NFL Preview With Pete Prisco, Jets RB Dalvin Cook, Pancakes Only Draft And The Return Of Jimbos

Hey, Pardon my take listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube Prime. members can listen ad free on Amazon Music. On today's Part of My Take. We have a twofer for the people.

It's like, you can't complain about it, cause it's free content, right?

Exactly, it's at the very end, it's after the first. I love you guys, so it's like, it's you. If you complain about it, you're a pervert.

If you're one of those guys that likes to hear us sit around and just say names for about 30 minutes nonstop, then you're going to fucking.

Love, we've got a draft for you.

You're going to love the pancake. All protein bars generally tastes the same, but not one bars. One made protein bars are actually delicious, with Reese's and Hershey's only one Reese's peanut butter lovers.

Okay, let's go.

Now in the street, there is violence and lots of work to be done.

No place to hang out or wash in. And then again, all on your son.

Oh, no, we're going to rock down to Electric Avenue and then we'll take it higher.

Oh, we're going to rock down to electric.

It's part of my take. There's been about martial sports.

Well, welcome to part of my take. Today is Wednesday, September 6th and PFT. They are testing us on what they are testing us with the Kansas City chiefs first.

Wait, has Adam Schefter said anything about his knee about to explode?

No, he is not okay, it is that's Albert Breer is it's going to explode. Juju Smith Schuster. But they're testing us.

Oh, in 17, we can't. Oh, in 17, I'm, I listen. Chris Jones is the one that wanted the hyper extension. Yeah, that's what, that's what he's been going for. Uh, Kelsey, unfortunately, we've been talking about the Chiefs, and you'll hear our interview with Pete Prisco in a second.

I'm they're doing it.

I'm going lines, money line, I'm going I am too money line.

I already was doing that, but I'm saying, like, for a season long. The chiefs are basically right at the buzzer, saying, Hey, let's invite all the doubters. Let's have this doubt creep in so that we can have that rat poison in the locker room.

Was Billy right about Travis?

Kelsey run soft.

Maybe I don't know.

Yeah, I don't know, we got to see the tape.

I gotta, I gotta find out how it happened, what?

Trust the reminder.

No, no, Jake, Jake, Jake, Jake, Jake, shut the fuck up. You also said, Don't trust the reminder.

Yes, you said for week one, don't trust the reminder, yeah.

But Chiefs to win the West is not a week one reminder.

I'm I don't know what to do, I don't know what to do.

Hank, tell us what to do.

Lines, money, line, No, no, no, no, no.

That's already been decided, that's been decided months ago. I was like, I love I. This is going to be a coming out party.

What past you wanted me to tell you? current you?

No, we're all betting the lines on Thursday, which is a terrible, terrible thing for the line.

I'll do respect. Past me was a shithead.

Yeah, he's an idiot.

You know how dumb I used to be.

He's a moron, he's a fat fucking bitch. That's what Passed Me is new. Me is smart, chiseled, diligent. Give me another adjective.

I'm not sure what steadfast means.

I am telling you guys what to do.

I'm just telling you what you wanted current you to do extra diligence.

Yeah, but listen, I'm not going to get bossed around by past me. I currently is the alpha.

Also, I'm not going to get bossed around by past me via Jake.

Yeah, true.

Like, that's the worst.

Like, wait, did, did I really did? I really think that I was going to be able to boss future me around by being like, Hey, Jake, remind future me that I wanted you to do this.

No, but teacher, you didn't assign homework? That's what you're doing to us right now. Throw it all out.

That's the one thing that Jake actually gets offended by when you say that he was the teacher, those people.

And you guys think I'm one of them?

I mean, you were, were. were you teacher?

You forgot to collect homework.

No.

Were you teacher? Here's an apple. I love you.

No.

Were you call your teacher, your mom, everyone was that you actually. Oh, everyone, are you kidding me? I never done that really.

Were you teacher? I was the only one that did the assignment in my group project.

No.

There was a little bit of a delay on that one. No, because, Jake, I remember the powerpoint that you put together, you and Memes, but Memes name was not on time.

That's past me, as you mentioned, idiot.

Yeah, idiot, moron.

So yeah.

Either way, we can't fall for it.

I think I'm going to fall for it a little bit.

Okay, well, we're going to fall for it on Thursday.

