Fancy football, where I had, like, Danny Woodhead and all those guys. You know, all the white guys. Um, tough to win fancy football with all white guys, but still, I would imagine that it would be much, much harder to win fancy basketball. Yes, yes.
Now I need to try to do Fancy Hockey League where he has all Black guys. Yeah, uh.
Retired Yep, yeah, he sure is, um, yeah, okay.
All right, yeah, he's gonna try that also. Uh, Covid is over, so cool.
We did it, guys, we did it. They released a statement being like the the it's over sweet. The White House released a statement being like, the national emergency is hell.
Yeah, I don't know that. There has to be at least one fucking loser in, like, probably New York City, who just now is going to leave their house. Yeah, thank you, Joe.
Thank you, Joe, we finally.
There's one, uh, Montessori school, I think it's in New York, where they still have the kids that are masked up, like 24, seven. Or at least while they're at school and at lunchtime, they're not allowed to talk to each other, they're not allowed to sing happy birthday in class. Yikes.
So we did it, we did it. Covid is over, yep, Covid is over.
You're welcome, America. Funny, finally wrestled that bitch to the ground. Can't believe.
It's long, weirdest, longest, three years in terms of like, I don't remember someone was talking about the Bubble Championship in the N.BA. It's like that was so that feels like a hundred years that never happened.
Yeah, right, the Bubble Championship, I don't know what you're talking about. This is also prime, like all the you know memories you get from three years ago and people doing throwbacks.
This was like, peak, oh this, these, like last month was when it was the first, the first month of Covid, when it was kind of fun. It was like snow day. Tiger King Two.
All the all the celebrities singing, Imagine, Yeah, oh, actually, that's when Covid really was over, yeah.
That was Covid never had a chance once Wonder Woman started to sing John Lennon.
The first year, like second week of Covid, was actually kind of fun, cause it was like.
This is cool, we don't have to go. I had a great time until summer, then it then it was kind of annoying, yeah.
The best part about Covid was I got to watch Game of Thrones all the way through for the very first time. It was worth it, Covid was worth it.
Cause I would. That's a great series. Yeah, I won three national titles, yeah, worth it.
Uh, all right, Billy, the dozen started in Covid. Yeah, I came back. Oh yeah, all right.
Go.
Okay, pros and cons. Wait, does that mean national titles? PFT got to watch Game of Thrones.
Does that mean that Billy's off the show now? Yeah, that's it. Your watch has ended. You were. Thank you, Billy.
You got us through three tough years of American history. My hot seats. The Dalai Lama. Yeah, he was being a creep, he was a little kid to suck his tongue.
Uh, I did the research, it wasn't a mistranslation, nothing got lost in translation, it was just as.
Creepy as it sounds, it also, Uh, if, like, he's Dalai Lama, how old is Dalai Lama? I think he's 87, okay, so like old people, when they get to that age, they they forget when they're in public or when they have cameras on them.
He's definitely asking dudes to suck his tongue in private. Oh yeah, that's not the first time that it's ever happened. He's been asking people to suck his tongue for years, yeah.
I just if the Dalai Lama asked me to suck his tongue, I probably would do it just because, like, what if you get? what if you get Nirvana? What is the Dalai lama? So the Dalai?
Lama is like, I know, I know, I know. He's like, Oh, for anyone wondering out there, you know a guy. He's the religious leader of Buddhism, Tibetan Buddhism, so I thought, Buddhists can't speak. No, those are the monks, those are the monks, monks, Buddhists. Monks are sometimes Buddhist.
Yes, but there's those monks hank. This is crazy when when the Dalai Lama dies, they believe in reincarnation, so they have to go select a new Dalai.
It's kind of like, Uga, yeah, actually. They have to go select a new Dalai lama, and the way they do it is they get like a bunch of nominees. And then they, the other lamas, the other heads of this religion, and then they put these old artifacts that used to belong to the Dalai Lama in front of the kids.
And then the kid has to be like, Oh, I recognize this thing, and they're like, Oh, it's the reincarnation of the previous. That's probably exactly what they do with Uga.
Actually, take the old chew toys. So they put the Dalai Lama's tongue on the table. So I would be like, Oh, I recognize this, I should get people in the mix. I tried to do that.
I think that if.
You're, if you're this kid, you know, much like if the tree at the Masters had fallen on you. You have the best lawsuit of all time on your hands. If I'm this kid, I just demand to become the next. Dalai Lama. Yes, like, he selected me, that tongue selected me, that's what I'm saying.
