#1972 - Jim Breuer

Good to see you, my brother.

It might be 32 years.

And to see you just eating, breathing, talking, living, loving, stand-up bro, you would fucking go in the main room. I'd get there right, and your chat, it's crushing, crushing. I'm watching the balcony like a 15-year-old going.

Bro, that felt good for me, you know, when you're able to watch another guy and laugh your fucking balls off. And then you come inside and you're talking more comedy with all the dudes in there. And then you go in the little room and you're telling me. Because I'm way out of my element.

Last night I was just like, this whole time, what the fuck is going on right now? Holy shit.

Like, immediately, the moment you went on stage, we were in the balcony watching you, I was crying. That was the best impression of me I've ever seen anybody do. Well, it's fascinating watching you.

It's reputations, wah wah, wah, wah, wah wah, and then you struggle, but you always stay right here.

And all of them are watching. You're like, I'll watch you. You could sell me probably going into the UFC for this one.

Fucking captivating. I really had a good time. Well, a lot of those guys are getting into martial arts.

It makes you better at other stuff.

You look at people that live in horrible conditions and they seem fine, like you ever see. Like these videos of these villages. And these kids are playing and there's just dirt, there's nothing else, and they're just kicking around a homemade soccer ball, laughing and giggling.

But remember when you were a kid and like, you build a fort, me and you were hanging out for 12 years, are you going to build a fort? Yeah, okay, you're going to end up getting like, Okay, I got a trash can.

I got my dad's jacket, I got the hood of a car, and we love. And then once you build a fort, then you're inside and you're like, this is where we're going to cook, dude. That's what these guys lived in and they it was like watching kids play fort, and they were just so proud.

I went in, I'll show you a picture later. It's so fucking cool. You go in and they, that's all they got. I think that when you say that's all they got, it's a misconception.

I'm not talking about like third-world people who live in like rural poverty. I'm talking about hunter-gatherers, I'm talking about people that exist off the land, right? There's something about that they think resonates with people, because that's how we evolved.

And so when people do that, they're very happy. Like, they had a really interesting docu-series on Vice back in the day called Heinmo's Arctic Adventure. And it's about this guy, Heinmo Korth. I hope I'm saying his name, right, I think I am.

And this dude moved up to the Arctic in, like the 1970s, and he's been there ever since. This dude doesn't have a. He's got a TV with like VHS tapes, and he watches movies occasionally. He saw about 9-11, he saw a photo of 9-11, he's still never seen the planes go into the towers.

And this guy moved up there and met this woman, this Indigenous woman, and had a family with her. And this fucking guy lives in. Like a log house that's in the middle of the woods, and he's surrounded by grizzly bears. He had to kill a grizzly bear on camera. In the middle of this thing, the grizzly bear was coming to kill his dog or eat his caribou or something. No, it's killed one of his dogs in the past.

Like, you'd have your dogs tied up outside to bark to make sure that they know when bears are coming. And a bear ate his fucking dog, the dog was tied up, they came back, the dog was dead. Or just pieces of it?

Like, and this guy lives like this and he's so happy, but he's also super intelligent. So when this guy's talking, he's explaining how. I think this is how people are supposed to live.

There's no other way to do it. They have to get through, so everyone has to survive. And the thing tipped over.

It's life, that's the part, like it doesn't matter. Part of me wants to go back to that.

I know it's going to be a battle, but there is part of me that feels like this should be the new school. But is there a mix between living that way? And like, Hey man, let's go get some pizza and burgers? Yeah, let's go see a Franken-movie.

Yeah, or let's go see, we have to get two nuts out. Here is there? Because I like, that's the new school, learning how to build a home, learning how to live off the land.

They have these wood cuts where they wedge into each other perfectly, and then they have a separate wedge that they put in each piece to secure it in place. And they built this house this way, with no nails, over 100 years ago.

And they had this whole building built like this, there's no nails, and it existed like this perfectly for a hundred years.

So they're deconstructing it, I'm hoping that they're going to reconstruct it, I don't know what they're doing.

A bunch of videos have shown this stuff, it's amazing because it's not like they didn't have nails back then. But what's fascinating about someone who's willing to commit to building stuff like this is like, this is engineering, this is art, this is architecture. I mean, these guys look at how they're doing this, man.

When they're making all these things slide into each other and secure in place with wedges, this is incredible, they said. They're bug repellent, too. Oh, treated with bug repellent.