So here's one thing that I will trust past me on. Do not believe the C words, do not believe their lies, right? I am not going. If I'm going to move off the Chiefs, I'm not going to the team in Los Angeles.

There was a report.

So what's my other option? am I going to go with the Broncos?

There was a report today that Sean Payton said, Uh, told Uh, Russell Wilson to stop with this Russell Inc. bullshit.

He said, Will you fucking stop kissing all the babies? You're not running for office? That might be an Epstein Island thing. It sounds like some Bill Clinton used to do, but he should be standing.

With his dogs in the woods, yeah.

Would you rather? would you rather be on the airplane that had the shit all over it, or on the airplane going across the Atlantic? With Russell Wilson doing high knees?

Definitely the shit we saw, the shit by the way. Um, it was exactly what I thought everywhere. it was literally everywhere. It was like, when people are like, how could this be a biohazard?

If it was, I feel like it was a guy, it would have come out, it was a guy. Women don't poop, that's the thing.

So they do diarrhea, Yeah, they do, uh, let's. It was a guy, it was definitely. We think this is our misogyny showing. I love, like, maybe the next Barstool hit piece.

It's 2023.

Yes, uh, so whoever this was, I think they were wearing shorts and maybe not underwear, so that's how it happened.

It looks like, judging by the splatter pattern, if we're putting on like, our, uh, Dexter hats here, you ever seen that show, Hank Dexter?

Well, you don't want to do the splatter pattern here.

He judges the blood pattern and can tell you exactly how the murder went down. I was analyzing it through Dexter's eyes. And it looks like somebody got up out of their seat and then pooped and then ran down the aisle while pooping. With shorts on, with shorts on. But I think it was, I think it was a sprint, and it reminds me of that old George Carlin thing. There are certain things you will never see in your life. That's a grown man running while taking a shit. I think on that plane, there was somebody sprinting down the aisle and as their ass was going back and forth, back and forth running, it was shooting left.

Right, and I also, uh, analyze this, watch the video many times. I think if we had to make a composite of the person, it is a gentleman. I would say about 230 to 50 pounds. Five, eight ish, wearing very loose, fitting cargo khakis, you know, the loose ones. And he's got, if he's not, if he's wearing underwear, he's wearing the old school boxers, the gas box.

You're, you're almost describing Pete Prisco now.

A little bit of a pete's not as heavy.

He's also not five, eight.

Yeah, he's not, he's definitely not five, eight. But I'm saying, like, there's enough movement in the shorts, where it's the old school boxers that don't, not boxer briefs, that the splatter is allowed to go everywhere. It's like a Jackson Pollock.

I was, I was with you until you said the cargo shorts. I think that that material is too, it's too firm. Well, I would say like athletic shorts, old school gym shorts.

You got to remember, this is a person going from Atlanta to Barthelona. Uh, probably the cargo shorts to keep the passports, the kids stuff, like, he's probably, he's wearing maybe a fisherman's vest, like one of those dads.

It was coming from Atlanta, though, right? Yeah, so it might've been Jean Shorts. We might be working with Jorts here.

Although those also could be a little bit tighter to the yeah, it could.

Have been a girl in short shorts.

No, no, definitely not a girl in like juicy booty pants that would wreck.

I haven't ruled out the pilots either.

Oh, just because of the length.

Like, how did it get it covered? It did somehow cover the whole point.

What about it? what about a stewardess?

The only way for it to cover the whole point is if it started at the top.

Are you not allowed to say stewardess?

Uh, you can say whatever.

I think it's steward stewardess, it's a flight attendant. Oh, an fa. yeah, what about an FA?

You can say, you can say whatever it could have been, it could have been an inside job. That would make a lot of sense, wouldn't it not?

It could be the dog, because like the dog starts, does the squat, and then you're like, go run, run and then just starts pooping everywhere.

Dogs poop and run all the time. Yeah, this is the number one sports podcast in America.

Yeah, we're, we're breaking it down. I mean, it was the number one story.

Yeah.

It is 24 hours.

I think that's sports that counts, as I'll tell you what, this is a bad omen for the jets. Yeah, I don't think it could start off any, any worse.

And the browns and the Browns, both of them bad, fade, both of them. Yep, it's, it's a bad combo. Memes. You should be worried now.