Though, if the Dalai Lama asked me, I mean, it was, it's a kid, so it's fucked up. But if he asked me, a grown adult, I probably would suck his tongue just to see if I got something out of it. Yeah, what if I just had an eternal peace?
Maybe one tongue, maybe we should just look into the.
Whole, uh. Selecting old people to be leaders of religion for life and make them never have sex because it turns them into creeps. Maybe that could cross a couple of different religious platforms.
Wait, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on.
Are you saying that, uh, someone who has, like, complete and in total power, uh, and basically never gets second guess, might be taking advantage of their power? I would never say that, okay, all right, never said that.
He also has a Notes app. His apology Yeah, that was sad, because that was like, Dude, I I thought that you'd think that the Dalai Lama has got something better than the Notes app, yeah.
But yeah, total creep move, weirdo. And he definitely does it in private. You don't, you don't all, you don't wake up at 86. And however many months he is, it'd be like, today's the day I'm going to see if someone wants to suck.
My tongue, Yeah. I mean, if you're going to become the Dalai Lama, you would hope that if you have it, you don't. You just get chosen. Yeah, yeah.
But, even honest, he never had a choice. If you're chosen as a Dalai Lama and you've achieved eternal life, you've achieved nirvana. You should have a piece of technology that's one step up from, like a relief pitcher that gets busted for domestic violence. Like. The Notes app should not be your go-to at that point.
When was?
The first lama Buddha Buddha was the first lama. Now, Billy, I have a question for you. When you saw Dalai Lama asking for his tongue to get sucked, how quickly? In a matter of seconds or minutes? if you want to go minutes? I checked the flight logs.
No, were you like? No, were you like?
Joe Biden sniffs hair. Oh, it was very quick, it was, it was about 10 seconds, it was about 10 seconds, yeah.
I listen, I know your playbook, I got you my cool Thrones. Gamers Uh, turns out a bunch of gamers, uh, hacked the Pentagon and got special files. Yeah, that feels not so like as a joke.
Yeah, it was like hackers, they got into an argument, saying, well, it was. First. They found out that, uh, either you either die a gamer, or you live long enough to become a hacker. I would imagine most hackers are true. Oh, for sure.
Yeah, basically, in a gaming discord, two gamers got into an argument about, uh, political issues. So one of them just hacked the Pentagon and got files that supported his side of the argument and leaked a ton of documents that now have been spread across the world. Respect, yeah.
And he won the argument, those.
Are our documents? And I bet you he changed that guy's mind. He probably did. Yeah, definitely. That's how all internet arguments end.
Yeah, you always change the other person's mind when you.
Play with them online. Yeah, if you just if you produce enough facts, you eventually the person that you're fighting with, they come over to your side. Today's the day I'm going to go online and.
Change everyone's mind, says everyone who talks about politics on Twitter every day. I dare.
Somebody to debate me today on whether or not John Rom's dad is dead, because I will win that.
Fucking argument. The 600th tweet about this subject will finally sway that. Uh, all right.
JAKE Uh, my hot seat is. Parade celebrations. Senator Richard Blumenthal fractured his femur at the Yukon Parade. Oh no, after a fellow parade goer tripped and fell on him.
He got up and finished the parade, but then got surgery. How heavy was that person?
That's a femur, that's, that's a tough bone to break. Yeah, that doesn't, unless he was.
Is he weak? Is he got weak femurs? I don't know. is he got a femur problem? That was the.
The Democratic update from Jake Live of the year. Sure, uh, my cool throne is me putting.
Myself on the cool throne because Elon just tweeted Final date for removing Legacy Blue.
Checks is four 20.
That's so funny, so do you get it? Yeah, So are you going to redouble your blue check?
Okay, but like, you guys might have to do it, okay, all right, yeah.
Probably not.
Yeah, if you wake up on four 20 or four 21, you already sold out, you'll sell out again once you.
Just got one I can explain. Hey, I did this motherfucker. I did an experiment. I did an experiment. I got a grow. You know, it was a bit. No, no, it was an experiment.
I wanted to see, I wanted to see if the uh, like the engagements, did go down. So I did this experiment where I grew a sasquatch in a bucket of water. It was like, Well, you know, this figurine sounds very scientific. So, like I did day over day and looked at the engagement. For each post, similar post is just a picture of a thing growing in a bucket. And every time it grew like, people be like, Oh, look, progress.