That probably gives you cancer. We've got a bug repellent. That stuff's so nasty. When I did construction, I used to have to carry pressure-treated lumber.

Because I was a grunt and pressure-treated lumber. You get splinters in you and you're basically getting inoculated.

He got me a job working for his construction company, and Jimmy was a carpenter at the time, and I was a laborer. And we had to build a Knights of Columbus ramp, and it was just carrying pressure-treated lumber and cement all day.

Yeah, somewhere around 18. That's the last thing you ever did. I was like, Fuck this.

Because I had entertained some romantic ideas of going into construction, but I wasn't interested in it. I did a lot of construction gigs because my stepdad was an architect, so I was always on construction sites when I was a kid. But that is fucking hard work, man.

What happened to me was he goes, We're working on this. Whatever building, I don't know it was a church, whatever it was, I'm petrified of heights, so I was fine on the ground, gathering things and bringing shit.

But when he was like, Okay, take this screw gun and then you're going to go up the scaffold and fucking, I was like, What?

And then he caught on like 50. He's like, Bru, you haven't even kid, you haven't even gotten one in. I'm like,....

And then he calls you out, Are you afraid of heights? Are you fucking serious right now?

This is not good. Like, look at this way, he's got to climb this thing.

He's like, How do I do this? Yeah, he's fucking stuck. Oh, Jesus Christ.

It was definitely in the maybe it was Canada. It doesn't fucking matter. All I know is you're in a cage and this one goes really high, really high, all right.

And then they started with the shaking and the fucking shaking, and I was so scared I threatened my child's life. I told them I was going to punch their fucking faces. I swear to God.

I'm screaming going, I will punch your fucking face in right now. I swear to God and my wife's like, can't stop. And that was it, man, that was it.

Shut my eyes fucking. I'm never tempting heights ever again in my life, I don't need to. I'm 55, I'm done.

Fucking done.

I don't know if I can do this, dude.

If you can smell it, that means it's getting in your body.

Maybe the way they do it now.

The people need to be entertained.

It was definitely Florida, I think it was Jacksonville, and no audience in an arena, it was wild.

All those bands, thousands of bands are touring everywhere, and all of a sudden in March, like, everything's shut, but up until February, you had thousands of different bands, all the meet and greets.

All the hotels, all the airlines, all the partying.

And no one out of that. You never heard anyone dying, and I saw I would do meet and greets. Have people coughing on me. I didn't know anyone dying, and I'm not saying people didn't die.

We're not saying that because they get pissed. It's like, is someone right now going? Are you saying someone didn't die? No dude, it's not what I'm saying.

If people had adequate levels of vitamin D, I don't know if that's real, but I read this whole report on it and I was like, if that number's real. And they knew that vitamin D was essential to fighting off diseases.

If they knew that it was essential to the immune system, and they didn't tell everybody, they didn't just scream it from the rooftops. Hey, there's this cheap thing that you can get and it really protects you.

It helps you a lot, it's great for you, it's actually a hormone, right? And it's great for you. You should go out in the sun and get it naturally if you can.

But if you can't, you need to get some of this vitamin D. It's really going to help you.

And I would tell everyone.

And hey, it helped me. That's all you did, yeah, now, and it's such an.

It's how nobody sees that moment. If the world is in such utter despair from a disease or whatever you want to, it's killing everyone.

Now, let's say it wasn't that we didn't have the news. You just heard people go, Oh my God, everyone's dying, everyone's gone and like, Well, what do we got to do about it?

You have to get a shot in the neck, you got to get the shot. Well, is there any other? No, there's not. And then out of nowhere.

Someone goes, Hey man, I ate this plant. I'm not saying no, I'm just telling I ate this plant and it's this berry.

Actually, it kind of tastes another. I ate the berry and then I did, like, 10 jumping jacks and fucking stood out in the sun for an hour. And I don't know which of the remedy.

But it helped you think one person will go, whoa, what did you do? Not one human being, and when you saw the vicious attack?

And they were mad, and so the best thing they did, the dumbest thing they did, was say, I took veterinary medicine. They're talking about a drug that is in the World Health Organization's list of essential medicines. It's like they've had billions of prescriptions, not like 100,000..

Like billions of prescriptions of ivermectin.

He's on Fox.

And they think that people are being irresponsible, that's what they really believe. He just was misinformed. That's all it is, you're right.