Yeah, hard Knocks is over, we watched it, we totally watched it, so I'm in the habit of watching Hard Knocks about two days late during the weeks.

I haven't watched after episode two.

I have to admit it's it's not bad, it just makes you fall in love with Garrett Wilson. And you're going to get more rosy colored glasses with the Jets because it does make you think that they can do something. I still go back to the fact that the offensive line doesn't look great and it is hard to switch to a new team.

You know, what it is for me is, uh, I'm obviously, you know, all in on. Aaron Rogers never said a bad thing about him. Might be a bit whatever, uh, watching it, it's like, I'm getting poisoned by the bit. So like, if I have to watch more Aaron Rogers and be like, Oh, he's the best. I'm going to start like, my body's going to start rejecting it.

You're at, you're at the stage where you're like, you know what? I really, really like smoking weed, but I need to stop because I like it so much. And I'm just going to forget about everything else. And I'm going to my entire life is going to be based around weed, yeah.

Like, my brain is like, Oh, this is funny to just reverse and troll packers, fans and my whole body. And everything that is learned is like, you can't like this guy. So I have to keep my distance so that I can keep enough distance to be like, Oh, yeah, I love Aaron Rogers.

Yeah, I remember, I remember everything that I hated.

Every flashback will start hitting me.

Yeah, it's, uh, I'm very excited for this football season. I don't remember the last time that I've been this excited. no way, I'm super excited.

I think we're all like every football season at this exact moment. Uh, I'm at a hundred out of a hundred, it's every single year.

I'm 500.

I don't think I've ever been more or less excited than I am.

Every single, I'm infinity out of a hundred. Not only are these cool new teams, cool new storylines, but also for the first time in 25 years. I actually get to be happy and proud of my own team that I get to root for. It's this the N.FL fucking rocks.

Yeah, it's the best.

It is the best.

It is the best.

Um, there was a story that just came out an hour ago. Did you see this about the Dolphins? Quarterback coach Daryl Bevel? Uh, no. So he suffered a detached retina during training camp. This is from Jory Epstein.

He told Yahoo Sports that it's you need, you need to hurt. Like, go to the ends of, uh, every health, everything that a doctor ever tells you to just keep doing your job with football.

Yeah, this, it looks like a milking table for your eyes. Yeah, he's just staring down at the game. The All 22,.

And it's very funny when you say that, because if you just change your perspective a little bit. So he's a detached retina, still doing his job, being commended for doing his job. If you made this like a Twitter thread about a startup in San Francisco, there would be 10,000, uh, Twitter handles with roses in their handle. Being like, this is toxic work culture, well, there would all. That's just football, baby.

There, there definitely would be people being like, I can't believe that you make your employees do this. There would also be a bunch of guys with the, uh, the NFT dot ETH being like, This is, this is a fucking warrior, right? This is a grind set, grind set never stopped working, never stopped the.

Commitment, having that debate because I would like to be on the side of the NFTs and be like, No, it's football. This is what we do.

Well, also, if you look at it from like a a zoomed out perspective, this guy's laying in bed watching football, which rocks. It's it's our job.

Yeah, we, we just go couch.

This is the best like, like, I should be so lucky. Most, I'd say. 99 of people listening to this podcast would quit their jobs tomorrow if it meant that their job would now become laying in bed and watching football in a second.

That's, I mean, this is the time of year where we have to like. As much as I get a little anxiety of like, oh, like, I'm not gonna be around on Sundays like this is no. Everyone wants our job because we get to just watch every game on Sunday, but we have to the fucking best. But we?

Have to sit up in chairs.

That's true. Like Converse, like child, child laborers and bet all the horrors.

It's tough.

We are no different than the minors, the nine-year-old minors, like 1902.

So, uh, so uh, this is, it's a great picture. We can only hope that that Darryl Bevel becomes the first coach to coach on the on the sidelines. Wearing an eye patch. Yes, we almost had it with Mike Zimmer a few years ago when he got, you remember, his eye. Just get. It kept getting worse and worse and worse. Stopped watching film? Yes.

Yeah, that's, I mean, they're, they're willing to risk it all. Yeah, in every capacity. Uh, all right.

Other things, I'm just so excited.

Am I back on Football Guy Duty this season?