And it, it was doing consistently through a couple of days, and then one day the engagement was terrible on it. And then eventually people were like, Okay, we get it. Billy's got a figurine in a bucket. But I kept growing.
So and then you bought Twitter Blue, and then I was like, I bought Twitter Blue.
And the engagement went back up to the numbers it was doing before.
So I was like, I'm not saying I won't buy Twitter Blue. I'm saying I'm going to wait to see if he takes it away. I think that's what I want to risk it. No, that's my point. It's like, I'm going to just keep, I'll keep playing this game of chicken.
If he takes it away and it's like, I need this for my job, I will buy it, but I'm not gonna. I'll play the chicken with them.
I might, I might just wait to see what the prevailing sentiment online is. And if enough people are making fun of people that buy Twitter Blue, then I won't buy it. But it does hurt your engagement currently, like even though you still have it, the fact that you're not paying, it hurts your engagement.
You guys don't have to worry about.
That but, like Hank, did, call you a sellout.
Oh, I know, but somebody forced. Hank also had a blue check mark at one point, yeah, and people forget, got it taken away instantly.
Yeah, I did that, like, three times you sold out, and then the last time they did it, you wanted the Verified Mentions tab.
The last time they did it to me, they forced the blue check mark on me, it's okay. And then we got an email asking us if people wanted to get verified, and you said, yes, I couldn't get rid of it, hank.
I tried so very hard. They mean nothing, though Instagram now Instagram used to be the Instagram was hard, like it took me a long time to get verified.
I tried to go through the proper channels.
Why did you want to get verified on Instagram versus Twitter? Hank?
Chicks Okay, well, goddammit, he just. I've been working on this story for two years and he just went and said it.
But now anyone can buy it, so it's worthless. Yeah, it used to be worth something for chicks.
But it's not even about that. Like, right, I tweeted something yesterday about.
Now they're going to think that I bought it, which is actually worse.
I tweeted something about the hockey game and I can go past the character limit.
That part sucks. 10 minute videos, No, that part sucks. I can tweet this whole segment, dude people, I like Twitter threats.
There's like an illusion to it, like.
What is he going to say next? But if you're like 20 or 30 over, it's nice.
Very important threat alert. Yeah, I want to know what like.
Oh, I'm waiting on bated breath. Is he going to really say that he emotionally cheated on his girlfriend and owes her money? Like, what's going to happen next?
Yeah, you remember the, uh, the siren that goes off at the start of a very important thread and then at the end you can. Just my favorite is when you skip the entire thread and just go to the end. And at the end, the guy's like, So.
Therefore, I did not come on my cat. yeah, never was near my cat. I also can post full length 10 ADP like graphic animal videos, okay?
That's probably where I was then. That actually is sick. Uh, okay, good hot seat.
Cool thrown everyone for 20, that's so funny.
That is so funny. Uh, all right, let's get to our interview. we have a great interview. Adam Richman, you might remember, a man versus food guy is electric, has a wealth of knowledge about everything.
Had a great time with him in studio. Before we do that. PFT, you got a quick.
Word from one of our sponsors Yeah, before we get into this interview with Adam Richman, want to talk to you guys about Chevy? You know, we're truck guys through and through the Chevy. Silverado has been a partner with unstoppable grit and determination.
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Com learn more, and now here's Adam Richmond.
Yeah.
Okay, we now welcome on a very special guest. It is Adam Richmond. You may remember him from a man. Verse food. He is now on the History Channel and he has a bunch of new shows.
Yeah, watch the food that built America. uh, you have watched it. is it toys that built America as well?
Toys that built America Two seasons of that Sunday Nights, Nine, Eight Central is Food that built America. Uh, Monday's at 10 with Peyton Manning.
It's called the greatest of all time, and Rebels that built America is coming up. That's awesome because I, I like I was reading.
All the things you're doing right now. I was like, these all sound like shows I want to watch, thank.
You man, yeah, they definitely don't suck, like I like most people. I'm like, I dig history. But when it's these really cheesy AV squad reenactments where everything feels like the Hall of Presidents at Disney World, whatever, no one learns anything, and everyone just kind of tunes that garbage out.
And to, to, actually, like, have, be part of a show where, like, that's kind of gritty and real. And like, you see Dr. Kellogg giving his brother orders through the bathroom door while he's dropping a deuce. I was like, Hell, yes, this is real.
This is the real shit and like.