He just didn't know that. Like this narrative, that there's only one way to deal with this and that this way is actually going to stop it. Well, if it is going to stop it, why do you care who gets it? you should just get it.

Because if you get it, that means that no one else is going to. You're never going to get it. Everybody who gets the shot is never going to get it. That was the narrative, that was a lie from the beginning.

And now we're realizing that it was a lie. Everybody realized it was a lie now. I was talking to someone last night that had Covid really fucking bad after being vaccinated, like, really bad.

Two weeks wrecked.

And his daughter, college, gets the shot. She ends up in the emergency room.

And she's got blood clots on her liver and they're all like, you know, what do you think of it? Well, you know, she rows a lot on the row team. Are you really going to believe that's what it was?

But because this thing came along during the pandemic, and what Robert Malone talks about. Where you have one solution that's presented to a problem that's isolating society, people are literally trapped, and this one thing is offered up as a solution.

And anything that's opposing that gets attacked, because everybody does the work of the propaganda machine. The regular people do that work because they genuinely believe that you're a knucklehead if you don't go and get vaccinated.

And you're going to fuck this up for everybody and we're never going to get back to work. So they have that in their head and that's their narrative. He just never looked.

He's an old guy, okay? He probably wasn't looking into it, and he really thought that he was probably doing the right thing, encouraging people to go get it.

But I feel like people like him and everyone that have been out there, even the ones that believed everything. And that's okay, because they get scared and I get it.

Yeah, there's still ladies on air, there's still masks on planes, you can tell they're scared, they're scared.

They got them, but they need to understand. It's like when you're humbled, Hey man, I might have been.

Maybe I shouldn't have said that, it's all cool, but I guess by their actions, I still feel it. But what makes me crazy is, isn't that a well-orchestrated, marketed, funded way to murder?

At the end of the day, like to purposely keep people from getting healthy and actually stopping people. What if your mother?

That's your angel in your life.

And what's being forced and threatened?

And ridiculed and shamed.

Is that child or that husband?

And they do it, and the people that created all this, let's not pretend they don't exist. The people that created this, they knew exactly what they were doing.

Because they planned this in steps. You're not that smart to pull this off without really putting a lot of logic into this. And to me, that's murder. I don't know how you explain it any other way.

Because those things are not going to earn the money, because then you lose all trust in them. Because, like, all you're offering up is a pharmaceutical remedy. For whatever the situation is, you're not saying that there's any other things that can help.

When we know that human bodies, there's a lot of things going on, man. And your nutrient levels are very important, your metabolic health is very important for your immune system. All those things are connected and together.

And to think that the way to fix that is only an injection, says. Who and why are we listening to people that say that anybody that says that is crazy?

The whole thing is important, all of your health is important. We should be encouraging people to be fit and healthy, and to make healthy food choices and to take supplements.

And to exercise regularly and to, like, meditate.

Those things are as good as medicine. If what you could get from being healthy was available in a medicine, it would be the most popular medicine in the fucking world. What you could get from being a fit, healthy, happy person? Holy shit, would that be a valuable medicine?

And you can get it for free, that's available. You just gotta do it. And they don't tell you that because they don't really give a fuck about your health.

They give a fuck about you following the rules, and if you follow the rules, especially pertaining to this one, then they make a fuck load of money and they have no accountability.

And that's what it is.

It's so dumb, it's one of the dumbest checkers move ever. You know what it is? It's like playing chess and you just run your king out to the middle of the table. Fuck you man.

You're taking horse medicine. We're just gonna repeat it over and over again. No one's gonna know the difference, no one's gonna research the billions of human prescriptions, the fact that it's an antiviral.

That it stops viral replication in vitro, that there's studies on it, the fact that it stops yellow fever. People get all these parasites, it kills them.

You're so stupid, it was one of the dumbest things. How could anyone ever trust them now, when you know that? This is how they treat something as so easily provable of being false and what doesn't make any sense?

Like, the attack literally makes no sense. You should be asking, Hey, how'd you get better so quick? exactly? And I got the hard one. Supposedly, that's the Delta.

Like, how'd you get better so quick?

What are monoclonal antibodies? What is IV vitamins? How does that help when you're sick?

When you're normal sick, or is it just Covid that it helps? IV, zinc, IV, vitamin C and D and B. All that shit is fucking amazing for you.

Are you going to take anything? I say, seriously?

Lied right to your face, right to like, while they were doing it, someone had to have been writing it going.

Oh my god, this is like such dick stuff.