No, who's doing it? I think we're just going to say football guy stories.

Okay, we're not going to do it.

We're not, we're not going to do official football Guy of the week. We're just going to be like, this guy right here is probably football guy of the week, yeah.

Good, good, good question, though, Jake, because we also we're going to change a couple other things up. We're going to do on Fridays the preview, we're going to preview every game. Instead of doing a, uh, four picks each. What we're going to do is just everyone. We're going to preview every game normally. And then at the end, everyone's going to give their best pick, uh, spread and total, and we're, and and there can't be any duplicates.

It was awesome. Magic would be a good idea also just getting like a reptile handler or a bunch of animals to come out and you just have animals join you. On releasing just a bunch of crickets, that would be great, yeah.

Yeah.

Here's my show.

Yeah, everyone be careful. I mean, it would be great. Uh, all right, what other things, any other stories that we should talk about?

I'm going back on the uh, on the Gremlin. Over three and a half field goal bets last last year, it was plus money. It hit at like 71. It was the best bet that ever made in my life.

Yeah.

So we're going to ride it, we're going to ride it over fuel, goals and the lines, money line.

Hank's back on his hungry dog. I saw him tweet that it triggered me a little because, you know, he's just going to pick against our teams every week.

Oh, of course, yeah. I know he's going to take the Cardinals week one, I know it, I know those are. It might be the hunger song in the league.

It's always, you always find a way to make it personal. It's either it's either against the commanders or against the can't lose parlay, which will be bad question about the picks. Yeah, you can fade somebody, right?

Bed here I'm commander's minus seven. Can I just say that we you allow me to take command? Who gets to go first? I already put it in.

We have to figure out who goes first.

This is my, this is my makeup for Texas tech. I'm doubling down commies or bust.

Okay, well, hopefully you get first pick.

All right.

Now Hank's going to just take the command.

He would never, hank, would never do that.

Yes, he would, he would do that to you.

Hank loves plus signs.

Oh, I'm so excited for football.

On the golf course and on his bet slip.

Also, uh, for people who don't know new listeners, Monday's shows No guest will be all football. All the time. We go through every single game, which is great because you know, there's a lot of, a lot of teams that don't get any shine. Uh, in the national media, they just get forgotten after like two weeks, basically the entire NFC South.

Yeah.

We, we find a way to make jokes about those teams for the entirety of the year and it's great and I'm very excited. Sunday What are you guys going to wear on Sunday?

Talk, What are we going to eat?

I'm wearing. What are we going to eat on Sunday?

I'm going to wear a tux and I'm on cheese steaks.

We do, we do have to figure out what we're going to eat all day, cause it's a big like you can't fuck up the menu for week one. This is a conversation that needs to be happening all across America, with everyone and their friends. This is important.

I like bacon ranch subs, I like eating like combo, I like eating, what is that?

What is the Big Cat Combo? I didn't even know that existed until I saw the ad.

I'm not sure, yeah.

I like having one slice of pizza in between the early and the late games.

Just a just a little, a little pizza that's just out that we can nosh on.

Yeah, it keeps you awake, it keeps you going in between the games.

Um, yeah, we have to. These are things that we have to think about.

I'd like a root beer. Can I get a root beer? I would also like a root beer. Okay, let's get some root beer.

I was like, a combo is a choice of cheese, steak, fries and a drink all in one.

That's it, that's, you know, Big Cat loves that.

Yep, what is it?

Fries Fries, cheese, steak of choice, fries and a drink.

That is so insane. It just might work, yeah. A sandwich, fries and a drink.

It was a real, it was a real big deal.

And everyone's marketing wizards.

If it was a real big cat combo, it would be a two subs one for the one you put in the fridge so you eat at halftime.

If you want to get wild with it, get the Big Cat Combo, but make it PFT style. Which is where you take the fries and you put them on the sandwich.

Ooh, I like that, yeah, I like that, yeah.

Pardon my cheese steak.

There we go, the plug, God added again, Uh, okay, let's do a hot seat, cool throne. And then we have Pete Prisco, Dalvin Cook, Jim Bows and the worst draft we've ever done the pancake draft, pancakes only.

That's the only reason why we weren't able to name five guys.

Yeah, exactly. uh, all right.