That's really what happened. So so what's your from all your history channel stuff that you've been doing, working on? What's your favorite story or episode that you've done thus far?
That's a great question, you know? This season is actually really dope because, and fitting that I'm here with my fellow Stoolies. That, um, we go into sporting goods a little bit. And people are like, why is it in food that built America? People don't realize. Wilson Rawlings They all started because of the surplus leather that they had a slaughterhouses. In fact, the milk bone started because of surplus milk at a slaughterhouse. The same inventor that would go on to invent margarine and unleaded gasoline got a bunch of milk dehydrated.
It saw that his dogs were kind of into it, made a biscuit, they couldn't give a shit. He molded it into the shape of a bone, and they almost took his fingers off, and that was the milk bone. But I think that the thing with, um, like the sporting goods episode, like, I didn't realize that fans used to think that players were kind of like pussies.
If they just, they wore gloves and they didn't catch the ball barehanded. So guys were buying work gloves, putting cotton wadding in them and painting them flesh tone with fingernails on it. So it looked like they were catching it. And I was like, you know, Scrooge edition hockey was traditionally played without helmets. Doesn't make it a good idea.
But I also love, and we were talking about your incredibly delicious coffee. Not paying to say it yet. No, I'm just kidding, I'm breaking stones, but the thing is, we were talking about the name and that's the thing I love this season.
We talk about chick-fil-a and Popeye's, and I never really knew the story. I never knew that chick-fil-a started as a menu item at Waffle House. Oh, I never knew that Popeye, actually, the uh, big al who created it. He actually got sued by, you know, the whole Mel Blank thing, and he said, No, no, no, no, no, it's about Popeye Doyle, the Gene Hackman character in French Connection.
What he's like, Yeah, that's it. Sydney with Curtis Candies babe Ruth tried to sue him for the candy bar. He's like, No, no, no.
Baby Ruth is about Grover Cleveland's baby daughter Ruth. Oh my god, that's genius and I didn't even know this. One of the cats by. And when I look, this is from this season. There's just the peanut butter episode is really, really, really good.
And not just for, like, single guys who have a dog. I'm saying that the Peanut Butter episode is actually really kind of enlightening. And that one of the dudes who built Peter Pan was screwed over by the government and by his partner, and he pivoted and created Skippy. And to this day, he has never paid the J.M. Barry Estate one freaking penny for the name Peter Pan.
That's crazy, that's awesome. Yeah, good for that guy, right? Isn't there a crazy story behind how?
Cornflakes were invented, too, a hundred percent. And it involves the Kellogg's, the one guy dropping a dookie while his brother's talking, but it's the truth Dr. Kellogg had the battle. Creek Sanitarium, Michigan.
And it wasn't like sanitarium, meaning like people losing their sanitary, but it was no, it was meant to be like a place to go for wellness. And he also had, like, his fixations against red meat masturbation, the whole thing. In fact, there's a movie called The Road to Wellville where Anthony Hopkins plays that kind of character. But anyway, he would make them do marches.
Anyway, the short version is this. His younger brother, the younger Kellogg, was the real innovator. And they would make this kind of mush, this sort of grain mush, like this, paste well. Some of it had been left on a roller overnight, and he cranked it in the morning when it was dry. And it made these flakes. And people loved it more. So, he said, Screw it, happy accident.
Let's keep making it. And people were loving it. Well. There was one executive named CW Post, whose company sent him there to, like, chill out and not be an angst ridden fuck. And can I say that?
Sorry, and I apologize to A and e network. I know how we do and no. And so CW Post stole the formula and he created Postum and there was this big race.
And actually, between the two Kellogg's, that's what created corn flakes. The K was actually from his signature Coca-cola. That's the accountant's signature, and it's. It's kind of wild when you see these like little tiny things like.
I never knew, like I never knew before doing this show. That Hydrox not only came out before the Oreo, but the name comes because they wanted to try to evoke purity, cause they had been fired from Nabisco. And these guys were like, screw you guys, and they wanted to evoke purity. So they took water, hydrogen, and oxygen became hydrox, and.
Like, this season is like, that's awesome. Yeah, I mean, I just always don't know them as shitty.
Oreos Right, right, they were the first ones. It's like the nit versus.
Yeah, right, but this?
Is like, all these things that happen out of accident. They were the Kwame Brown of Oreos.
Exactly, yeah, is he? Yeah, he goes after him.