And they are, but they're just run by people, and some people are Dorks, and those Dorks get important jobs. And they put Dylan Mulvaney on a bud light can.

That's what it is. These are dorks, and you see the response that Bud had the most recent response, it's like, the fucking dumbest.

Pro-America raw.

You don't know who you really are. Now. There's like interviews with the lady who is the head of Bud Light, talking about why they did it.

And about the old sort of frat culture attached to Bud Light, dismissing the people and like the humor of the people that like Bud Light.

And so they're going to change that with this crazy attention whore on day 365 of being a woman. I mean, we are in a fucking Coen Brothers movie.

This is a Mike Judge movie.

Raw, raw. It's so stupid and cliche, it hurts my feelings, it's so dumb.

Rooted in the heart of America.

Found in a community where a handshake is a sure contract. What the fuck are you talking about? Opportunity and challenge?

You know, I would respect them if they had this. And then Dylan Mulvaney just starts cartwheeling it to the frame.

Like, what are you doing, what is that, what was that?

So you can't just make this commercial.

That's AI generated, that's probably a chat GPT 4.0 version of the perfect American commercial.

But that's the dumbest commercial of all time. But it's so obvious what they're doing, they're trying to, like. They needed to let that sit for a little bit.

There's guys on the board going, I don't know if this is a good decision, bro.

She didn't disparage the humor of the people that enjoy the product. That is such a crazy move.

If that's what they said, I'd be like, Okay, great. She was disparaging, she was talking about inclusivity and talking about like this sort of frat culture.

Around Bud Light, T..o..'s name is Brendan Whitworth. Is that the guy? There was a woman saying, Yeah, see, that's a man.

So this person was a woman. Unless I'm misgendering them, Jesus Christ, don't say it, it was a woman, for sure.

There's videos of her talking about it, there's videos of her talking about why she made the decision to do this.

You can say that we want other people, like America's freedom, and the freedom to be whoever you want. If you want to be a woman. For Day 368..

That's your freedom, too, but if you're doing that and trying to, like, change, who buys the company and dismiss all the other people?

Who buy the beer from the company? That's so dumb, that's like such a silly move.

Just walking in like, your company's done, what do you mean, fucking done?

Everyone's fucking out, put on the thing that's going to get rid of their crowd. You don't think you're fucked? You'll never kill us. Oh, really.

Positioning the lady was a guy.

Meaning he banks on Tesla doing poorly.

And Elon and him have, like a billionaire feud because of this.

I do, I enjoy it, I enjoy when people are petty.

That is the coolest vehicle I've ever seen in person in my life. The Cybertruck from Tesla. It's a stamped steel, electric, all off-road vehicle that's bulletproof. It could stop a 45 round.

It's you can raise and lower the height so you can off-road. On this fucking thing. It looks like it's a hundred years in the future. When you're standing next to it is absolutely the coolest looking car I've ever seen.

Like, you see it on in pictures, have you ever seen it in pictures? No, if you see it in pictures, it looks fucking badass, but if you see it in person, you realize how big this thing is.

And then you get it in it, it's fucking gorgeous, that's what it looks like.

That's when that thing comes out. You can't make enough of these fucking things, these goddamn things gonna be everywhere, everyone's gonna have a bulletproof car like Bill Gates is making a terrible choice.

That's what it looks like. Oh, you see it in real life, you just go, holy fucking shit.

And these axles, they protrude, they stick down, and so that like messes with your clearance. That's why the trucks are raised.

That's because you can get over more shit. What is this? Oh, video of it driving.

Yeah, I went to visit the Gigafactory and they had it at the Gigafactory and they had been off-roading in it. So it was all covered in mud and shit.

Dude, it's fucking amazing.

You can summon it to you.

It'll come to your app.

I watch people who do it on YouTube. I don't even use the honestly, I don't even use the auto drive when they gave us the new beta.

I fucked with it for a little bit, but I get uneasy. I don't want to not concentrate, I want my hands on the wheel, and I want to concentrate.

One of those Teslas, and he kept turning around and yes, it was steering. Don't do that, buddy.

I don't think I can do that.

I'm not that trusting of it. Also if people try to go in your lane.

So it'll like slam, whereas you maybe would just slow down a little and the person would slide into your lane. It's like, there's subtle understanding of, like, how fast this guy is going.

Whether this guy doesn't see me or whether they're being aggressive, there's different things you have to do. And you can avoid stuff without slamming on the fucking brakes.