No joke. I think I might have a cane sauce problem. I was raising canes the other day, getting my box combo with extra sauce on the side. Like usual, I have an order.

Okay, hank, hot seat, cool throne.

My hot seat is Riley Leonard.

Oh, yeah, we shouldn't we? we we Clemson fans were like, Oh, thank God, you guys recorded, uh, you know, before the game ended, we should you go, but then we should, we should bury Clemson.

Yeah, so Duke beat Clemson upset, uh, and then close game though.

Right?

No, not even close, oh, but Clemson got the over. No, they didn't.

Oh, 28 seven.

Ooh, at least Duke didn't storm the field on them. They did, oh, and then afterwards, Riley Leonard, the quarterback had a great, a great touchdown, running touchdown. He was doing a press conference or interview after the game and said, Professor Taylor, if you're seeing this, please let me turn in my homework late because it's due tonight, I think at 12..

Ooh.

And then Professor Taylor, which if you haven't seen the picture, look him up. He just is the most professor looking duke, professor, professor.

Taylor of all time, of all time.

He said Wesley, Williams and the other linemen who were in the class, they.

Said they prepared ahead of time.

So why didn't the quarterback?

Oh, no way, man.

No extension.

What an absolute dickhead.

That's the most Duke story ever, with the exception of Duke winning at football.

Yeah, what a fucking asshole. I don't like this guy.

You know what that tells me, that tells me that, that Riley Leonard was not prepared to win. No, that tells me he thought he was going to lose and then he'd have time after the game to send it in.

Yeah, uh, Clemson, though, done Davo. It's very great bearing Davo.

Yeah, so I mean, Davo doesn't want to change, and so he's not going to. If he did change, I'll say something nice about Davo. He's not being as big a hypocrite as I expected him to be. So when he said, like, I didn't want to change, I don't want college football to be run by money, I'll quit.

I I also the one thing I don't like whenever we talk about college football. It's a little different than the NFL, where, like the the head coach is recruiting the players, he's getting the best players. So when people are like, Oh, it's not so easy, like you don't have Trevor Lawrence and Deshaun Watson, well, Davo does deserve credit for getting those guys. It's kind of like the dion when people are like, Oh well, he had better talent at Jackson State than everyone else.

Now you have to ask, was Brent Venables, was he? was he the real mastermind behind Clemson? Cause I feel like you could make that argument. Yeah, I think I might make that argument, actually.

Go ahead and make that argument.

I'll make the argument because when Brent Venables left, Clemson started to suck.

Yes.

So I just want to leave you with one last Davo quote. How quickly we forget? I think this was just last year is in December. We built this program on nil, we really did, Swinney said. It's probably different from what you're thinking, though.

All time quote.

Yup Ah, davo.

He's just corny, That's really what it comes down to. It's hard to root for a guy who's that corny, you know?

And also some people bring up the fact that they weren't paying God. Yeah, Davo. also, they were using God's name, image and likeness. That's that's worse than anything else. I think he was paying God because he was doing baptisms after practice.

Davo also has the, uh, like, a treasure trove of memes that come back at him, the the L running out with the L. That's a memes classic, memes classic. Running down the hill before his whole team, him doing the tick tock, the hickory dickory dock dabbles on the tick tock. Like, all these just come flooding on the timeline. And it's just a lesson to all the coaches out there. If you're ever going to stop recruiting and doing transfer, Portal and Nil, try not to be on tick tock as well.

Good point.

Also, very, very, very niche, uh, advice.

Did you see that Davo was upset because of how far the locker rooms are at? Duke from the field?

Oh, no.

So he was starting to blame that I like that now, that that Davo's the last guy that should do that. Because he makes his team get off a bus at the top of a hill and then follow him, sprinting down it to go onto the field. I kind of the the. The journey from the locker room to the field should not have an impact for that team.

Yes, I kind of like, though, like, it's back to the Shane Beamer blaming the guys, the chain gang eating hot dogs. I kind of like, when, uh, these coaches just become such, like obvious babies, cause we know they're babies. But when they show their colors like that, I, it does tickle me a little.

What's that was buyout right now? Oh oh oh, let's look that up.

I mean, the thing is, he is, he did win two national titles.

He's not going anywhere.

Clemson Clemson was not good, or they couldn't get over the hump for the longest time. He went and built that program to an insane level, so he does some. It's not that he's a bad coach.