He's about that life. Yeah, you don't want to talk.
With guys that I'd like to see, no, I would like to apologize. You crossed the line. How about the rapper Kwame with the polka dots? No, no, no, no.
Listen, we got. listen, we'll hop in with you. No, I'm on Kwame. No, no, kwame Brown is Hydrox. I'll be in there with you.
We'll go back to back.
Can I go? Can I go Brady Quinn? Can I, Can I go Colt McCoy? Yeah.
With with corn flakes, I've.
Always wondered about those, because when they came out, people were like, God damn, these things are delicious. But corn flakes objectively suck, don't they? They're? They have about four seconds.
Where they're, it's kind of like, Big League chew, right? Yeah, and and even that's like the sickest story. It's actually fitting to talk about it. That was in a I had done a show for History Channel called Adam Eats the Eighties, but even Big League Chew, that was a that was a relief pitcher for the Portland Mavericks, owned by Bing Russell.
Who's 16 year old son Kurt Russell played for the team. There's that that movie Battered Bastards of Baseball is about it. But this dude saw a bat boy chewing some like shredded black stuff, and he knew his mom. He's like, Todd, I'm going to break your arm.
What are you doing? your mama kick your ass or she knew you were chewing tobacco? He's like, No, no, no, no, no.
It's licorice, I shredded licorice, and that's where they had the idea about, they said, Why did you do that? He said. I want to feel like I'm in the big leagues. And then so this one guy, Rob Nelson, turns to Bob Nelson, whichever you call Nelly, turns to Jim.
Bout me, rest in peace. And for me, Yankee pitcher says, What about shredded chewing gum? what would you call it? He goes, I don't know, big league chew.
And they made the first batch in the kitchen of a lady named Candy Field. She's still alive, she still lives in Portland, and her son is Todd Field, who just directed Tar, the one from Cape Blanchett erected in the bedroom.
It's the crazy, all these stories about the food is nuts, so it's amazing.
But when, when? When Cornflakes came out, was it a revelation? Where people like, Oh my God, was food so bad in America at that time that this was like a holy shit moment?
Like flakes, a hundred percent. Well, because, remember, back in the day, most breakfasts were usually leftovers. The idea of a breakfast industry was really not heard of. And, like, food safety. The crazy thing is that it wasn't until the eighties, which we really hit in this season with.
Like Reagan said, you could advertise directly to children. And you have. Like this arms race between General Mills and Kellogg's, so suddenly General Mills does cheerios. Kellogg's has this crappy cereal called Okays, where the pieces are O's and K's. So the guy says, screw that.
William Lamoff says No more case, let's just do the O's and let's make them fruit flavored. He chooses the toucan. Ironically enough, a toucan has no sense of smell, but because of the colored loops, and what's crazy is fruit loops.
Don't take, don't have an individual taste. Your mind makes you think that the orange tastes like orange, yellow tastes like lemon or banana. No, that's not.
True, they're all bullshit, they all taste. Tell us that green green m&ms don't make you horny. I mean, they make me horny.
Yeah, they do, they're not any more scientific facts. They nerfed her.
Yeah, they took away her high heels and her butt. Yeah, yeah, but like, that's only if you're like.
Rubbing one out to the actual animated. But if you're out there, I don't know. I've been seeing newscasters get pretty salty, like we want our go-go boots on, give me my fucking hot m&m back.
Give me the Lola bunny with the ass. So how? How do you have all these facts in your head now?
Cause this, this, you know everything. It's very thoughtful of you to say that, man. I guess, you know, I really love, like, the culinary anthropology of it. And the thing is, you know, I'm a third generation American. My grandparents came here with neither pot to piss in or window to throw it out of. And you read about like wrote.
Like, like the woman who ran Totino's right, she and her husband had, like, so many jobs. She busted her ass. She actually, this is a true story. She wanted a loan for a pizzeria.
No one in America knew what a pizza was. She had to make a pizza, bring it to the guy at the bank for him to try the pizza, to get the loan. That must've blown his mind, right, exactly.
Like, you know, like in that movie yesterday, like, imagine being the first fucking person to hear someone play, let it be like the first person to try pizza. So he naturally writes her alone, but people forget she was so poor during the depression. She used to hide and go back in her schoolyard after everyone left to find orange peels to eat. The little bit of pulp off of, that's how hungry she was. And she went on to become the very first executive in the entire history of. I believe it was, um, was either Pillsbury or General General Mills at that point and made millions of dollars on this.