And swerving into the oncoming lane.

Why don't you get yourself a raptor? a raptor?

RapTOR You know about that? It's a high performance Ford F-150 off-road capable pickup truck that you can take around the street.

Will it ride like Elon's truck? Oh, yeah, it can do anything. Raptors are super capable, you can go baja fucking racing in one of those things, you can go off-roading in them.

Raptors from the factory, you can take that bitch off-roading. They have crazy capabilities, that's a good question. Show them what it looks like.

It's not going to be cheap. God damn it, you got that torn money, let's go, you gotta spend some of that.

You said this thing last night, it's very funny in your bit, right? But I found myself like, Dude, you talking about Florida bro.

Tomorrow, I'm coming with a Texas thing.

There's something about Toyota's build quality. I know so many people that have tacomas, they never have a problem with those things, never, they just drive.

They just go.

If you want a car or vehicle that's going to last a long time, do the Toyota. It took a while with my dad, he wouldn't do it. Finally, I think his last car is a Toyota Camry.

It was, yeah.

That's a Japanese car being made in America, there's a world market when it comes to cars. if you wanted to have a car that's a really American made car. Tesla is about as close as you get, and even Tesla, of course. The batteries don't come from America, the minerals don't come from America.

You want to get an American car, get an old car that's a real American car, get a 1969 Camaro.

One with the pop-up headlights and one with the fixed headlights.

They were all aluminum, they were basically Japan's response to a Ferrari. That's what the NSX was.

It's like a little Go-kart mid-engine, it's not that fast, but it's really exciting to drive, very fun to drive.

You ever been in one of those?

Yeah, I don't ball like that, that's too hard, you're balling too hard.

That's a car that pretty much anybody who saves up money can get a version of a muscle car.

That's a baller car, that's like an accessible car.

I'm not going to be fucking baller. I don't know if I can ever be a baller if I had to ball it. You know what I really want, you know what I got into.

The Hummers.

Damn, look at that thing that doesn't get your dick out.

Like anytime you want it, when you're making a turn, you stomp on the gas, the ass end kicks out. I was like, this car is so ridiculous, it was so fun.

It was a 2011, I think I had. I loved it. yeah, it looked like that. fucking loved it. it was so much fun.

It wasn't the best built car, but it wasn't that expensive either.

There's something about it. It's like you're in a thrill ride, you're not driving. Every time you're heading on the gas, the top is down, so you hear everything, you hear the brrrrr.

You're stomping on the gas.

Oh, it was so much fun.

We're an American band, I like playing that.

You can still get them, people have them, and they're low mileage.

Red white stripes.

That's, you see now there.

I was in that for a very short period.

I like being higher, I like being higher.

So you don't see it until a second or two after someone who's higher up gets a view of it, that's it. Look at that motherfucker.

But you know what's one of those post Malone has one like that, with the double rear wheels, just to carry around his money.

He just stacks gold in the back of it like a leprechaun and drives around. He's awesome.

Did he really?

A raptor is a little less crazy, but it's still very big and it's like super capable, and it's comfortable because they have a lot of travel.

Like on the Shox, because you off-road in them, it makes driving on the road very comfortable.

I can literally live in the middle of nowhere, I think, and just disappear from sight, maybe for a year or two, I don't know.

But that's where I feel like I'm at at times. So I just need a truck, I don't need a fast car, and maybe a truck.

Well, you know what we were talking about before, we were talking about hunter-gatherer people. I go hunting every year. To me, it's a big reset.

When I go to Utah, when I'm there for a week, it's a big reset. And it's also, man, you're in the real wild when we were there.

I guess it was two years ago that I saw that cat, was it? two years? It wasn't this year, it was the year before that, right?

And he said, Look at that fucking lion, and I look, and I just see these glowing eyes that are underneath this tree and the headlights. It was just getting dusk out.

And the headlights were catching his eyes, and his eyes were glowing. Bro, it was huge. He had this big, old, fucking pumpkin head and these giant forearms.

And he's sitting there. And this was a full-grown Tom Mountain lion. It was a real big male, like a 180 190 pound cat, it was that big.

It was so crazy. I'd seen them before, but the ones I'd seen before were like little ones I saw. Like a 60 pounder, maybe, or a 70 pounder.

Running across the street in Montecito in Santa Barbara, I was just driving and I saw this thing run across the street and then I saw his tail.

I was like, Oh shit, that's a mountain lion.