Some people would also point to the defensive line, that one year having a bunch of those PED positive tests.

Dabbo.

Something interesting.

All right, wait, hold on. I got to draft my kicker. I'm taking Jake Elliott. I'm doing a draft right now.

$64 million buyout, $64 million word on the street is what I'm hearing Big cat in NCAA circles is that Clemson is considering a buyout.

I liked that they they also detailed in the buyout here, like it almost like as if it gets cheaper. It's 64 million this year, it drops to 60 million for 2024, and then get this, this is discount 57 million in 2026..

I think they're going to wait through this season.

That's no, he's not going to, he's not going to lose his job. No, he's not going to lose his job. But it is fun to. It's fun to root against Dabbo when he loses. Sorry, Clemson fans, but you knew that it's part of winning.

I'm a cox man.

It's part of winning, if you win, the pendulum swings back. Uh, okay, hank your cool.

Um, my cool throne is pettiness. Oh, this league. Alabama Texas big matchup this weekend. Uh. Last year they played, and Alabama's band did not travel to Texas, cause the Longhorns only gave their band upper deck seats.

Yeah.

Yeah, I love, I love Band Wars.

Yeah, and band people are the horniest. Oh, for sure, it's not just the American pie like trope, it's.

So if you, if you think that Northwestern football had a hazing issue, look at band culture across America. I think they should just show up and go harder than ever. Yeah, like Alabama just not showing up to, or no, Texas not showing up last year was kind of lame. no, Texas showed up last year.

Texas.

It was a whole band and not travel. Yeah, so yeah, I agree with you, the Texas Longhorn band should just say, fuck it, we're going anyways.

I also, I stand with bands in college football, I think it's a great part of the game. I love hearing when, like, Oklahoma or USC gets rolling and they just play that over and over and over.

It's how you know you're watching college football.

Yeah, it's great. Uh, no, you don't like it.

The halftime, I mean, it's it is what it is.

The halftime I don't care about, no one watches the halftime show.

It's like the in-between plays, like the FSU War chant.

Is that Florida?

That's kind of, yeah.

No, is it LSU? No, what's the No. What's that?

That's, uh, that's narcos.

Yeah, we went out.

That's a bang. Texas goes, duh duh, duh, duh, duh, duh duh.

Yeah, the boomer sooner is the what do they play? they play the I get. I always fucked this up with USC.

I think they do dun dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun dun.

I need to listen to it real quick.

It's Jurassic Park.

Yeah, I was going to say, Yeah, that's definitely.

Star Wars, Star Wars.

This is a lot of intro.

They're all very similar, I think they all have, like, very similar chord progressions I'm going to get to work on.

Well, when you play with the, when you play with the the trumpet and the trombone, they kind of all blend together. Yeah, that's true.

Yeah.

Um, you're either doing college football, uh, touchdown or Scott.

I was really nothing else, both great things, my favorite things.

I would be great if one team did a scar.

They they usually do if you, if you want to go with further. Touchdown song. Yeah, if you watch March Madness, though. Every band they have, they're like, Okay, let's do a fun one, and they play real big fish.

Yeah.

Yeah, or take on me, uh, the real big fish version of Take on me.

Who's who's cool?

Uh, that was my cool throws.

Oh, Jesus.

My other one was diarrhea, but we talked about that. I just wrote unidentified if it's a boy or girl.

Oh so, you were on my only note, you were on that early, okay, uh, pft, your hot seat cool.

My hot seat is Obama. Yeah, Obama's on the hot seat. A friend of the program, longtime Stoolie.

It does not matter.

Good news for everyone Jake will be watching the entire interview and giving us spark notes on Friday show.

So I want all, I want all the details.

I'm going to go in fresh, open mind. I don't know if he's gay or not, or if he's had sex with this man or not. Jake, you have to just give us the facts, lay them out for us, and we will then make a decision.

I have not made up my mind number one about whether or not they had sex to whether it matters right. So I need you to update me on that. I'm I'm waiting for facts to come out.

How do we want this presented? Powerpoint just spoken or?

Um, it's spoken.

It's braille, spoken's good.

I don't know, I kind of want a powerpoint.

Just one slide does it matter?

No, I don't know.

You got to do it, you got to tell us the story about what happened.