In fact, everything, even the Gino's pizza roll, became like under the Totino's brand. And it's just this like, I guess I really love, like, the individual stories, like, Yeah, I didn't know that famous Amos discovered Simon and Garfunkel, or that he was an agent with William Morris. That he got his first, the first three people that cut him a check to open the first famous Amos store. At that sketchy end, the sketchy end of sunset, let the eastern end of sunset, where shit gets a little real. Um, yeah, it's like it was Helen Reddy, Marvin Gaye and everyone's favorite mixologist, Bill Cosby. Oh man.
That's crazy.
That is wild. Yeah, I mean, you've already blown my mind like seven times with with with the facts that you've just dropped on us. So I'm looking forward to to watching that. What would you say is would be the one food if you were to like, zoom in on one that really.
Represents America. Oh, what a great, great question, great question. Oh, thank you. The low main microwavable dinner.
Oh, okay, yeah, because the eighties was such a shift. Remember we had reaganomics, so it was a switch of supply side economics. Tons of money floods the market first decade that has two, two parents working.
So you have latchkey kids able to let themselves in cocaine, you have an f okay, yeah, right.
Big shoulder pads Big shoulder pads.
Crazy hair, crazy hair, right? So then the other thing is, you have advertisers advertised directly to children. You now have a kind of modality that the kids can cook with. Like parents didn't want kids working with flame and knives and stuff, but a microwave. You put the damn thing in, you press a couple buttons.
So a latchkey. Kids suddenly had agency and could say, I want to eat this, I want to eat that. So the microwave technology changed it, and I feel that like the microwave dinner, as it has changed. Like as certain flavors, like back in the day, is like a little fat fucking Brooklyn.
My mom would buy Stouffer's lean cuisine because she was working a bunch of jobs and it was just easy, and she knew calorically. I wasn't really pummeling my body with garbage. But now you find all tortellini and and artichoke bottoms and you know, curries and all kinds of things. It's incredible and it's. But it's a direct correlation to where American tastes are at the time.
Like, Swanson only created the Turkey dinner, cause there was a surplus of Turkeys, he had too many.
Turkeys and didn't know what to do with it. Yeah, isn't it true? Like, there's? I listened to an interview, I think it was our guy, Eddie, who did it, uh, with dog walk.
He interviewed a guy who, uh, was a butcher, and he said that, like ham used to be the meat and then turkey just completely took over for him. Sometime in the last, like 20 years.
Well, you know how it is. It's like, the funniest thing is, we did an episode early in March called Flight of the Buffalo Wing Right, and everyone always assumes it's the anchor bar in Buffalo.
We come to find there was a Black man named John Young who lived on Jefferson, which was essentially the Black main street in Buffalo. He was doing a version of what people in D.C. know as mumbo sauce wing. So if you're going to compare, like, the hot wing is hot sour butter, whereas hot sour sweet is the mumbo sauce wing. And then, when racial violence gripped Buffalo, he and his family went to Tulsa and then Chicago. And then the Bellissimo's got the credit.
But what's even crazier is that wings were considered shit. wings were the thing you used for a soup, the thing is used for a sauce, right? No one wanted it. And then this simple thing made it this incredible bar snack.
And it never was a big thing. Like you were talking about that. Ham turkey substitution as we learn more things. You know, you know, when I grew up, people were eating veal, no one cared. Then suddenly this cruelty thing and our knowledge of veal changed, and then we wanted a different protein.
And I think, I don't know. I think what's also crazy is to see how we've been manipulated. Yeah, there's an episode about booze and we talk about the Moscow mule. And what's crazy is this guy is like, how in the fuck do we sell a Russian spirit to America in the middle of the Cold War?
And so he goes to a bar in Hollywood. The owner of the bar is making his own ginger beer. And he's also just started hanging out, dating, sleeping with this actress who's just inherited a copper mine and a copper fortune. So he says, Listen, let's make the drink with your ginger beer, your copper mugs, my vodka and a lime, and then we're going to make this thing.
And he was one of the first people to have one of those instamatic polaroids, so he would go to all the bars in Hollywood going. I'll give you a picture that you could take home to your wife if you try serving my drink.
It's wild, yeah. Things change just based on how they're being marketed. It's a good marketing firm behind it. Like, you'll buy, you'll buy anything, and you won't even know why you're doing it.
It's crazy, like I read, that lobsters used to be peasant food a hundred percent. lobster was served to prisoners a hundred percent.