Yeah, yeah, but what? yeah, what's his deal? Okay, top bottom, who is, you know? He's going to go into detail.

For Friday.

Yeah, I'd like to see a powerpoint. Thank you, we cover it all, okay?

My cool throne is Lyon, France, Lyon. I don't know how you pronounce it, Lyon. I'm going to go with Lyon, Lyon.

Yes.

Yes, how great would that be? Yes, if they? Just if Boltman was out there just berating Brandon Staley for not going for it on more fourth downs afterwards.

Yes, we need that. It would be fucking awesome, I don't think it should just be a fan press conference.

It should be a fan press conference that the players have to listen to. And yeah, you are allowed to if you're not even a fan. If you're just a gambler that lost money, you're allowed to publicly air your grievances. With Todd Gurley for taking a knee.

Yeah, yeah, just just rip into him.

I love it, I love this, it's such a fun video.

Um, all right, my hot seat is the Angels for two reasons one is Lucas G. Alito, Uh, who was an angel when the Angels were trying to go all in at the deadline. Uh, is the first player since, I think it's 19, uh, I think it was actually 1898, I got to find it.

That is pretty cool.

Hard to do. He's done it three different times, three different teams. He started on the White Socks, went to the Angels, now is on the Guardians. The last one to do it was Bill McGee, Bill McGee, who you probably all know.

I have to imagine that it was pretty easy to do that back then. Yeah, people could just move, you move like two towns away. Yeah, you're just like no idea what happened to that guy.

Um, and then the Angels also, because they had picture day to day and they had a body double for Shohei Otani.

That seems racist.

Well, it was actually a white guy.

Okay, that's not racist, cause I think actually that's very funny. I think they literally were now.

I think when when they did body double, I think it was literally a guy standing in a full uniform that they were going to. Then just put in. Shohei Otani.

Okay, I like that, yeah.

That's good. I thought the same thing at first, it was like, Wait, what the fuck? And then I saw the guy. Cause they'd like. You could only see the back of him, uh, walking out of the clubhouse, and then they escorted him out of the stadium. I think like, that's pretty sick, though.

Oh, there's a clear picture of him.

Oh, there is. Oh yeah, he's a white guy, right? Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, that guy looks nothing like Shohei Otani, No.

So I think they're just doing a full Photoshop. Cause I thought my mind went to the same place. I was like, what the fuck?

So where was Shohei?

Uh, injured, injured, yeah.

He can't stand for a picture.

No, his arm.

Sometimes they don't like, they just like, go off to rehab or something.

I don't know well, he's pretty sure he's playing again.

Yeah, he's hitting, yeah.

But he wasn't there either way. They're a clown organization through and through. My cool Throne is Max's favorite player. TREy Turner Uh, because he just went on paternity leave. Which is not remarkable, except for the fact that it's exactly nine months to the day that he signed his $300 million contract.

I'm actually surprised that that resulted in pregnancy.

Yeah.

I would figure he'd be using all the holes.

Well, maybe doggy.

Yeah, doggy yeah.

Doggy usually gets pregnant.

It shoots a deep reminder for when he comes back for you guys, but on him, the homer.

Oh, yeah, yeah.

It's a baby bump reel in baseball.

I don't know. Oh so just hit the home run every game now. oh, after you cheered for him every single game, he hits home run, wow.

It is pretty good. Yeah, good for him. Congrats, Trey.

You should probably be back tomorrow.

I miss you.

Uh, but that's fine, all right? Trey Turner has hit three out of the last four games. He's hit a home, the four out of the last five.

Is he? Has he done any cool slides this year?

Oh, no, he hit a couple.

I love, I love Trey Turner's cool standing ovation.

He's been insane. Yeah, no, he actually Max is sort of right. He's hit, uh, looks like seven home runs in the last eight games. That's pretty crazy. Good job, Max.

Uh, my hot seat is us as football fans, because, unfortunately, Chris Mortensen is stepping away from ESPN. Oh, people use the word legend all the time. He is a legend in the football media game.

Jake's trying to take our 500 out of a hundred excitement to 499.

Thank you Jake. No, you're right. I mean, Chris Mortensen, the legend, living legend, great guy.

This is just like the most exciting time.