Why did that change? I forget the story behind it.
Well, the funny thing was, there's even a law on the books in Maine that you can't feed lobster to prisoners more than three times a week. So they're essentially cockroaches, they are, they have the exact same neurological system as a cockroach, and they used to just wash up in mounds.
And that's exactly why they were considered poor people. Food like, I'm from Brooklyn. You drive over the Bell Parkway and you would see people fishing off the Bell Parkway and people would go, Oh, how ghetto, how gross, how whatever.
It's like, they're not paying for dinner tonight. How ghetto is that, right? But the thing was because it was so plentiful, and because it was understood to sort of be a bug of the ocean. No one cared about it once it became less available, and once other chefs started going, Oh, this is a really delicate, flavorful.
They gentrified bugs. Yeah, they gentrified bugs. You're not wrong. That's kind of the crazy thing.
And now it's a felony to rob someone's lobster pot. And there's a rule you have to make the door of a lobster pot biodegradable, so if a lobster goes into an abandoned pot. It's not like a death sentence. They can still get out, but it's this deeply beloved thing. But it's a really cool thing that you know that. And it's even wild when you begin to realize how. For example, Pepsi folded before World War II because Coke got the contract for sugar.
And it was only after the war that someone revitalized the Pepsico brand. Herman Lay said that potato chips were an essential thing, and he got the contract that a bunch of chip manufacturers went down. Hector Boyardee spelled B-o-i-a-r-d-e-e, who then, of course, changed it to Boyardee. He used his canning stuff to make rations for the U.S armed forces in World War II.
So you begin to see how the little historical things change. That's crazy, I mean, it's.
Fascinating. So in terms of your career, man versus food, I know that's a thing of your past, but we all loved it. Thank you man, loved the show. Thank you bro.
I actually got upset with you when you lost all that weight. I just want to get that out in the open. I did write a blog being like, Fuck Adam Richman, why'd he lose all this weight? You were supposed to be the guy that we all looked up to because you had the dream job.
So bygones be bygones on that, but yeah.
I wasn't upset, wasn't that because I was still eating? I just wasn't eating like that while I was losing weight, yeah.
I just remember you took a cover photo. Well, no, I took a centerfold, but that wasn't why. So they have a thing in Manchester at Old Trafford, where Manchester United plays every two years, called Soccer Aid. And it's celebrities and former pros from England versus celebrities and former pros from the rest of the world. Playing soccer on the pitch, on television, and I played a whole bunch in my youth.
And so I dieted for two years with the sole goal of playing for soccer aid, so that was my goal. That wasn't about fat shaming or wasn't.
About.
No, I know it wasn't. I was a stupid blogger. I was just like, you have the dream job, go back and eat.
Because I used to watch your show and be like, that looks like an awesome place.
Well, that was the dope thing. That looks like an awesome place. Well, that was the thing even while filming man vs. food and man vs.
Food Nation. When I had that kind of discipline, it made me aware a of how many calories those things were. But my cheat meals were built into my schedule, so I'd work out, I'd do a shake and then go to a place and have. Because I knew, basically, I would take a bite in three different focal lengths, they would do a two shot of me and the chef.
One where they would follow the burrito up from the plate, one where it's a wide shot of me biting the burrito and one of me doing it. And then jizzing and like, Oh, it's so good afterwards. So I knew that I had at least four bites. So generally speaking, if you're keeping a low diet, four or five bites of a mega King Kong burrito, you're good. So how did you get into that?
Was that your idea? I auditioned, Oh, you auditioned, and I never had done a food challenge before my final screen test.
I went to Yale for my drama degree and I got signed by agency. Totally, I mean, have you not heard the dorky ass facts of it spraying out totally totally?
And I lost my glasses. No, I mean, I say that lovingly, because we couldn't sniff an Ivy League school. No one in this room. I'm the first member of my family. Oh, yeah.
Billy went to Williams, He.
Counts that as an Ivy League school? I'm the first, but, like I say, I'm lucky to have done it. But I got signed by agents out of the school. And, uh, I read this book called The Renaissance Soul Life Design for people with too many passions to pick just one. And it was really like, I liked it because it wasn't like esoteric, hippy dippy bullshit, it was much more like real exercises.
That, like, made you answer there was no, like, I'm not sure you had to have a definitive answer about things, and I'm not kidding you. I did this reverse flow chart exercise and it came to.
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