And you're like, I was just like, pumped for football, I was pumped to, like, take my shirt off and beat my chest.

Good job, mort.

Yeah.

I like mort, I like mort.

He is a legend.

I just like he shouldn't have retired right before football season, he should have retired right after the draft. And we would have been able to be like, Mort. We miss you, we love you. Great job, yeah.

He also was big to flake eight.

Oh, go off, go off, hank, you don't forget.

Made up rumors?

Yeah, wasn't he? The initial tweet? Yeah, 11 out of 12 footballs, yeah.

But great, I'll miss you mort.

Great career.

Minus a completely false story. That was just other than that, though. You can't win them all.

Yeah, yeah.

Great, Yeah, this is a great tribute to Chris Morrison.

Yes, great job.

Uh, my cool throne is college basketball. Oh my God, let's go back here in Chicago. Yes, unreal. A doubleheader. FAU versus Loyola, Chicago, Mississippi State, Arizona State.

Yeah, Bobby Hurley, we get to call Bobby Hurley game and fucking on a sister gene game. This is in the crowd, or you got to take a picture with her.

I might challenge her to rough and rowdy.

You might ask, you should ask for a lap dance.

I should give her a lap, right?

I know you should ask her, yeah.

If I can do a lap dance, I'll get her out of the habit so fast. She'll be like, I wasted my life as a nun.

How many listeners do you think we've lost on this episode specifically? We haven't even got to the pancake.

I think sister Jean would find me attractive.

Clemson fans are gone. People who are like, Uh, I don't want to hear diarrhea talk for 15 minutes, uh, people who love religion. And again, we have not gotten to the pancake.

Well, no, it has nothing to do with sister jeans more than anyone who's a family member.

Of more.

I'm not talking about her religion, I'm just saying she would maybe think I was a fox.

Yeah.

It would be maybe the biggest, maybe the biggest sports story ever.

Let's fucking just be honest, right now, it would be a hell of a story.

I mean, even if you got a head from her, the camera at the Marshall invitation, it pans up into the stands. And sister Jean, and I'm, like, on my knees, like Kanye West wife in that boat.

Oh, it was a perfect last pre football.

Yeah, yeah, no, but that's a good plug. Yeah, go buy the tickets.

Bands or the balcony bands of the balcony.

We'll see Rico Bosco, we'll get probably 15 shots at a half court shot. Uh, but we are, we're gonna have a bunch of same as last time. It was awesome, we had a bunch of barstool personalities doing a bunch of shit.

Barstool Link Slash invitation.

Max, Would you titty fuck sister? No.

I thought he was going to say something like, we can't run this. He's like, No, I got one more, I got one more. I've been thinking about it. He's a Vince Carter meme.

I've crunched the numbers.

I find this shit, it's humorous, all right. Let's get to our interviews. We've got Pete Prisco, then Dalvin Cook.

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Okay, here he is, Pete Prisco.

Okay.

We now welcome on one of our favorite guests, the fiery Italian we call them.

It actually ends the four day Italian banishment from part of my day for Tom Frunelli. Screwing.

All over all our listeners. But it is Pete Prisco from CBS Sports. He is one of our favorite guests, he watches the film. And we're here to do an N.F.L. preview, as is tradition with Pete Prisco, let's start here, Pete, give me your seven teams in the AFC that are going to make the playoffs.

Okay, we'll start in the East, where everybody else starts, because it's Aaron Rodgers division. Buffalo will win the division, there's still the best team and the Jets have to learn how to win. They haven't won anything.

Yeah, no, keep going, I'll, I'll, we'll go back to that. I just want, you know, it's a good way to start off, to see what you like, yeah.

When their division and the Bengals will win their division, so there's the four division winners. The wildcard teams will be the Chargers, the Browns and the Jets. Wow.

Interesting, So, but wait, you said, the jets have to learn how to win first. Pete, you know football, you've been around this league. I've always been told that first, you have to learn how to not lose before you learn how to win. And the jets don't know how to not lose. Yet, correct?

They haven't won anything. When's the last time? The Jets were relevant? And granted, getting Aaron Rodgers changes the dynamic of the team. But you have to learn how to win big games, close games and playoff games. They've done none of it.

How do you learn how to win? What does that look like?

You do it once and then you come back the next year and then you really can do it.

Okay, for example, yeah.